15 "overheard" stories about that life - fun stuff

Every day happens to us a lot of events: Funny or not, funny or a little sad. There is even a special project that helps people to anonymously share their revelations.

< Website I have collected the funniest stories firsthand. We offer a short time to postpone the case and recharge your good mood right now.

My husband and I rarely drink alcohol. One evening, very much wanted to drink a bottle of Czech beer. The word "beer" we are always replaced by "brew" because of our 6-year-old daughter beer is associated with marginal personalities on the court, which has always cautiously get round. So we drink "kvas", the phone rings. My daughter is suitable: "Hello, hello, grannies! All is well! The parents? They're here, drink beer, and talk that kvass! "Curtain.
My grandmother got a new kind of identity (a plastic card with a photo and all information about the owner). Came today terribly annoyed, she said that the service centers all over her laughing. It turned out, my brother told her that now presenting a certificate to the Pension Fund, you must bring it to the face and say "Multipasport».
I sit, roar. My husband wipes away my tears. I thought it was so cute. I went over to the mirror ... and he told me wreathed mascara mustache pririsoval!
In the kitchen, the wife makes tea, and we and our dog next three. Suddenly she slips on the laminate and drops the empty cup. I pick up my wife and dog catches the cup teeth. Put the wife, the dog gave her a cup and handed me his paw. I gave it a "five", and we are proud to have gone.
A friend of mine once lost kitten in the apartment. Search all! The couch, behind the sofa, the balcony, the toilet in the bathroom, but all in vain ... And itch it to eat, opens the fridge, and there ... its a miracle sleeping peacefully on a pot of soup.
- descend on the elevator, airport taxi pulled up and had waiting. I understand that there is something wrong with the shoe - forgotten to insert them in the insole. I throw things into the car and back to the 20 th floor on a slow elevator - I want to have time to run back to the apartment and while the elevator is not gone, not to be stuck waiting for the elevator.
  The plan violates a girl standing on my floor. Ok, I ask her to wait just 15 seconds. It is with some kind of flirtatious smile agrees. I run for insoles and hear the elevator closes and leaves. I thought: Well, e-my, how can you then? I come back, and she is waiting for me with no lift.
  - One talked with my boyfriend who absolutely can not cook, so he did, if he had left with young children and without means of communication with the world, but a full fridge. For a long time thinking, he frantically grabbed me and said, "What, you can not throw a child! You can not leave them with me before they can eat hot dogs! »
  - Today I realized that I am a decent girl, when flying down the stairs in heels and shouted:" Oh-oh-oh! » Li >
    - Flew a few months ago from the United States to Moscow. Sitting in the economy, about the middle of the plane. Only gained altitude, I hear a light hum of voices on the rise. Then I clap on the shoulder: "Girl, pass the fare!" And the bill of $ 20. I'm doing the same thing with the passenger in front of me. In general, when the "twenty" rested against the wall, so to speak, after a moment's pause liner covered Homeric laughter. All have come up with two Russian guy in the gallery and seduced the whole plane!
    - My fiance (now husband) on our wedding day wrote on the sky lanterns, "Take me, I did not know». < /
      - I met once a son from school and see such a touching moment, as his classmate gets a pie, breaks in two and one part gives Yegor.
        I say the next day to his son: "Now you have to treat the girl and the wrong turns," give him a trifle on sweets, I go to school.
        In the evening, I ask:
        - Well, treated classmate?
        - No. Money given.
        
        For three days, my brother found the phone and puts me on the Service idiotic tunes. The day before yesterday woke up under the "Aka-47" yesterday under Valery Leontiev - "Augustine", and today by "natural blonde". I'm tired.
        
        Preparing dinner. I sent an urgent husband to the store (3 minutes walk from the house) for onions. He returned after 40 minutes and shouted from the doorway: "Honey, the bow was not there, I bought a dill!" I began to laugh, and he misunderstood: "I have something funny did?»
        On the train Voronezh - Moscow on the question of a passenger Wi-Fi in the train conductor said, "What are you, nothing can not be, the car twice daily disinfected!»
        archery. I leave as a boom in the country. I come back next week for them, and they were gone. I found in the garden, with tomatoes. It turned out they tie up tomatoes. Grandma ...
        
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