Anecdotes on the evening

- I see you're getting fat! Caviar on the table!
 - So after all eggplant!
 - So after the bucket!

Sit for a beer and the Basque Galkin. Basque asks:
 - But, Max, you'll be able to Montserrat Caballe ?!
 - Well, if you ... in the dark and after a liter of vodka ...!
 - I mean - to portray!

The teacher comes to class, looking at, the entire board is drawn huge dick.
 - Who painted?
All are silent, Little Johnny gets up and says:
 - Well, I painted.
The teacher sends everyone in the class, leaving only Vovochku. Children waiting for 10 minutes 20 ... No one comes out, takes an hour out of class Vovochka, fastened on track pants and says:
 - That's the main thing - advertising!

He came to work the new boss and a secretary from the old, and the head, critically examining secretary, giving her instructions:
 - Shorter skirts, fishnet stockings, deep neckline.
The secretary, looking up from his notebook, curiously asks:
 - A sprinkle with salt nipples? The former head of the beer is very loved.

Moscow - hamaslennitsa.

Petka:
 - Vasily Ivanovich, Anka gonorrhea caught!
 - Gonorrhea shot, Anka to present the award.

 - Something we have recently become a chef feisty like a dog!
 - Yes, I'm on March 8 gave his wife a rolling pin, and mother-in-pan!