Two istoriyki

Friend is in the vicinity of Moscow and voting, stopaet foreign car with a person of Caucasian nationality driving. They're coming. Fast. Policeman stops. I drove out. What a long time talking to the representative of the law. He takes the rights registration certificate and a cloud of God knows no papers. After about 10-15 minutes of conversation ends with prosaic - drove extracted from purses purse ...
 Flops person behind the wheel and drives sharply to Moscow. Forty meters gives a monologue:
 - Damn. Kretyn. Lymyta. The passport is not my picture. In the name of someone else's rights. The power of attorney expired. The machine in the hijacking. But he stuck - there is a passenger registration or not. Kretyn.

He told one friend hunter. His godfather, the same avid hunter as he was, four years ago with friends bought a license for deer. How are they hunted - not the point. The meat was shared fairly and godfather got back in the bargain, and the horns. Good are the horns, the deer was eleven years old. So he brought the horns in the proper form, I do not know what's being done to them can reveal the varnish - it does not matter. He stuck the horns on a board and hung in the most conspicuous place.
 Came to him one (also natural hunter) and saw the horns, proudly declares:
 - And I, John, the horns are something more.
 What godfather, not a loss, it responds:
 - So you Well, Vanya, my younger wife.