KI Chukovskij Bashny.Net

My child is now at an age that he wanted to read books at night. And of course, the most widely read author of a KI Chukovsky. But as a child I had no idea that inflamed the imagination of children's writer is able to invent stories and phrases from which Stephen King is powerless grinds his teeth with envy. Take, for example, "The Stolen Sun»:
"Just goggle-eyed crabs
On the ground in the dark swarm, »

Well this is a thriller of some chesslovo. Personally, I seem to be quite dreadful shiny black monster three meters long, with eyes on stalks wiggling. Silently they sneak in the dark (note - not in the dark, and it was in the dark) to an unsuspecting victim hryas and half human! [NEXT]

"Yes, in a ravine behind the hill
Wolves howling mad. »

Yes Yes. It was rabid. With mad red eyes, with white foam on the bared fangs. Giving up on all the living nightmare with laughter ...

"And in the swamp Bear picks,
Cubs under driftwood looking for:
"Where are you, where are you gone?
Or fell into the ditch?
Or stray dogs
You broke into the darkness? & Quot;

Mad dogs, if someone does not understand - this is the best friend of rabid wolves. And they live in the same darkness in which crustaceans climb nightmarish monsters. But how can you assume about your own child, that he broke a dog? Or it is hopefully mean?

"Oh How It Hurts". The apotheosis of sadism and hatred for all living things. Even as a child, I have been puzzling phrase:
"My bunny, boy
I fell under a tram!
He ran down the path,
And he cut the legs, »
What could be on the tram track? !!! And now that the paths do not go, at any time, just because of the angle can jump tram killer and tries to cut off both his legs? I have five years of age almost dorozhkofobiya not developed ... But the continuation touches:
"And now he's sick and lame,
Small Zainka my! »
Yeah ... lame ... moms !!! It's in your legless !!!
Next - worse:
"And he said, Oh How It Hurts" It does not matter!
Give it a minute here!
I sew him a new leg, "

New leg, have you heard? That is old somewhere poher, lying on the tramways, to scare the hiccups old ladies. A Aibolit so easily out of the freezer and pulls the other leg sews. Coarse thread. Without anesthesia. Screaming, and bubbling over with blood from arteries pererublennyh zaychonku. And whose feet, I want to ask? We were from other patients who are less fortunate? How many corpses on your conscience, Doctor?
"He will run again, but the track & quot ;.
Presumably, before the next tram ...

"What? Is
Your children are sick? »
"Yes Yes Yes! They have a sore throat,
Scarlet fever, summer cholera,
Diphtheria, appendicitis,
Malaria and bronchitis! »
How good that Korney Ivanovich limited knowledge of medicine. And it would be of poor children nazarazhal so that they are easier to be killed out of pity. Although these diseases are sufficient to die in 24 hours ... One appendicitis is worth. Time does not remove - peritonitis and paragraph!

"Barmaley." Just one quote:
"But the villain Dr. Dolittle enough
And fire Aybolita throws.
And the lights, and shouts Aibolit:
"Oh, it hurts! Oh, it hurts! Oh, it hurts! & Quot;

Jeanne d'Arc and Giordano Bruno is dedicated ... The stench of singed hair, crackling bursting of the skin, the hissing of boiling fat. Hands and feet are usually burn to the bone. Unconsciousness of shock does not occur for a long time. Usually burned before choking in the smoke ...

Aibolit - favorite hero stories Chukovsky. That's what's going on in the picture apokalepticheskaya door of his home:
"And there, on the doorstep, miserable crowd:
Blind ducks and squirrels legless,
Thin frog with a sick stomach,
Speckled cuckoo with a broken wing
And hares, wolves bitten. »
Blind ducklings apparently led legless proteins ... hares, wolves bitten: fragments of bone sticking out of open fractures, partially scalped carcasses, dragging the grass guts smeared in blood and feces ...

There is this author's verse that could not write at all. Leave only the title. It is in itself a stroke of genius: "Hedgehogs are laughing" (Hy-hy-hy ... Be More napasik ...)
Another title: "Fly in the bath." Surely a misprint. It should be: "Muhahahaha bath» ...

On the dangers of hard drugs tells us the poem "Glutton»:
"I had a sister,
She sat by the fire
And a large sturgeon caught in the fire.
But there was osetёr
Cunning
And once again plunged into the fire. »
I certainly sturgeon from the fire did not compete, but the Black man in the apartment one night saw. This, I assure you, will be terrible.

Now, a small test. I do not know what guided korney chukovsky when picking up the rhyme, but when I read aloud a portion of the poem "Phone", the wife somehow always laughs ... Yes, and I find it difficult to read correctly. And now you try to substitute the correct word in the gaps (best read aloud):
"Recently, two gazelles
We called and sang:
 - Is
In fact
All burned
Carousel?

 - Ah, the mind you, a gazelle?
Do not burn the carousel,
And swing survived!
You used, gazelles, not __________,
And next week
Rode to and sat
On carrousels! »

And what happened? I have the same ...

"Cockroach" ... A Tale of dominance insectoid, which were founded upon the authors of the film "Starship Troopers." In the first lines we meet guess who? Do not guess.
"And behind them crabs
In a lame dog. »
Interestingly, it is the same cancers and the dog, who "Stolen Sun" were accomplices of the world's evil, crawled in darkness and torn teddy bears?

"Wolves fright
Eat each other. »
I remember as a child painfully tried to imagine this picture. I even remember schematically Kushan each other wolves to understand how this is possible. It gets something resembling Ouroboros. And because the action is completed, "we eat." That is nothing left. Where are the wolves eat? !!! It's some space mikrokollaps occurred and they skhopnulis to another reality?
Well, this puzzle will leave physicists. But let me answer the psychiatrists - it's rare disorder - from fear to eat next, who to you to be? After all,
"Poor crocodile
Toad swallowed. »
(crocodile poor ... yeah. And I suppose the toad of happiness lit alive digested in the stomach acid ...)
"And the elephant, trembling,
And I sat on the hedgehog. »
Do you feel sorry for the elephant? Now I was sorry. It also hurts to sit on a hedgehog was ... And only now I realize that it is necessary to regret not nifiga elephant hedgehog ... SOMETHING kabzdets COME !!! His flattened fuck !!! 6 tons of meat on the bone and the animal the size of a cat ... There was nothing ... to bury his wife and children have nowhere to lay flowers ... All that was left of the poor hedgehog stuck to the elephant and ass obtrusilos ten steps. And you say ... And how stupid is the inscription on the gravestone - "the elephant crushed shaking ass» ...
By the way, this is the elephant in the poem caused another death. Equally absurd and tragic. And again, for the simple reason that she was unable to control his own emotions:
"And the elephant-dressed girl
So famously danced,
What ruddy moon
The sky shivered
And the poor elephant
I fell head over heels. »
I want to ignore the fact that fell on the earth the moon destroy all living things for millions of years ... Let it be just an elephant ...

Returning to Dolittle. Remember, I had a suspicion that Aibolit contains illegal organ bank. This suspicion is growing only after reading "Toptygin and Fox." We can even learn a little who was the donor criminal doctor:
"He laughed good
Dr. Aibolit.
Silly Bear
The doctor says:

"Okay, okay, dear, I'm ready.
I want much tails.
There are goat, there are horse,
There donkey, long, long.
I tell you, an orphan, serve:
At least four of the tail tie ... & quot;

Bear began to try tails,
Bear began to walk in front of the mirror:
That cat, the dog puts
Yes on Lisonku side glances. & Quot;

Draw your own conclusions ...
In verses Chukovskiy often appear villains. And what is the easiest way to defeat the villain? Brought up in the Hollywood blockbuster generation chorus shouts: "Watering Kazlų !!!" But long before Hollywood, this method of victory of good over evil preached KI Chukovsky. Moreover, with a bias in cannibalism.
Recalls Barmaley crocodile devoured. Crocodile in turn is broken bear. Spider-old man beheaded marauder-mosquito. Cockroach alive swallowed a sparrow.
Do you still believe that books Chukovskiy teach good?

 - © yuhivoznaitskopipastil





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