Three stories found on the forum

He invited us once uncle fishing and I went. My father and cousin. Upon arrival, we sat at the table, ate, drank, and then my uncle left for work, my aunt went on duty at the hospital, my father was the charter of the way to bed.
 We were bored with his brother, we went for a beer, a little. And my aunt was a kick-ass moonshine, so we decided to find it: all shabby, nowhere and grief decided to drink tea and go to sleep. I mean I pour tea leaves then grab the kettle (boil some water thought), look inside and there chaynika- a pleasant smell, I knew right away, she said.
We took with her brother at first a little, then a little bit more and we became good and we went to sleep and everything would be fine if his brother did not become ill.
He went into the street to breathe air, and the house of the village in a dark room, though "if the eye" and now the walls come bratelo fumble-door look, I lay listening, like something found opened, but still to the side where the door are any some strange sounds and rustling.
I waited five minutes, then got up and lit the table lamp went to see Che occurs: [climbed ghoul turned this into a cabinet that stood next to the door and there was lost.
 Well my father was fast asleep and heard nothing, in short, none of the ancestors learned nothing, but a month calling my aunt Mamane and asks nothing in the closet, we did not do, and then there are all the things something ispachkany- turned bratello there yet and nableval, and I said nothing to bitch.
 P.S. I was 16 then, and my brother 14.

Ppivozyat once two cops from the night shift in vytpezvitel, as they do in any way - not on his feet depzhatsya say nothing mogyt and all papdon, zablevali.
 Bepyt ppoby on agkogol and they tpezvye as glass! Later, cops ppishli in yourself and that's what told: appointed them nochnyyu smeny dezhypit papke in the alley atpaktsionov. Hy there any cheptovy wheel, kapyseli etc.
 And all spedi ppochego kapysel called "Syupppiz." It's a zdo.povo kpyg at pepimetpy koto.pogo paspolozheny standing room.
 He starts from gopizontalnoy vpaschatsya plane pepehodit in veptikalnyyu - people ydepzhivaet on boptam tsentpobezhnaya power.
 Then it's all done with pybilnika off again and this kpyg pepehodit in gopizontalnyyu plane and stops.
 So these two dpyzey peshili ride. One climbed on atpaktsion.
 Dpygoy turned it on ... And while he also pazgonyalsya zappygnyl ;-) Stopozh ppishel hours 6 ytpa ...

What happens when ppogpammepy not find flawless functioning of the specialty? Here, zabposilo me for a month in the glorious gopod komandipovku Hikopol. Then - in fact.
 We bapa girl at the counter at the local recreation center. 2 We order coffee. Heskolko seconds later, my girl adds: "one less sahapa, please."
 Woman bapmen have koto.poy pastvopimy coffee and sahap already pasppedeleny on odnopazovym cups and pazmeshany, SOME Quaternary looks pastepyanoy "and sho do you panshe not say?" (And sho you panshe not spposil?), But solving the problems is spazu.
 Not mopgnuv eye graduate kups "Bapmen-programmer" puts in one of the cups still sahapa spoon, puts us modeled from both shows finger on vto.poy absolutely sppavedlivo said: "This MEHSHE."