How to recognize the lies and sincerity to achieve, and whether to do it Bashny.Net

BELIEVE - NOT BELIEVE ...

People learn to lie at the very tender childhood and it is a natural stage of maturation. With time comes the understanding that to live in constant lies extremely difficult and easier to tell the truth about this shall we repeat the parents, the teachers, but still each regularly encounter cheating or forced himself to cheat. But should constantly suspect others of dishonesty, as well as close to paranoia? In fact, it is important to know whether a person speaks the truth, which affects your well-being in the moment and apply a few simple rules to not lead to the deception.

In fact, pathological liars who "lie, like breathing," not many. However, most people prefer the so-called "white lie" - understatement or a slight distortion of the facts to preserve good relations. One of my friends after shopping at her husband question of money spent is always called the sum, in two or three times less than the actual. She said that this method allows you to save nerves and her and her husband. As the lady herself and earned good buy not hit the family budget, and husband, respectively, has been unable to verify the actual costs, the reception was working and no one interfered.




However, there are situations where such understatement can cause considerable damage if it, for example, is a professional activity of a specialist, you are going to entrust their health, safety, money. To test the sincerity of the interlocutor try to keep the following tips in mind:

Fashionable word "transparency».

Now on TV and hear only about the "transparency of institutions", "budget transparency the company," etc. Transparency is important in personal relationships. No matter how tempting or seemed proposal if it makes you feel dull person that something back to wait on a decision recheck. Remember - your imagination is not reality, not the fact that everything is the way you want, and not the latter is a good offer, if at this time does not work, you're lucky later, but the risk - to lose a lot more
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Do not hesitate to ask about the details of proposals. If you are trying to get rid of the phrase "this is a professional subtleties, you do not understand them" - cheerleaders. It makes sense to use an independent expert.

The high level of morality.

Any relationship is better to build with a person with certain moral principles, at least in the area of ​​your interest. Because "lured" by the pharmaceutical company doctor, for which there are no moral standards, will prescribe you medicine for advertising which he was paid, even if it is not best suited for the treatment of your case is.

If the doctor does not write the recipe and give a handout or says that it is necessary to buy the medicine in a strict pharmacy - you better consult with another specialist

. A quirky car dealer for personal gain will try to sell you a frank "bucket on wheels", passing to foist a maximum of unnecessary options and devices. You can use a simple trick: tell me what you do not have enough money, but there is The old cars, which can be realized, getting the required amount, but it has a hidden defect that can significantly drop the cost of the machine. If you respond immediately, that this is not a problem that everybody does, that if the buyer does not make out the trick, then he is guilty - go to another shop or pre-purchase inspection to invite an experienced independent mechanic. The probability that you yourself find yourself in the role of the deceived buyer, is very high.

"The test for lice" can be carried out in any situation, the main thing is to evaluate the response rate. If a person is ready at once to cheat - his moral principles are not at that level, to build a serious relationship

. Correct goal.

When service is needed, it is necessary to make sure that you will have is it, rather than pursue their own goals at the expense of yours. For example, the physician should have a goal to cure your disease and not to collect material for a dissertation, and tailor - sew a perfectly fitting suit and not an exorbitant price to sell unsold cloth

. As a rule, can help here a simple conversation, it is better in an informal setting in which people reveal their plans, because it is in human nature - to talk about the importance for themselves. And as intelligent behavior. For example, the cost of the same fabric can be pre-clarified in the sewing shop and a doctor's career plans - in the reception clinic

. Beliefs stability.

Counting on serious or long-term relationship, it is wise to choose a partner who does not change the views, profession, aspirations, like Mary Poppins - with a change of wind. Of course, all people change with time, but when it happens regularly, spontaneous, chaotic and at the same time dramatically - there is a danger that, failing to proceed with the execution of the contract, the person will change his mind and will disappear from the horizon, well even if you do not grab your savings.

If you are going to trust someone with your values: money, health, family, not too lazy to bring about the pre-detailed reference person. You do not buy a kilo of apples at the market!

To lie or not to lie?

Most psychologists in their work say that the lion's share of problems in humans arises from the lies. Even "white lie", which seems necessary for total peace of mind, it is distorting the facts, people eventually forget about lying and can be caught at the wrong time.

If you go back to loving girl to make purchases from the beginning of the article, and it was an unpleasant story. Once she bought a pricey, but very beautiful suede boots that after the first exit (on corporate) treacherously went over the seam. And here she is also ill. In order not to miss the return of the warranty period of the goods, she asked her husband to take in the footwear shop, quite forgetting that the cost of boots called, is very different from the real. And in the store he immediately returned the money - by check. House was a scandal. But they finally understood the relationship and agreed to more than one friend not to lie. She then told me that she had not only become easier to live, but also to her husband opened completely on the other hand, their relationship became even more vivid than even during courtship.

Of course, absolutely honest and trusting relationship - it is very rare. But the truth of human situational display is not too difficult. Suffice it to skip the introductory talk and common phrases, waiting until he gets to the essence, to ask important questions. Not about the appearance and the possible defects. Not about the long-term work, and step by step procedure of compensation of possible marriage warranty. And do not be afraid to seem impolite. The extent to which people are willing to answer any question and is a measure of his sincerity, competence, morality, after all.
Author: Maria Kudryavtseva