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Julie Deci: self-sufficient person is a myth
Doctor of philosophy, Julie Solutions, says that there is no person, which would be entirely self-sufficient, would not need the support, would not have been injured those closest to him or her and would not be in a dominant relationship. Why is self-sufficient, independent and netravmirovannymi personality is a stupid myth?
The boy's mother with serious genetic defects shared his story.After learning that her son can't speak and will never become independent, it began to lead an isolated lifestyle, avoiding other parents and not allowing the son to communicate with peers. She couldn't bear to listen to the stories of parents about the progress of their children and to see her child with "normal" children, one of which he will never be.
Seventy six million seven hundred thirty four thousand one hundred fifteen
Besides, it seemed to her that her son will not be able to socialize and always will be an outcast. To cope with the shock, in seclusion, she decided to try to lead a more social lifestyle.
Now she is pleased with the decision because her son had friends. No holding back tears she says that his best friend is a boy without genetic abnormalities – offers her son to pull his hair and pretends he likes it, because his best friend is fun. One day she saw her son's friend, thinking that is alone with him, took a napkin and wiped the saliva from his face, remembering that that's his mom.
I'm sure intuitive example of such a friendship is associated with the epithet "real". It is strange that when talking about the relationship between two people without any genetic abnormalities but this intuition does not work.
Positive psychology as the ideal relationship communication promotes self-sufficient individuals, not causing them discomfort. The only problem is that the Autonomous individual is a myth.
Even in the absence of genetic abnormalities, any man is a set of various other types of deviations. For example, if the apparent strangeness of the boy who chose me as the best friend of someone who should be wiped from the face of the saliva? Because the self-sufficient person is a fiction, there are no such relations, whose members would be entirely self-sufficient.
Twenty one million six hundred thirty five thousand three hundred two
Recently in the network is found, more tests, prompting you to check whether the respondents within the dominant relations. The most advanced of tests, following the current trends in attitudes towards emancipation, it is recommended to leave the relationship if the result is affirmative of the text.
The catch here is that many of the questions of these tests can also be considered a test, whether you are actually in a relationship. Moreover, not only a close relationship, but even any fruitful dialogue can be considered dominant, because each of its members justify their position, thus attempting to "impose" her interlocutor. If the person is open to dialogue, he might listen to the arguments of the other and to change its position, thus becoming the victim of "domination".
To describe the friendship of these boys also fit the term "dominant relationship". Each of friends can be considered as the one who dominates. Boy with genetic defects, being dependent and needs the support of each and can not respond in the same way – to be friends with such a child inevitably means to be used. While his best friend is forced to treat him as less independent than he is and, accordingly, as to patronized them.
With a prescription to avoid dominant relationship, is linked with another prescription of positive psychology is to avoid any traumatic situations, including relationships that involve trauma. There is a close relationship in which the participants do not injure each other?
In his essay "Emma" Liotard develops extraordinary philosophical image.
He interpreterpath childhood as the initial susceptibility and predisposition to enduring and trenirovannosti. Childhood, Liotru, does not end with the onset of adulthood, it continues in adulthood as a vulnerability.
Thus, childhood is a constitutive part of adulthood, manifesting itself in situations when an adult feels defenseless and open to trauma.
The inner child in the philosophy of Lyotard radically different from the concept of the inner child, offer positive psychology. The latter encourages the adult to heal his inner child, the inner child philosophy, Lyotard essentially incurable, furthermore, it symbolizes the opposite of any healing and therapy; it is itself the trauma, the presence of which is a condition of any intimate relationship.
According to Lyotard, love is possible only when adults resort to the original enduring, in other words, "love exists only in so far as adults are like children." Intimacy is manifested as vulnerability to others and, consequently, open to trauma.
Not only the experience of close relations with necessity being traumatic, this property has and the process of acquiring any other important life experience.
According to Freud, the trauma is inevitable. Drawing a parallel between the physical injury and the mental, he argued that «psychic trauma or the memory of it acts like a foreign body, which after penetrating inside for a long time is acting factor".
Thus,trauma is the result of the presence of a foreign body that cannot be accumulated by the body. In the case of psychological trauma analogue of the foreign body is a new experience, because it is by definition different from the old, that is already the cash of the individual experience, and therefore is to him alien and therefore can not safely merge with it together.
Surprisingly, about traumatic experiences usually remember with regret, how about something that could have been avoided. When it overlooked that if from early childhoodpeople wouldn't be regularly traumatized by the new environment, he would not even learned to walk.
What is psychological trauma
How the genetic code affects the character and destiny
Don't know who benefits and why it is so widespread myth about the possibility of a self-sufficient, independent and netravmirovannymi personality.I have never met a man who was completely self-sufficient, would not need the support, would not have been injured those closest to him or her and would not be in a dominant relationship.
No, not even hope, I'm for equality, but for human equality, understood as a mash-up of abnormalities, oddities, injury, lack of independence and inferiority, not equality self-sufficient netravmirovannymi each other's personalities. Just because the latter is stupid and therefore dangerous myth. published
Author: Julie Deci
Source: puree.su/2016/06/03/o-dominirovanii-travmatizatsii-i-blizosti
The boy's mother with serious genetic defects shared his story.After learning that her son can't speak and will never become independent, it began to lead an isolated lifestyle, avoiding other parents and not allowing the son to communicate with peers. She couldn't bear to listen to the stories of parents about the progress of their children and to see her child with "normal" children, one of which he will never be.
Seventy six million seven hundred thirty four thousand one hundred fifteen
Besides, it seemed to her that her son will not be able to socialize and always will be an outcast. To cope with the shock, in seclusion, she decided to try to lead a more social lifestyle.
Now she is pleased with the decision because her son had friends. No holding back tears she says that his best friend is a boy without genetic abnormalities – offers her son to pull his hair and pretends he likes it, because his best friend is fun. One day she saw her son's friend, thinking that is alone with him, took a napkin and wiped the saliva from his face, remembering that that's his mom.
I'm sure intuitive example of such a friendship is associated with the epithet "real". It is strange that when talking about the relationship between two people without any genetic abnormalities but this intuition does not work.
Positive psychology as the ideal relationship communication promotes self-sufficient individuals, not causing them discomfort. The only problem is that the Autonomous individual is a myth.
Even in the absence of genetic abnormalities, any man is a set of various other types of deviations. For example, if the apparent strangeness of the boy who chose me as the best friend of someone who should be wiped from the face of the saliva? Because the self-sufficient person is a fiction, there are no such relations, whose members would be entirely self-sufficient.
Twenty one million six hundred thirty five thousand three hundred two
Recently in the network is found, more tests, prompting you to check whether the respondents within the dominant relations. The most advanced of tests, following the current trends in attitudes towards emancipation, it is recommended to leave the relationship if the result is affirmative of the text.
The catch here is that many of the questions of these tests can also be considered a test, whether you are actually in a relationship. Moreover, not only a close relationship, but even any fruitful dialogue can be considered dominant, because each of its members justify their position, thus attempting to "impose" her interlocutor. If the person is open to dialogue, he might listen to the arguments of the other and to change its position, thus becoming the victim of "domination".
To describe the friendship of these boys also fit the term "dominant relationship". Each of friends can be considered as the one who dominates. Boy with genetic defects, being dependent and needs the support of each and can not respond in the same way – to be friends with such a child inevitably means to be used. While his best friend is forced to treat him as less independent than he is and, accordingly, as to patronized them.
With a prescription to avoid dominant relationship, is linked with another prescription of positive psychology is to avoid any traumatic situations, including relationships that involve trauma. There is a close relationship in which the participants do not injure each other?
In his essay "Emma" Liotard develops extraordinary philosophical image.
He interpreterpath childhood as the initial susceptibility and predisposition to enduring and trenirovannosti. Childhood, Liotru, does not end with the onset of adulthood, it continues in adulthood as a vulnerability.
Thus, childhood is a constitutive part of adulthood, manifesting itself in situations when an adult feels defenseless and open to trauma.
The inner child in the philosophy of Lyotard radically different from the concept of the inner child, offer positive psychology. The latter encourages the adult to heal his inner child, the inner child philosophy, Lyotard essentially incurable, furthermore, it symbolizes the opposite of any healing and therapy; it is itself the trauma, the presence of which is a condition of any intimate relationship.
According to Lyotard, love is possible only when adults resort to the original enduring, in other words, "love exists only in so far as adults are like children." Intimacy is manifested as vulnerability to others and, consequently, open to trauma.
Not only the experience of close relations with necessity being traumatic, this property has and the process of acquiring any other important life experience.
According to Freud, the trauma is inevitable. Drawing a parallel between the physical injury and the mental, he argued that «psychic trauma or the memory of it acts like a foreign body, which after penetrating inside for a long time is acting factor".
Thus,trauma is the result of the presence of a foreign body that cannot be accumulated by the body. In the case of psychological trauma analogue of the foreign body is a new experience, because it is by definition different from the old, that is already the cash of the individual experience, and therefore is to him alien and therefore can not safely merge with it together.
Surprisingly, about traumatic experiences usually remember with regret, how about something that could have been avoided. When it overlooked that if from early childhoodpeople wouldn't be regularly traumatized by the new environment, he would not even learned to walk.
What is psychological trauma
How the genetic code affects the character and destiny
Don't know who benefits and why it is so widespread myth about the possibility of a self-sufficient, independent and netravmirovannymi personality.I have never met a man who was completely self-sufficient, would not need the support, would not have been injured those closest to him or her and would not be in a dominant relationship.
No, not even hope, I'm for equality, but for human equality, understood as a mash-up of abnormalities, oddities, injury, lack of independence and inferiority, not equality self-sufficient netravmirovannymi each other's personalities. Just because the latter is stupid and therefore dangerous myth. published
Author: Julie Deci
Source: puree.su/2016/06/03/o-dominirovanii-travmatizatsii-i-blizosti