When I met my future wife, she's not interested in me, unlike her friends. But when we began to interact more closely, I suddenly realized what she really wonderful and as cleverly concealed in the first meeting.
Honestly, I can't even remember a time when we were introduced — so it seemed to me uninteresting and invisible. But just a couple of months I came up with a thousand absurd reasons just to see her, that this "my" in all senses of man.
It so happened that in our relationship, first impression, first, were false, and secondly, did not play the slightest role. I don't even remember — it happened, strange as it sounds, much later.
In our culture we place undue responsibility on first impression. But is it so important?
If we are talking about the interview or any competition is undoubtedly plays a key role. Without it there really is nothing: it is part of the job and further interaction without a positive self-presentation is not expected.
But the first impression, say, in a new class or group of friends is a little different. Because the reality is very conditional and depends on the situation, time, environment and other things. Simply put, you can see a man in unaccustomed terms, and to make of it a false impression. Or Vice versa — to see in the ideal, but in ordinary life, he will be calm, maybe even boring and uninteresting.In the end, time, environment and context —thethree main factors on which we put the impression about the person. And these factors are constantly changing, what you need to always remember.
The first impression of the person can be compared to advertising. It's also, roughly speaking, is human. So, any good marketer knows one rule: when you first come across an advertisement of a certain product, you will likely not remember it. No matter sports car whether it is a cure for migraines or a new book. This is only a novelty — it is not remembered.
But after about the third or fourth viewing, you will notice that involuntarily you remember the words and images of this advertising and begin to respond to her differently, really looking at its contents.So it is with man.
Or, to put it simply.
- Show yourself. A handshake, saying their name and demonstrating their clothes in the first minute of meeting a new person is not all. Try to run into him in other settings that he realized: "Oh, so that's it really!"
- Be persistent. If you will certainly need to show themselves in a favorable light, and the first time it failed, don't even hesitate: meet with the person in the second, third, fourth times; remember — the chance to change an opinion about the new friend you have always.
- Pay attention to the interlocutor. It is not enough just to show yourself, you need to show interest in the opponent. People always like when they do focus, even if you just say something about their favorite ice cream.
In General, it is better not to worry about the first impression, do not be afraid to appear not in the light and just be yourself. :)
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According to the materials of Jeff Goins, quora See also
Test: What first impression do you make?
Of excessive expectations