How to establish a relationship with the spouse’s parents Bashny.Net

Even in a couple where a man and a woman feel made for each other, discord can occur with active interference in the relationship of other relatives. After all, it often happens that the parents of the partner are intolerable people, and building a dialogue with them seems torture.

And today's edition. "Site" They ask what to do if relations with the spouse's relatives They don't add up. Is it possible to save the family or will it be necessary to go to extreme measures?





We live with our spouse for the 5th year in complete harmony. But I can't call the relationship perfect, because of his parents. They are old-fashioned people with their cockroaches in their heads. It seems that non-conflict, but always dissatisfied with everything, will never support, will not praise. They discuss any small thing and whisper behind their backs, says 23-year-old Elena.

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“I am no longer surprised when they don’t like the taste of candy just because I bought it. Such absurd situations happen every time we visit. I feel uncomfortable and lonely at times like this. And the husband is silent.

“I understand that a husband does not want to offend his mother and father, that he accepts them as they are. But when I see how well they get along, I get the same irritation for him. They even think about divorce, so as not to see those always dissatisfied faces. And if it's so bad, maybe our marriage is a mistake?





In this case, I just want to be glad that Elena and her husband do not live under the same roof as his parents, but only see occasionally. And although a woman idealizes her relationship with her husband and tries to be one with him, in reality everything is different. This is normal because everyone is different.

We may not like some trait of a loved one, his hobbies or habits. We may not like one of his relatives. This happens all the time, and trying to escape from this by divorce is wrong, because in a new relationship will necessarily appear their own problems, which will also have to either fight or put up with.





“Before thinking about divorce, Elena should examine the hateful traits of her husband when he finds himself in the company of his parents. Surely a woman is hurt by the fact that she is defenseless in front of dissatisfied relatives, and her beloved husband is not in a hurry to protect her, says psychotherapist Natalia Tonkikh.

“It hurts so much that sometimes you want to get divorced if you can’t get used to it. But the husband probably has to put up with traits that he does not like in the woman he loves. After all, it is in mutual compromises that family happiness is hidden. There will be no mutual concessions - quarrels will begin that will not bring anything good, the expert predicts.





The husband’s family is his wife’s second family. But not everyone has a good relationship. Perhaps the woman hoped that family Her husband can give her the warmth she lacked from her parents. But to rely on it is reckless.





Or maybe Elena thought she and her husband were too similar. Being different is normal, even for a couple of loving people. And accepting these differences is one of the hardest things to go through in a relationship.