Why do women feel sorry for raising mother’s sons? Bashny.Net

When fiancee Getting acquainted is an important point. After all, this is not only acquaintance and discussion of the future wedding, but also the beginning of the unification of families. And if the acquaintance goes smoothly, then in the future relations between members of such a united family are more likely to be good. And if you already know each other, then what to expect in the future?



My husband and I are over 50, but with our own housing did not work. We live in a two-bedroom apartment, but in addition to me and my son, my husband’s parents also live here. I didn’t have a relationship with them from the beginning. That's why we don't communicate. It happens. We live under the same roof, but we don't talk, Tamara writes.



“At first we tried to change something. The husband offered his parents to change the apartment, but they refused. At first, they said that they would not find anything in such a good neighborhood for this money. Then other reasons came up. And then we put a point – this is our apartment, we will not sell it. If you don't like it, leave. There was nowhere to go and we stayed. Get used to it. I did not expect anything to change.”

“Our son was most concerned about this. He's 26 now, a grown boy. But how can he arrange his personal life in such conditions? He dated one girl for more than a year, but they broke up because he couldn’t even invite her home. She decided that something was wrong with him and stopped communicating, found another”.



“Now he is in a relationship with a beautiful girl. Her name is Nastya, she is from another city, and came to our school. Moreover, her parents already in the second year bought her an apartment so that she did not move from one rented apartment to another, but could focus on her studies.”

“Soon, the relationship of the children reached a serious level. We had to meet Nastya's parents, but we didn't know how to do it better. My husband's parents and I have a strained relationship. The apartment has not been renovated since I moved. Everyone thought it was not their concern.”

“You will not meet future matchmakers in neutral territory. What will they think of us? And if you meet in someone else's apartment, then the truth will also surface over time. Let them know at once what is what.”



When they crossed the threshold of our apartment, the disappointment on their faces was impossible not to see. At the table, Nastya's father immediately stated that they would not give up their daughter to marry our son. He said his daughter could not be supported by a man who had nowhere to live.”

We, in turn, suggested that children can live separately, because Nastya has an apartment. My husband and I will help them with money or whatever we can. The man replied that such handouts to his daughter do not need. My husband and I didn’t even know what to say. Nothing seemed to work.”



“When I went into the kitchen, Nastya’s mother, who had been silent all this time, followed me. She immediately tried to calm me down and asked me not to be offended by her husband’s harsh tone. The main thing is that our children love each other. The conditions in which we live today are not terrible.

“It turned out that Nastya’s parents had once been in a similar situation. So 11 years ago, a woman decided to go abroad to work. So I earned first for an apartment with my husband, and then I was able to buy an apartment and daughter.

The future matchmaker said that after a month and a half she was going back to Italy, where she was caring for an elderly woman. I offered to go with her, promised me to find a similar option in the neighborhood.

“And I was really thinking. Maybe we should really go. It's a pity I'll have to quit my job here. On the other hand, you won’t make much money in our city, and you can bring some money from abroad. There will be help to the son so that he is not reproached with other people's square meters, the woman reflects.



It is hoped that the parents of the bride and groom find common ground Together they will change the situation for the better. It is not clear why the financial burden in both cases falls on the shoulders of women. With this approach, Nastya will soon have to go to work to feed her young family. An alarming trend, isn't it?