How to behave on the first date, so that it is not the last

They can be seen immediately: by restrained manners, by carefully selected clothes and jewelry, by trying to give a touch of insignificance to your problem. Single, intelligent and beautiful women over forty. At first I didn’t want to get married, I thought everything ahead, then there was love, he was married, I woke up for a long time, suffered, caught up three years ago, began to go to training. It's kind of bad. Dating doesn't lead to anything. One, two meetings at most. They don't call anymore. What's wrong with me?

The most difficult thing to find in a person with whom, in principle, “everything is like” is this tiny... not even a flaw – a barrier, thanks to which what is supposed to happen does not happen. This beautiful woman was very hard on herself. You can see she tried very hard. Explain. Clarify. Ask me again. Record it. It is this kind of diligence that most often ruins everything.

What are you talking about on the first date?
- Like what? About everything. I ask what a person does, what he loves, who by profession, what music he listens to.
Do you know how many times he’s had to answer that? You're not the only one he went out with. Can you imagine if this is a dating site, for example? You go on these dates like interviews, and all you do is talk, talk, talk about yourself.
- Mmm.
Look at how social life is now being built! In the morning, he opens Facebook, and only while the coffee, the faces of twenty, forty, maybe a hundred women flash before his eyes. He doesn't remember them. But he already knows that ten of them today reposted “At what age does a woman no longer need a man?”, and ten others are fond of what Brad Pitt allegedly said about his wife. He has women at work, too. And the supermarket. And in the afternoon at a cafe for lunch. And when he does dial your number at night to invite you to a restaurant, he doesn't expect anything special, you know? He thinks it's gonna be the same.
But maybe deep down, he still hopes...
- Of course he does. Even waiting for your soul! You don’t have to ask anything – tell me! About how the day went, about the fact that they had recently returned from St. Petersburg, or that the ducks had finally returned to the pond near the house. Wait for sparks of interest to appear in his eyes. Wait until he sips from his glass and suddenly talks about how he kept pigeons with the boys as a child.
- It's complicated.
It’s no harder than sitting nicely and nodding your head smartly. Basically, you only have one short meeting to get into his soul. He will. Shake it. Leave an aftertaste, a trail... So that even if you never meet him, he will remember this meeting as a little adventure. Sincerity and sincerity again! Don't be afraid! Better to seem strange than banal!
- What if I can't?
- You can! Bring the hull forward. You know, when we sit with our backs against the back of our chairs, afraid to even breathe in, we're very tense. Don’t be afraid to put your hands on the table. Even elbows. Put your chin on your fists. That's so sweet, a little childish. Most importantly, you can breathe normally!
- And also?
- Another smile. Smile with your eyes! Most of us do not have a normal smile, we stretch our lips and grin, we think that this means that we like everything. To smile with your eyes, imagine watching your favorite movie. Remember the child’s feeling of delight from “Well, wait!” and your eyes will begin to smile.
- What if he doesn't like me?
- Here you go again. Besides like, there are many other relationships. Believe me, for a first date it is much better that he finds you funny. The more paradoxical emotions you provoke, the more likely he will want to experience it again!
- Ugh. You convinced me! I'll try. .

I think I'll interrupt my story here. Because then the body-oriented psychotherapy session started. A wonderful way to remind a person who he is and how free from internal stresses he can be.

Elena Shubina, body therapist
Source: https://vk.com/body_therapy

Credit: /users/26725