How to get rid of past relationships?

Sometimes the past breaks into your house uninvited. You don't wait, you don't call, you don't even remember. As you think. And one day...

One day you will have a dream again where you are 16 and next to your first love. And you do something together, communicate, still love each other. You wake up in a cold sweat. You go to the mirror and you, thank God, are the same thirty with a ponytail. Your beloved husband is sleeping nearby. Your children are in the other room.

But this dream seems to raise something in you, excites long forgotten, long seemed to be experienced. You come back to the thought – could it have happened? What would it be like? The female mind is restless, and it builds fantasies easily and quickly. Now you are thinking that if you did not say this then, did not do this, you could ...

Or maybe you had your first husband. A husband you loved with all your heart, but didn't realize you were ruining a relationship. Your suspicion, jealousy, control. Or they didn’t give him enough time and attention. You may even have children left. Like a memory of that love. And when you look into their eyes, you see him again. It's impossible to forget. You have souvenirs from him. It's impossible to cross out. Forget it too. Regrets remain. He was good, you loved him so much.

Rarely does a woman meet her husband at 15-16 and live with him for the rest of her life. That would be perfect. For the woman herself first and foremost. But often before we find our only one, we have time to fall in love a few dozen times. Building relationships with a dozen men. Dating someone for a short time, and with someone for years. Sometimes we get married several times. Sometimes we live in a civil marriage.

It's impossible to forget. You can't let go. You can't shut it down. And you're standing in the middle of the street, and that song is playing from somewhere. You remember it by heart. Something important happened under her. But not in your relationship with your husband. Tears are coming up, long-forgotten pain is rising. And shame and guilt. For still remembering it.

When it is said that it is better for a girl to remain chastity until marriage, what is it about? Discrimination? Patriarchy? Homegrown? No, about protecting the girl herself. So that other men would not dream of her later, they would not be tormented by doubts “what if”, do not stir memories, do not open the wounds of melodies and smells. So she could live in peace and love her husband with all her heart. Not some part of it that survived many heartstorms. With all my heart. Totally and sincerely.

I know a few of these families. They met and fell in love at school, met for a long time, were the first to each other. I have never seen such respect in other families. They are all of them; they are all of them. Four kids. The house is full of cup, the wife loves and respects her husband, the husband is a breadwinner. All in all, the Vedas. It's all natural. Of course it's luck. Or good karma from a past life. The rest have to clean up the rubble of their souls all their lives.

Men are arranged differently – they are easier to forget, switch, get out of relationships. And for a woman, any heart connection is a strong rope. It usually comes out with a piece of heart. If there was any exchange of fluids in the relationship – even kisses – the rope becomes steel. If there was sex, the thickness of the rope becomes even greater.

And then after so many relationships, we can't learn to trust and respect our husband. It is as if we have nothing – the whole heart is wounded and striped with such ropes. Many of them remain alive even after we have long since separated. And through them, like pipes, our energy flows. It flows towards someone who was once dear and important.

That's what my daughters need to talk about. From an early age. Something worth preparing for. Explain to her why chastity matters in this unchaste world. Take care of her in a way we couldn’t take care of ourselves.

What do you do with yourself? How to heal these wounds – as much as possible? How do you cut these ropes? I will tell you about several ways of cleansing, which give a good effect. I tried it myself, my friends responded well, the readers got the results.

This is an important introduction. You'll never forget. Memories will be dulled, no longer painful. But you will not erase and throw away the person and everything connected with him. You can't rewrite history. To blame yourself all your life for your impatience or curiosity is stupid. As well as worrying about what could be saved. By clearing yourself of past connections, you can feel a lightness that you never knew before.

Letters of offense.

The main thing to understand, if the relationship is disturbing, it means that there is not all lived. So there's something unsaid. There are feelings that have been blocked. For example, pain, longing, sadness, anger. If we can still afford to live longing and sadness – many people roar for weeks after a breakup – then anger is worse. We save face. We're afraid of losing him forever. That anger doesn't go away.

For example, I was very worried about my first love, still school. We have been together for several years and separated. They were going to get married at eighteen. He married at eighteen. The other one. I have been through so much pain and pain over the years, either together or together. Every time I tried to save my face, as my mother taught me. I didn't scream, I didn't make scenes. I just walked out the door and wept in my pillow at home.

There was a lot. But there was no outlet for one emotion. Anger. Anger at being treated like this again and again. That I'm being hurt. And I make a good mine in a bad game. And many years later, I was still going back to my memories, and it was haunting me. Until one day, quite accidentally, by the way, during a correspondence about who lives, I said to him: "And yet you are a bastard." In this one phrase, everything that I have been silent about for so many years was realized for me. And I was let go. The courage to say aloud what has long been a burden gave a lot of energy.

At the time, I didn't know anything about offense letters. Now I understand that it is better to say this not to the person’s face, but to paper. She'll take it. But the fact that it has to be recognized, spoken, lived is important.

I remember the placement of a woman whom my husband left after twenty years. Her friend. She didn't do a concert either. Just packed his things. Helped him again. And she was left with her grief. Being alone at forty with a ponytail is scary. For almost a year she could not let go and continued to wait for him. And when we made the arrangement, it was immediately apparent that her anger was blocked. This anger was broadcast by their children, who took their mother’s side and hated their father.

The job wasn't easy. And to the end to express anger she did not succeed. But now she's married again. For another man who loves her and carries her. She's never been so happy. Because before entering into this relationship, she cleared her heart of the previous ones.

One of the methods of working with the living of the senses is arrangement. But often you need to do a few jobs to live fully. It also requires material investment. It's not always possible.

There is also a home option – a letter of offense. You need some privacy for an hour or two. Take your paper and pen with you. The computer won't work. And write a letter to your ex. Not ordinary, but according to a certain scenario.

You pass through the letter to all feelings in the specified order. Write every paragraph, every emotion, until you feel a slight emptiness, when there is nothing to write about. This is a signal to move on to the next one.

Dear Vasya! I am angry with you for being... I resent you for being... It hurt me a lot when you... I am very afraid of the fact that... I am disappointed that... I am saddened that... I'm sorry that... I am grateful to you for... I apologize for the fact that... I'm letting you go. Do not take it formally, write everything, even if it seems crazy to the brain. It can take a lot of paper and a few hours, especially the first time. You'll probably cry. Unless you've forgotten how to do it. Through tears is also cleansing.

Breathe deeply – breathing also helps to live all emotions. And write.

When the letter is finished, a void will likely appear inside you. Nice void. Which needs to be filled with something good. For real. You can enjoy something you love.

It is good after such a letter to take a bath with salt or shower, drink clean water, change clothes. It's still good to pray after that. Ask God for help in what you have just done. To help you let go of a man and start living life to the fullest.

What about the letter? You did the main thing, you do not need to send it. Burn, flush down the toilet, bury it in the ground. Sometimes a letter is not enough. And after a while, something may come up again – just repeat the procedure again.

"Burning the Connections" Meditation

I can tell you another way to deal with the past. The essence of meditation is very simple. Choose a time when no one bothers you. Close your eyes. Imagine a man you can’t say goodbye to. It's like you're standing in front of each other.

And all of a sudden, you see your bodies connecting the threads. They come out of different parts of your body and enter the same part of a man’s body. They're different thicknesses, different colors. Some places have more of them. For example, if you have had a sexual relationship, there may be a lot of threads and ropes in the lower chakras. If you loved a man very much, the threads will be located in the heart area and so on.

Look at this picture from the outside. No evaluation or analysis. Then mentally ask for the support of the higher forces. Tell him you are ready to say goodbye to him.

And then, mentally set fire to those connections. Do not cut them - they can grow back. Better burn it. One at a time, one at a time, and one at a time. You're more comfortable.

The main thing is that at the end of the meditation you also stand opposite each other and there are no connections between you. Many people say that at this moment the man begins to smile. So he felt better, too.

In this place, you can mentally say goodbye, thank, turn around and leave. My life. Your present.

After meditation, it is also good to take a bath, drink water, change clothes. And if you haven’t done it yet, do the cleaning. And throw away everything that reminds you of that relationship.

One woman could not let go of her husband, who had left ten years ago. And then we found out she still keeps her wedding dress. It hangs in her regular payroll cabinet and reminds her every day.

After saying goodbye to the dress, there was energy in her life. And another man.

You can do different meditations – there are many of them. Almost all of them are aimed at living blocked feelings. Where nothing is blocked and everything is lived, it ceases to hurt. And this can be remembered without pain or doubt. Thank you.

It is important to remember that the past cannot be changed. This experience has made you what you are now. Maybe life has become more difficult for you. You have learned to be wiser and more patient. We learn from our mistakes.

The past must be able to be grateful. For what it taught and what it gave. It is better to live in the present. That's the only thing we can call life. published



Author: Olga Valyaeva

P.S. And remember, just changing our consumption – together we change the world!

Source: www.valyaeva.ru/kak-ochistitsya-ot-proshlyx-otnoshenij/