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Why girls grow longer with internal self-doubt
Let's start with the reason: where are diffident girl? It usually begins in childhood and due to the fact that parents do not support the child.
What does it mean? The girl did not say that she is the most beautiful, most intelligent, talented itself the best. The fact that the child does not know how he should relate to her, it is not built into this option by nature. And the first assessment of the child receives from outside. From parents. And it is from this starting point will begin to form its self-esteem.
There are happy families where the children are on hand in the literal and figurative sense, their zatselovyvat, hugging and constantly praise, admire them. So parents often say that "her life was then broken off", "to praise, zaznaykoy grow", "high fall will».
No, I am convinced that high self-esteem is better than down. And the child can not Perelyub. But those girls who did not get from their parents support, which no one called princesses, but on the contrary, constantly pointing out their shortcomings ( "no slouch", "pick up the belly", "how you sit," "no-toed", "Come , at least learn to be nice "," god did not give the mind - well, sort of cute growing ") - these girls grow up already with internal self-doubt
.
Can there be indignant: but what if the clubfoot, slouching? Silence?
Think about it, really child will deliberately stay as it is inconvenient? Walk, putting socks inside, although it is the way? And the animal you would have to stick with the claims "not lie, do not go»?
He is the nature of your child. And if that bothers you, do not harm the child's health is not dangerous, it's just his particularity. He is, and like it should be so. If the problem is of a medical nature, scoliosis, or something else - that it should be solved with the doctors
. Almost all the children getting to school through the stage in the hierarchy of distribution. And if a girl came to school, have doubts that it is cool and worthy of all the best, the first attempt to hurt or offend her succeed.
It just will not be able to fight back. And the circle closes: it kicked off - she took it for granted, because it is not self-confident. She kicked again - she received confirmation that she is a nobody. And if her glasses or she is overweight - then everything will be even worse
. So I want to emphasize that the child never, from anyone of significant adults should not hear negative comments about her appearance and mental faculties. The child must accept yourself and love yourself for what it is, and the task of parents to support him in this.
Many do not succeed, not because they are bad parents and do not like children. They just do not believe in yourself. No matter what words parents say the child reads what they feel.
Uncertain a mother is not able to make decisions. She spent hours wandering through the mall and can not choose a dress. At home, she rummages in the closet and can not decide what will be released today on the street. Uncertain mother did not come to the bakery without makeup. Because she is sitting inside a scary thought: she does not like, and she herself, a poor, will hide. To correct the appearance of clothing or make-up, trying to be someone else, be a Favourite.
Self-confident woman opens a cupboard, takes things don and goes. Self-confident woman comes into the store, take your favorite things prmeryaet buys something that you liked more, or do not buy, because they do not like it, but she does not suffer for this. Self-confident woman gets out of bed, she finds, for example, that milk is over, over his pajamas throws his cloak and goes to the store for milk, without washing or Brushing her hair. She believes that is good in itself, it is not necessary to further embellish themselves.
And now the good news: confidence it is possible to educate yourself, even if a child the confidence you have not invested
. The most important thing to remember: there is no universal criterion of beauty. Not-To. Will not please everyone, and do not try yourself to someone to compare, it is a road to nowhere.
So the first thing to do - stop to ask friends and family about their appearance. Well I look if my hair is like you my new dress - all these phrases should be blacklisted
. Second, learn how to respond to compliments the phrase "Thank you, I am very pleased." Deny yourself excuses, they say, but what you are, but not worth it, so you thought.
Third, eliminate any help friends or sellers when choosing clothes. Guided only by their feelings.
Fourth, never change their decisions, unless there was a force majeure. I decided to do so, go here, spend an evening, so buy this thing - everything gets done
. Fifth, do not engage in self-division into its component parts. Many say so: I have good hair and crooked legs. Or legs beautiful ... sorry, watery hair. Each is good in full, complete.
Finally, regularly telling yourself that you are unique, you are just such, what and should be, especially on anybody not similar, the only one in the world. And love yourself unconditional love, never comparing yourself with others. You - it's you, and you're beautiful
. Author: Michael Labkovsky
What does it mean? The girl did not say that she is the most beautiful, most intelligent, talented itself the best. The fact that the child does not know how he should relate to her, it is not built into this option by nature. And the first assessment of the child receives from outside. From parents. And it is from this starting point will begin to form its self-esteem.
There are happy families where the children are on hand in the literal and figurative sense, their zatselovyvat, hugging and constantly praise, admire them. So parents often say that "her life was then broken off", "to praise, zaznaykoy grow", "high fall will».
No, I am convinced that high self-esteem is better than down. And the child can not Perelyub. But those girls who did not get from their parents support, which no one called princesses, but on the contrary, constantly pointing out their shortcomings ( "no slouch", "pick up the belly", "how you sit," "no-toed", "Come , at least learn to be nice "," god did not give the mind - well, sort of cute growing ") - these girls grow up already with internal self-doubt
.
Can there be indignant: but what if the clubfoot, slouching? Silence?
Think about it, really child will deliberately stay as it is inconvenient? Walk, putting socks inside, although it is the way? And the animal you would have to stick with the claims "not lie, do not go»?
He is the nature of your child. And if that bothers you, do not harm the child's health is not dangerous, it's just his particularity. He is, and like it should be so. If the problem is of a medical nature, scoliosis, or something else - that it should be solved with the doctors
. Almost all the children getting to school through the stage in the hierarchy of distribution. And if a girl came to school, have doubts that it is cool and worthy of all the best, the first attempt to hurt or offend her succeed.
It just will not be able to fight back. And the circle closes: it kicked off - she took it for granted, because it is not self-confident. She kicked again - she received confirmation that she is a nobody. And if her glasses or she is overweight - then everything will be even worse
. So I want to emphasize that the child never, from anyone of significant adults should not hear negative comments about her appearance and mental faculties. The child must accept yourself and love yourself for what it is, and the task of parents to support him in this.
Many do not succeed, not because they are bad parents and do not like children. They just do not believe in yourself. No matter what words parents say the child reads what they feel.
Uncertain a mother is not able to make decisions. She spent hours wandering through the mall and can not choose a dress. At home, she rummages in the closet and can not decide what will be released today on the street. Uncertain mother did not come to the bakery without makeup. Because she is sitting inside a scary thought: she does not like, and she herself, a poor, will hide. To correct the appearance of clothing or make-up, trying to be someone else, be a Favourite.
Self-confident woman opens a cupboard, takes things don and goes. Self-confident woman comes into the store, take your favorite things prmeryaet buys something that you liked more, or do not buy, because they do not like it, but she does not suffer for this. Self-confident woman gets out of bed, she finds, for example, that milk is over, over his pajamas throws his cloak and goes to the store for milk, without washing or Brushing her hair. She believes that is good in itself, it is not necessary to further embellish themselves.
And now the good news: confidence it is possible to educate yourself, even if a child the confidence you have not invested
. The most important thing to remember: there is no universal criterion of beauty. Not-To. Will not please everyone, and do not try yourself to someone to compare, it is a road to nowhere.
So the first thing to do - stop to ask friends and family about their appearance. Well I look if my hair is like you my new dress - all these phrases should be blacklisted
. Second, learn how to respond to compliments the phrase "Thank you, I am very pleased." Deny yourself excuses, they say, but what you are, but not worth it, so you thought.
Third, eliminate any help friends or sellers when choosing clothes. Guided only by their feelings.
Fourth, never change their decisions, unless there was a force majeure. I decided to do so, go here, spend an evening, so buy this thing - everything gets done
. Fifth, do not engage in self-division into its component parts. Many say so: I have good hair and crooked legs. Or legs beautiful ... sorry, watery hair. Each is good in full, complete.
Finally, regularly telling yourself that you are unique, you are just such, what and should be, especially on anybody not similar, the only one in the world. And love yourself unconditional love, never comparing yourself with others. You - it's you, and you're beautiful
. Author: Michael Labkovsky
