On what basis do we choose each other Bashny.Net

Looking back, you wonder: why choosing among so many gentlemen, gave hand and heart to this? And what I was thinking? And, perhaps, not thought, and succumbed to the call of instincts?

Why do we attract some representatives of the opposite sex, and others indifferent? It is influenced by a cocktail of factors.





Attractive the individual

Love at first sight exists. It is proved that a 7 seconds to evaluate a person and make of it a first impression. A flutter of eyelashes, the curve of the neck, dimples is just one attractive detail may play the first violin in the origin of feelings of affection.

Everyone in the subconscious there is a set of characteristics that should have a perfect partner. Seeing at least one such dash, you start the process of increased attention to its owner. And if nothing will spoil the impression, the mechanism of love, you began to work.

Go to the smell of a Secret agent in the selection process and become a special biologically active substances that the body secretes pheromones. Getting through the sense of smell in the brain, these flying cupids release their arrows and cause the representative of the opposite sex a sense of longing that is close to sexual arousal. Each of us has an individual smell that is either compatible or not with the pheromones of other people. Thus, the choice in favor of a particular candidate including making our body.

The second half of the First model, with which we unconsciously draw a perfect life partner is the parent. Even if mom and dad are not perfect, and you least of all I would like to see in the second half of their traits, this occurs unconsciously. We orientirueshsya close and familiar. The fact that both parents are there in ourselves is our female and male halves, which carry certain settings, opinions, attitudes and behaviors.

If you understand all these features, even if you reject it, it is possible to find in themselves and their partners. Not recognizing their own shortcomings, we can easily hang them on the partners, or, in psychological language, projected. This is also one of the mechanisms of choice – like attracts like. You may not agree that I – man is indecisive and cowardly, and my partner makes all the decisions in a jiffy and generally does everything fast, then we are two opposites that are closer on the principle of "opposites attract".

This criterion exists. Only he means the following: you have the makings of those qualities that you see in a partner, in this case, the determination and activity, only for whatever subjective reasons you have them do not show. Detecting desired qualities in the beloved that we Supplement ourselves and find our sense of integrity. This is the mystery of our "other halves".

The distribution of roles In the relationship each of us plays a certain role, so pairs are formed on the basis of role requirements and their matches. The main role that we play in a pair – either the role of parent or child. Each of us sitting one and the other, just as in our partner is the original laid in early childhood behaviors.

If you want to see in the companion caring, tender, and catering to parents, you will not be attracted to Moody men with infantile nature. You look for a reliable father, on whose shoulders you can always lean on. Having defined with a single position, the person with the years, it does not change, thereby stepping on the same rakes – looking for a partner appropriate warehouse, instead of having to change yourself and to grow psychologically.

To be continued Every new relationship something different from the previous one, but often the scenario repeats itself and we can only wonder – why do you get partners with the same flaws? You just make the same mistakes. This is largely due to the fact that we offer the image of former loves and expect from a new satellite of the same feats and same dirty tricks. We unconsciously behave in ways that provoke the partner for a certain, familiar behavior.

This, incidentally, explains the fact that different women same men behave differently. The recipe out of the vicious circle one to change and work with your imagination: imagine a dream man in all paints and details, fantasize and pay attention to the pros and cons of their own behavior. Such visualization will help to realize your mistakes and to reach a new level of relations. published

 

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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Source: domashniy.ru/