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5 psychological techniques, how to respond to "inconvenient" QUESTIONS
Several techniques that will help you to answer the most tricky questions and thus feel great.
"And how much do you earn?", "Why do not you want to have a second?" "When did you marry / get married?", "You are divorced, do you?" - Probably every one of us have ever provided in an awkward situation when a curious interlocutor wanted to get the information you want to share, and sorry about what direction to take this conversation.
We present a few strategies that will help you to answer the most tricky questions and thus feel great. If you follow our advice, you will not have to climb his words in a real situation.
1. Programmers and Sherlock Holmes recommend
Answering the tough questions, you have every right not to give the other party is no specific information. Behave as a programmer from a joke that got lost on the issue of Holmes and Watson, traveling by hot air balloon, he said is absolutely correct, but his words were not any good.
- Sir, you do not tell us where we are?
- The basket of the balloon, sir!
Or let common but also not too useful information.
- How much do you earn?
- How it all, the average salary in the industry (much less Abramovich).
2. "Mirroring»
"Returns" the interlocutor of his question. You can do this by using two simple techniques.
1) Formulate "asked" so that the person with whom you're talking, it became uncomfortable for your interest. Use universal design, which begins with the words "I understand correctly that ...", and its end will depend entirely on whether you continue to communicate whether you want to "build" their own personal boundaries, and so on. Etc .: "I understand correctly that you do not hold a candle off in my bedroom? "or" Do I understand correctly that your main problem today - it's my personal life? "or" Do I understand correctly that the interest in other people's troubles for you in the order of things ? '. Well, if you say it's all very polite, very calm, icy voice and become at the same gestures, except that is lifted an eyebrow in surprise.
2) "reinforce" the interest in a given topic, addressing the interlocutor another question from the same category:
- When you are about to give birth to a second?
- And you - the third?
3. "One-man show»
Hearing some unpleasant question, you can always imagine myself a great dramatic actress, penetrating look into the eyes of the other party, take a deep breath, pressed his hands to his chest (you can "break" his fingers), depict the abyss of despair and said in a tragic voice: "I beg you ! Never, do you hear me, never ask me about it! ».
The second option - you depicts a man giving a press conference (we will not name any specific names, but we recommend to pay attention to the first-tier government officials) and say the phrase: "Next question, please!". The third version - for fans of the series 'Univer'. Remember karate Edward Kuzmin (aka Kuzma) and say, "That's classified information!».
4. "I am - not boring, not boring, not boring!»
Instead of being offended, angry, or even somehow demonstrating that the question of the interlocutor hurt you, start a steady monotone answer. The most important thing - it's the details. Present the smallest details, and start very far away!
- When did you get married?
- Astrologers say that for the conclusion of a successful marriage requires that the lovers converge Ascendant (do not ask us what Ascendant and whether they should converge on the fact - good any abstruse theory, in which your counterpart is not too versed, though "zvezdogramma" though a sharp turn life line, though the index Nazdaka). And in that moment when I realize that I met my soul mate and score for each other, we (have to clarify where and when he was born), then say to him: "Yes." And not a minute earlier.
5. Mess, it's annoying!
- My God, how much you spent on that dress?
- I had to go hungry for two weeks, but that does not make for the sake of fashion!
Universal answers:
"I admire your ability to ask questions that baffled!" Or: "You - a delightful woman (wonderful man), you know that I am always amazed at you? It's your ability to ask invalid (complex, rhetorical) question! »
"I am pleased to answer your question, but first tell me why you are so much interested in?»
"And for what purpose you interested?»
"You really want to talk about it?". If you hear an affirmative "Yes" safely parry: "I - I do not want" - and smile.
If you no longer wish to have anything to do with the person who sets the tactless questions, you can afford a few more. For example, noted in response: "This is my damn business."
"And how much do you earn?", "Why do not you want to have a second?" "When did you marry / get married?", "You are divorced, do you?" - Probably every one of us have ever provided in an awkward situation when a curious interlocutor wanted to get the information you want to share, and sorry about what direction to take this conversation.
We present a few strategies that will help you to answer the most tricky questions and thus feel great. If you follow our advice, you will not have to climb his words in a real situation.
1. Programmers and Sherlock Holmes recommend
Answering the tough questions, you have every right not to give the other party is no specific information. Behave as a programmer from a joke that got lost on the issue of Holmes and Watson, traveling by hot air balloon, he said is absolutely correct, but his words were not any good.
- Sir, you do not tell us where we are?
- The basket of the balloon, sir!
Or let common but also not too useful information.
- How much do you earn?
- How it all, the average salary in the industry (much less Abramovich).
2. "Mirroring»
"Returns" the interlocutor of his question. You can do this by using two simple techniques.
1) Formulate "asked" so that the person with whom you're talking, it became uncomfortable for your interest. Use universal design, which begins with the words "I understand correctly that ...", and its end will depend entirely on whether you continue to communicate whether you want to "build" their own personal boundaries, and so on. Etc .: "I understand correctly that you do not hold a candle off in my bedroom? "or" Do I understand correctly that your main problem today - it's my personal life? "or" Do I understand correctly that the interest in other people's troubles for you in the order of things ? '. Well, if you say it's all very polite, very calm, icy voice and become at the same gestures, except that is lifted an eyebrow in surprise.
2) "reinforce" the interest in a given topic, addressing the interlocutor another question from the same category:
- When you are about to give birth to a second?
- And you - the third?
3. "One-man show»
Hearing some unpleasant question, you can always imagine myself a great dramatic actress, penetrating look into the eyes of the other party, take a deep breath, pressed his hands to his chest (you can "break" his fingers), depict the abyss of despair and said in a tragic voice: "I beg you ! Never, do you hear me, never ask me about it! ».
The second option - you depicts a man giving a press conference (we will not name any specific names, but we recommend to pay attention to the first-tier government officials) and say the phrase: "Next question, please!". The third version - for fans of the series 'Univer'. Remember karate Edward Kuzmin (aka Kuzma) and say, "That's classified information!».
4. "I am - not boring, not boring, not boring!»
Instead of being offended, angry, or even somehow demonstrating that the question of the interlocutor hurt you, start a steady monotone answer. The most important thing - it's the details. Present the smallest details, and start very far away!
- When did you get married?
- Astrologers say that for the conclusion of a successful marriage requires that the lovers converge Ascendant (do not ask us what Ascendant and whether they should converge on the fact - good any abstruse theory, in which your counterpart is not too versed, though "zvezdogramma" though a sharp turn life line, though the index Nazdaka). And in that moment when I realize that I met my soul mate and score for each other, we (have to clarify where and when he was born), then say to him: "Yes." And not a minute earlier.
5. Mess, it's annoying!
- My God, how much you spent on that dress?
- I had to go hungry for two weeks, but that does not make for the sake of fashion!
Universal answers:
"I admire your ability to ask questions that baffled!" Or: "You - a delightful woman (wonderful man), you know that I am always amazed at you? It's your ability to ask invalid (complex, rhetorical) question! »
"I am pleased to answer your question, but first tell me why you are so much interested in?»
"And for what purpose you interested?»
"You really want to talk about it?". If you hear an affirmative "Yes" safely parry: "I - I do not want" - and smile.
If you no longer wish to have anything to do with the person who sets the tactless questions, you can afford a few more. For example, noted in response: "This is my damn business."
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