We are still at an age where we nedolyubili ... Bashny.Net

I often meet with people who are 20, 30, 40 years old, but it looks. And in there they seemed to have remained in early childhood and are still waiting for the love that did not dopoluchili. And stay there as long as their own do not learn to find satisfaction in itself.

In every age its needs, which means the care and love of parents to have their own characteristics every year.

As an infant begins to form trust, so the love for your child is responsive mother taking care of his needs. If at this age the mother was unreliable, rejected child, etc., it can generate suspicion and concern for their well-being.

In adult life with these people hard to make contact, in a relationship, they are often subjected to partner tests and inspections on trust. In a relationship can feel helpless and vulnerable.

A little later, in 2-3 years, the child learns to be self-contained and self-control develops. If the parents interfere with development in these areas, for example, eagerly and persistently do what a child could easily do it myself, or, on the contrary, expect actions that kid yourself unable to do - develop a sense of shame. And if parents are constantly over-watch over the child and, thus, remain deaf to its real needs, there is a doubt in his ability to control the world and self-control.

Even as adults, these people, instead of to make sure people think that they are considered more closely and with suspicion and disapproval. Also they can appear obsessive-compulsive symptoms or paranoid fear of persecution.

Love for a child aged 3-6 years is to encourage independent action in support of the initiative, in recognition of the right to intellectual curiosity and creativity. If the parents in this period did not allow the child to act independently, excessively punished in response to their needs, develop a sense of guilt.

And then in adult life, such "big kids" do not have enough motivation and determination to set realistic goals and achieve them. In addition, a constant feeling of guilt can cause passivity, impotence or frigidity, and psychopathic behavior.

At school age children formed diligence. If in doubt this period in a child's abilities and status among peers, this may discourage further education, as well as feelings of inferiority can be formed, which later will kill confidence in their ability to function effectively and to exist in the world.

If children experience school achievement and work as the only criterion by which judged on their merits, as an adult, they can become a "labor" in the established society, the role hierarchy.

I offer a helping hand to his inner child and help him grow. To do this, find your child photo or just imagine a child who lives in you. How old is he? What does he look like? What is thinking? Who's next? What was bothering him? ..

Talk to him ...

Take a sheet of paper and two pencils of different colors: one in the right arm, the other - to the left. If you are right handed, the right hand writing on behalf of myself, adult, and the left - on behalf of your inner child. If you are left-handed, then vice versa.

In the dialogue just you and your inner child. Which of you will go to the first contact? How do you start your communication? Responses to the questions you may be unexpected for you.

Now that you have found a child and entered into conversation with him, it's time to install the relationships with him. Communicate with your baby in as much as he wants. Ask what it lacks. Give him what he asks. Call him by name, tell the warm, kind words to express my lyubov.Posovetuyte him something.

Be it in such a parent, in which you need then.

Author: Irina Parfyonova