20
What feelings are like love
What does true love look like? Even those who have been in a relationship or marriage for a long time. Do you want to know if it’s a ceiling or something more? Some are quite happy with the state of things. Most often, women, sensitive romantic natures torture themselves with such thoughts.
In ancient times, the concept of love did not figure, people married to preserve their position in society and property in the family circle. Today, women have an infinite number of opportunities to find a like-minded person, friend, lover, husband.
Each partner has positive and negative traits, you can put up with them, and you can find someone better. This search will not end if you do not know what exactly you expect from a relationship. Then comes the strange question: “Do I really love this man?”
Family psychologist Alexander Shakhov will immediately answer that he does not like: “When you love, such questions do not arise.” But psychologists come not for judgment, but for an answer, and to understand, you need to understand what that very love consists of.
American psychologist Robert Sternberg put forward the theory of love in 1986. In his opinion, love consists of three components: passion, intimacy, commitment. If there are no such things, there is no love.
If one of the components is missing, the couple will be able to stay in a long-term relationship, but will experience discomfort. If there are no two components, the relationship is doomed to failure. This does not mean that love can be one and only, its types are different ratios of fundamental components. Here. what loveAccording to Robert Stenberg.
Forms of love
To understand how much you love your partner, Alexander Shakhov offers to take a small test. Answer 3 questions honestly on a ten-point scale, then sum up the points and see the answers below.
Alexander Shakhov Test
Findings
In what actions does love manifest itself?: in serenading under the window or numerous promises? Genuine care and mutual trust are much more valuable, right?
In ancient times, the concept of love did not figure, people married to preserve their position in society and property in the family circle. Today, women have an infinite number of opportunities to find a like-minded person, friend, lover, husband.
Each partner has positive and negative traits, you can put up with them, and you can find someone better. This search will not end if you do not know what exactly you expect from a relationship. Then comes the strange question: “Do I really love this man?”
Family psychologist Alexander Shakhov will immediately answer that he does not like: “When you love, such questions do not arise.” But psychologists come not for judgment, but for an answer, and to understand, you need to understand what that very love consists of.
American psychologist Robert Sternberg put forward the theory of love in 1986. In his opinion, love consists of three components: passion, intimacy, commitment. If there are no such things, there is no love.
If one of the components is missing, the couple will be able to stay in a long-term relationship, but will experience discomfort. If there are no two components, the relationship is doomed to failure. This does not mean that love can be one and only, its types are different ratios of fundamental components. Here. what loveAccording to Robert Stenberg.
Forms of love
- Friendship consists of close trusting relationships in which there is no place for passion, people do not owe anything to each other.
- Romantic love is based on mutual attraction to each other, over time, intimacy appears. If after a while people do not dare to strengthen their relationship with mutual obligations, over time, the love passes.
- Stupid love occurs when there is no trusting relationship. All that remains is the commitment accumulated over time and the senseless passion.
- Blind love is based on a strong attraction to each other, excluding close trusting relationships.
- Friendly love is found in people who have been married for a long time. These people are attached to each other, have sincere respect and share common responsibilities with their partner.
- Empty love means that there is no place for passion and intimacy in your relationship. You are bound by obligations, and this is often the case in marriages of convenience. It happens that in such families empty love turns into friendship.
- Perfect love is the form of love that everyone strives for. This is a happy relationship between really close people. Such couples do not represent each other with someone else, overcome life difficulties together.
To understand how much you love your partner, Alexander Shakhov offers to take a small test. Answer 3 questions honestly on a ten-point scale, then sum up the points and see the answers below.
Alexander Shakhov Test
- You feel complete physical and emotional security with this person, believe that he is honest with you in everything and fulfills his obligations to you.
- You share your positive and negative experiences with your partner with the confidence that they will understand and listen to you. You feel very close to this person.
- You are genuinely interested in your partner’s feelings and thoughts. You're interested in making plans for the future. This person is comfortable and silent, and talk.
Findings
- 26-30
You are truly loving and happy in this relationship. Try to keep all three components of love in harmony. - 21-25
This relationship is satisfying, but you want something more. Maybe you're expecting something from a satellite. In order to strengthen the relationship, you need to understand your aspirations and requirements for your loved one, then together you can build a strong indestructible relationship. - 15-20
You are not happy with your current relationship, your partner is often annoying. If you are constantly asking yourself whether the beginning of a relationship with this person was a mistake, first deal with your relationship with your partner. If a person is dear to you, there is a chance to save the relationship by joint efforts. - 10-14
This relationship is on the edge. You often argue and don’t trust each other. In this case, you can contact a family psychologist, perhaps you need to pause in the relationship. - 0-9
You can't call it love. Rethink your outlook on life, your aspirations, maybe it's time to say goodbye to this person so everyone gets better. It will not be superfluous to contact a psychologist.
In what actions does love manifest itself?: in serenading under the window or numerous promises? Genuine care and mutual trust are much more valuable, right?