All my life I was just a staff for children, but now they suddenly remembered me.

The slogan of youth in all ages has been:live once! It is understandable when there is a lot of time and effort, when life is not so disappointing, you want to enjoy it fully. That’s why the entertainment industry works for them. Of course, there are options for the older generation, but for those who are over 40 it is difficult to have fun with friends all night long: children, work responsibility. In fact, health is not what it used to be.



Therefore, in society, it is customary to treat high-aged revelers with a small (and perhaps large) misunderstanding. What's going on? Is it the case when an adult man or woman lives for pleasure? There is nothing to do, so read the book! Is that fair? It's a rhetorical question. Everyone has their own views on life. We are not used to judging someone.

Until the age of 48, I had no idea how other people could live in another country and with different views on life. Absolutely different from mine. The thing is, the girl from the downtrodden village is not told about it, only on the contrary, rubbed into her ears all sorts of nonsense about consciousness, some kind of duty that I was probably born with. And how important it is to be a loving and uncomplaining wife, whatever it costs you.

When I got married at 19, I knew my destiny. Children, home, cooking, washing, ironing and, preferably, no ambition. Except in the summer, when you can still work on the ground so that each new harvest is richer than the previous one. Does that ring a bell? This is the real propaganda of “a better life later, just now you need to be patient.” But so did my mother and my grandmother. Work while you're alive. You'll rest in the afterlife.



At the age of 20, my husband and I had our first child, and a year later my daughter arrived. Since then, I have ceased to be my husband’s wife, since he did not want any more children. Since then, I have become a maid and a worker without pay. He didn't even ask me to love the kids. Treat them as you like, the main thing is to grow up. They will be able to help with the household themselves. Now I'm asking myself, what the hell is this all about, what is the ultimate purpose of this life? In the past, it was a common scenario that everyone seemed to live by.

The husband repaired the equipment he could, and for this he received his salary. Of course, I had no money. And although Sergey’s work was not to say that it was very difficult physically, when he came home he did nothing at all. Only in extreme cases, if I just physically couldn’t complete a task, did I make some appearance. But to come late after a drink with friends after work - he could afford it, of course. Perhaps that is why he lived such a short life: after forty, the whole house and house were on me.



I tried to find another man to be economical and to be normal as a person. But I had some bad luck. I understand that not all men drink slackers, but I have come across just such. At least the children have grown up and left to study in another city. I knew that after village school, the chances of them getting rich were slim, but there was nothing else I could offer them. What do you want from a village woman? Not a penny in my pocket.

And then Lida, one of my few friends, suggested that I look at life from the other side, spend some time raising money and learning the language. And then go to work abroad. She doesn't have children, and I've grown up. So we're both risking nothing. After a little thought, I agreed, although in school in German I had a solid three. But what to do, if you want to live, know how to spin. And after spending about three years on this, Lida and I left in search of a better life.



There was a lot on my way: new people, a new place, acclimatization. But, believe me, compared to what I had experienced before, it was not that difficult. At least physically. But morally, at some point, I had a great time. The children asked me to come and help them with their problems, to help them raise their grandchildren. But something made me stay here, away from my old routine. I found myself a new man, a great place to live and life finally started to play with new colors.

I've never driven. My husband, even in a good mood, wouldn’t let me in. I can ride a motorcycle now. I didn’t even think about going to sea before. Now it is easier for me to swim in the pool, although it is only half an hour walk to the coast. But why? I can sunbathe at home. Food? In a year, I gained 10 pounds on cheap and tasty foods. Including the sea. It’s good that over the next year I managed to lose weight by 15, eating normally and working with a coach.

I no longer need to think about the fact that clothes need to be protected, the floors cleaned every day, and in the morning cook a huge pot of something edible, so that the whole family can eat it before it has time to spoil. Modern technology, normal prices and a confident view of things deprived me of these problems. I remember dressing as well as I could for the holidays. We saw relatives of my husband, some fellow villagers, wrapped in everything deeply hidden in their huge closets. How else?



Peels Now I understand what nonsense this is. Things can be thrown away if they are fashionable. And you should not be afraid of them: they are just rags. I used to see young people with pierced navels on TV, and I myself denounced even ordinary women with earrings in their ears. And a year ago I got a tattoo. A small one, on the arm. But now it's not taboo for me. And judging someone I consider a bad upbringing. Want some? Do it. Just don't bother anyone.

Lida and I live in different cities, but we communicate from time to time. She has children, so she has a life of her own. My heiresses can't calm down. They need help for their children, a cook, a cleaner, which is not on this list. You don't need your mom. You can see it from our conversations, so I'm not making it up, understand me. I thought I'd start sending them some money, but the appetites of the kids were just growing, and I stopped the practice.



I know that in old age, no one will give me a glass of water. But now the times are different. When I get old, my children will be raising their grandchildren themselves, they will not be up to me. He died like my husband before he was 50. And children could be a real support. The times are different. And we meet old age alone. Selfish? I guess. But it's also true. I made my choice. So anyone can judge me, I don't care. You're just going to live like I've lived most of my life. And then we'll talk. All the best and a pleasant mood, Ciao!