That controls your interlocutor: the Main Diagnostic Rule Bashny.Net

Each person should have the tools to understand what's happening right now and determine what controls its source.

One of the main such tools is the Main Diagnostic Rule:

People live in projections, shifting past experiences on the present.

How we treat our mother (or the eldest woman who replaced her in childhood: her grandmother, stepmother, aunt, older sister), so we treat all women.

How we relate to his father (the older man who replaced him in childhood: grandfather, stepfather, uncle, older brother), so we will treat all men.



Shot from a film "Girls"

How to use this Rule?

It will be easier to accept a person if You realize thatit reacts not on You personally, and unconsciously projecting his attitude to the parent of Your gender in communicating with You.

For example, You are a woman, and a colleague at work when it starts to get a bit push tone. And if You thought before that she doesn't like You, then using this Rule, You begin to realize that in her child the experience of a trauma hurt her, the older woman, and she is projecting on You his attitude towards it (as if he sees it in You).

When You begin to realize that it was her unexamined experience, it will be easier to accept it and to enter into a relationship with her cooperation.

You will remain calm and say to yourself: "this person has a trauma from his father (mother), and I just help him realize that injury".



Frame from the movie Intimacy

So You go from protest to his state of ravnoznachnosti and adoption.

You will not waste energy nor to condemn yourself because You like that person, You are so, no condemnation of the interlocutor.

And saving energy will allow You to see new opportunities around you. published

©Mark Ifraimov

 

Also interesting: don't tell the young that there is a generic program...

Children's resentment shape Destiny
 

 

P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

Source: www.facebook.com/MarkIfraimov.ru/