My mother-in-law told me straight to my face that I was a dowry, I cried for a few nights, but eventually I realized something.

You can argue for a long time about how to create a family. Should both spouses work, should the daughter-in-law call her mother-in-law mother, and more importantly - a wedding with a dowry of the bride or just love is enough, and everything will somehow add up? The truth is always somewhere in the middle.



A few years ago I was asked to marry a loved one. It was my first relationship and I knew it was forever. I was 19, Anton was 24. He had just graduated from university and almost immediately joined a prestigious company.

He is from a simple family, but his parents have good connections. They helped him find a job, and then they gave us the down payment on the mortgage. And we already had our own little cozy two-piece.



I grew up in a village where my mother and younger sister stayed. We lived without a father and left when my sister and I were very young. I moved to the city, went to pedagogy and settled in a dormitory. Money was always close, I took any part-time job. Sometimes she handed out leaflets, sometimes wrote coursework to classmates. Sending money to the family.

We met our loved ones, like so many people. He wrote me first on social media. Very romantic courting, turned his head. And then he asked me to move out of the dorm. I got pregnant. When we were two months old, we decided to get married. Of course, everything was modest, because my husband received very little money, and I left the university and did not work. My husband's parents paid for it. Dowry wedding? Not me.



Strict lesson mother-in-law With mother-in-law at first was easy and soulful as at home. I almost immediately started calling her mom, and she surrounded me pregnant with love and care. I was dressed, shoeed, fed delicious. I didn't need anything at all. And then a son was born.



Recently, my Kostic turned 3 years old. I wanted so much to please the baby and arrange for him an extraordinary holiday. I've done my job very carefully. I bought a lot of decorations and ordered a large cake from a famous local pastry chef. I took a photo zone and invited a photographer. She laid a large table and called all close relatives and friends of the family. Yes, this holiday cost a lot, but it was all for Kostic!



When my mother-in-law came, I immediately knew from her sour face that she was in no mood. At the party she was polite and calm, but I felt something was wrong. When I went to the kitchen to bring plates, she followed me. Then I asked her what was going on? I didn’t want to make a fuss, but why spoil the whole holiday? But what she said made me shut my mouth. I certainly didn't expect to hear that.



Antosha works all day to provide for you and Kostic. And you're spending a lot of money on a party for a 3-year-old who won't even remember him. And besides, Anton has been wearing the same shirt for a week, undressed. And they don't feed him at home, so he comes to me at night, didn't you know? I don't know what you've been doing all day since your own husband's not here. Only you know what to spend his money, and you yourself are a squat and bait and should pray for us that we accepted you into the family!

We had a big fight, of course. After a while, my mother-in-law came to apologize. I was very upset, but you know, her words opened my eyes. I looked at my situation differently. I live in my husband's apartment, I don't work. Anton pays a mortgage and works from morning to evening. I don’t even have a higher education.



After that evening, the words of my mother-in-law sounded in my head for a long time, I cried all night. A little later I decided to look for a job. Recovered in pedagogy. A lot of twisted-turned in the soul after that conversation, but since then my mother-in-law is no longer called mother.

Help me to judge who in this story did the wrong thing and how could you soften the sharp corners?