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How to install a child emotional contact
"For many years I taught a subject sexuality to medical students at the medical center of the Louisiana State University in new Orleans. In the amphitheater, surrounded by a few hundred almost-doctors, I asked to get two volunteers for a demonstration of touch". I asked for one to take the other hand and begin to stroke her, standing in front of classmates. I purposely chose the two men because he knew that the usual homophobia will cause them to try to perform my job with no real feeling to each other. "Contractor" has consistently started quickly stroking the hand of a friend – and the same mechanical movements. I have often started to "help" him by giving him advice: "Try to make the movements more slowly". The usual answer was: "I try!" The contractor continued zealously to scratch your partner's hand. Sometimes there were such, who still was moving slowly enough to feel your partner. And you can guess what happened at this point: they immediately stopped touching! During feedback we discussed how it relates to what they do with their lovers and patients. And they began to justify the lack of contact.
I'll never forget one of the occasions when I've performed this demonstration: one of my selected students were more Mature man who entered the medical faculty is not right out of College. I was amazed watching how slowly and deliberately he touched his "partner". The second contestant was dying from embarrassment and homophobia. I told him that I have never in ten years of demonstrations not seen someone so successfully touched the partner. "For this I need to collect in a fist all my will," replied the student, continuing to touch the hand of his partner during our conversation. A few days later, this student caught up with me in the hallway when I was leaving his office. "Remember me? I was one of the demonstrators". "Do I remember? You I will never forget!" "I wanted to tell you what happened to me since. I started thinking about my five year son. He constantly complains that I'm too rough with him – that I am hurting him, when we organize some games.
After the demonstration, I realized that touching him so rough cause I really feel it. And I was afraid that he may become a nurse. And realized that this fear is worry son. My son has always been like clockwork, it was difficult to get them to do something – he was even diagnosed with "hyperactivity". And so, after thinking about what happened in the classroom, I tried to touch him. I just allowed myself to feel it. It was a few days ago. My wife can't believe the changes that had happened since then. My son suddenly became quiet... as if someone had discharged its internal charge. I just wanted to say thank you!" Within seconds we were both silent. We just stared at each other. Finally, I said, "do You mind if I ever write about you and your son?" "What? We have something special?" "Yes, there is a particular beauty! I think your experience will help many people."
Excerpt from the book David Snarge "a Passionate marriage"
Source: /users/42
I'll never forget one of the occasions when I've performed this demonstration: one of my selected students were more Mature man who entered the medical faculty is not right out of College. I was amazed watching how slowly and deliberately he touched his "partner". The second contestant was dying from embarrassment and homophobia. I told him that I have never in ten years of demonstrations not seen someone so successfully touched the partner. "For this I need to collect in a fist all my will," replied the student, continuing to touch the hand of his partner during our conversation. A few days later, this student caught up with me in the hallway when I was leaving his office. "Remember me? I was one of the demonstrators". "Do I remember? You I will never forget!" "I wanted to tell you what happened to me since. I started thinking about my five year son. He constantly complains that I'm too rough with him – that I am hurting him, when we organize some games.
After the demonstration, I realized that touching him so rough cause I really feel it. And I was afraid that he may become a nurse. And realized that this fear is worry son. My son has always been like clockwork, it was difficult to get them to do something – he was even diagnosed with "hyperactivity". And so, after thinking about what happened in the classroom, I tried to touch him. I just allowed myself to feel it. It was a few days ago. My wife can't believe the changes that had happened since then. My son suddenly became quiet... as if someone had discharged its internal charge. I just wanted to say thank you!" Within seconds we were both silent. We just stared at each other. Finally, I said, "do You mind if I ever write about you and your son?" "What? We have something special?" "Yes, there is a particular beauty! I think your experience will help many people."
Excerpt from the book David Snarge "a Passionate marriage"
Source: /users/42
