After the divorce, I became a completely different person, I didn’t think I could do that before.

If divorceeUsually there are all sorts of rumors about her. From friends, from work colleagues. Sometimes from friends and girlfriends. How it happened, who is to blame, what will happen now and so on. In general, it is not that this is the norm, but we, people, have become accustomed to this state of affairs. Gossip and fiction somehow entertain and give life some interest. But if you think about it, it's not good enough.



In most cases, people are used to pitying a woman in a divorce. A man, after the end of marriage, for some reason we most often associate with a reveler, a drunkard, a liar or something worse. Surely he hurt his wife, didn't look after the kids and did whatever he wanted. And now, justice has been done. Therefore, in most cases, the children remain with the mother. But in life, as we know, not everything is so clear.

When you get married for love, the information flows around you become a little strange. I am a woman and the modern agenda says that I should be dependent on my husband, obey and indulge him in everything. On the other hand, I also have to be a bitch and sit around his neck. Taking paychecks, whining and always demanding more. Only then will my husband (although in this context he is more like a slave to me) grow up in the career ladder. This is what female counselors and “advanced” psychologists think. And I have to listen to them because I'm a woman.

At this point, many readers may disagree with me. It’s all about the internet you’re listening to. But statistically, I want to tell you, all these new-fangled nonsense work very well and they have a lot of followers. So don’t be surprised at the significant social change that will happen in 5 years. I warned you.

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As for me, at the beginning of my marriage, I was very positive and confident that my family would be built on trust, progress and great, great love. My parents helped me financially and also gave me an excellent education and upbringing. With Dima, we started our family life not like most, in a rented apartment. It's mine, the two-bedroom. Renovated and in a nice neighborhood. For the start was everything that the soul wants. So I felt happy.

We both got ourselves a good job. It's a pity that we just had some minor inconsistencies on schedule. And when I was free, Dima worked. Conversely, when I was working, he had a break. It's okay, I thought. We're just gonna be friends. Everyone knows that when a spouse sees each other all day at work, they have problems at home. Seeing something good even in a not-so-pleasant situation is my approach to literally everything. Why be sad when you can set yourself up correctly?



However, now, 5 years after the wedding and 2 months after the divorce, I have become a completely different person. I became tougher, more serious and more sarcastic. Perhaps some percentage can be attributed to age. Well, something, of course, came with a promotion at work. You can’t be nice to your subordinates 100% of the time, otherwise they’ll quickly get on your neck. It's not their fault, it's not mine, it's just the way a man is made. He always wants more freedom.

So my ex-husband also at some point decided that I alone for such a loving man will not be enough. And so I decided to hit on my colleague from the office. At first, he himself hoped that it would be a normal affair, but then the matter began to take a serious turn. So Dima was balancing on the edge, between me and his mistress. When he told me this, I remembered that yes, in the third year of our life together, I really began to notice how he began to lose weight rapidly and became somehow nervous, anxious.

But I was a good wife. I had some opportunities because I worked hard and hard. So I decided to give my beloved a gift. Go on vacation, to the sea. All on my account: accommodation, food, some entertainment. He just had to be there and be in a good mood. Holidays together, I thought, would solve a lot of our problems. We are still young and full of strength. We have a lot more interesting things in the future! Oh, naive stupid girl.



Peels I didn’t even suspect anything when I noticed that my wife is constantly being pointed at the phone. I thought they were disturbing at work. A wonderful worker like my husband should be cherished and cherished by his superiors! I'm sure he's got everything on him. But it wasn't. My “competitor” just lost her period. And she was very nervous about it. As it turns out, it's not for nothing. But I found out much later. At the end of his marriage.

When Dima and I were apart, he told me a lot. You can't write anything here. Besides, some details aren't for other people's ears, I think. What happened to all this nonsense and how do I live now? Well, I can talk about this, and at the same time share with you my thoughts, what views I had after I learned about the life of my husband on the side.



Peels In general, I got angrier. To everyone at once, it was a significant change. Otherwise, if the attitude changed only to the ex-husband, it would be a simple offense. I am more critical of my staff and staff. I don’t talk to people I don’t know and I don’t agree with any of the things my parents say. Sometimes I find myself thinking that in one situation or another I could be gentler. But this is already ingrained in the subcortex, and probably only a good specialist in psychology can change me.

Maybe this is just a continuation of what I said above, but the divorce with Dmitry was also not easy. I didn't give him anything or give it away. I found the most callous and unscrupulous, albeit expensive, lawyer. He was digging into every little thing, every millimeter of our lives. Dima even left me a few messages on the phone, asking me to be softer, he has a child and needs money. I used to call myself a bad person and in general, an unprintable word. Now I think differently.

It seems to me that Diminom’s child could not be harmed by his father’s love. Otherwise, his father has nothing else. At home, we lived with me, we bought a folding car, and now I bought it for a third of the starting price. Dmitry still has a job, but when he has a child and his wife has never worked, the salary should be much higher than my ex-husband now has. At least according to his past words. Well, let him go second.



As for me, I said goodbye to many of my former friends. And with some in general correspondence on the Internet. Why? They kept trying to make me feel guilty. That I am so cruel to my ex-husband. That I was robbing his child of money. And so they have to support him. I don't need passengers like that. Let them stay in the past. With my next husband, I will probably make a prenuptial agreement. And we'll arrange for all those moments on the beach before the wedding. If you want to accept it, you don't. There is no desire to waste your life on another person. Now is the time to live in joy alone.