Memo for those who have a relationship so strained that they are ready to break

It is so arranged that a person does not see himself, his contribution to the events of his life. A lot of things are accidental. The mirror gives him a partner: a man is a woman, a woman is a man. If you contemplate a partner, then through him, through reflections in him, through feedback from him, you can learn a lot about yourself, if not everything.

Very often we are not ready to look at ourselves through a loved one. Especially who we're having sex with. But life, whether we like it or not, carries with it Rules, non-obvious Truths, a kind of Knowledge, which, whether we believe in this Knowledge or not, form first relations between people, and then, as a consequence, events.

I suggest you know and remember the rules by which the relationship between a man and a woman develops.

Well, first of all, in order to understand what awaits us tomorrow. Secondly, to stop resenting the actions of the partner, realizing that everything in life is always fair and regular.

And thirdly, I am tired of repeating this one rule, this one rule, this one rule, this third rule to each and every one who encounters them in their negative situations. So I decided to create a Memo to which I would refer all the suffering.

The current Memo is for those who have a relationship with the opposite sex so strained that they are about to break. I hope that awareness will come to you and you will stop blaming your partner by looking at yourself and your subpersonalities.

Men and women experiencing tension in relationships:

1. Man and woman are meant to serve each other. Their relationship is interdependent, whether they want it or not.

To the maximum, each person wants to reach his potential during his life, but he is hampered by the mask-roles-subpersonalities that he had to put on himself to survive in conditions where his parents criticized him and punished him. Service is expressed in the fact that a man and a woman build all relationships with each other on the principle of complementarity.

What one partner lacks to realize and release from the subpersonality that prevents him from revealing his potential, the other side will complement him with his subpersonalities. When one side needs to realize and free itself from the Sacrifice, then the other side has to be a Tyrant. Another example is when a woman needs to express herself as a strong person, a man needs to become weak in order to complete her.

2. Male service to a woman consists in making known what is hidden in a woman, that is, what she does not yet know about herself.

A man by his behavior reveals those subpersonalities that a woman in herself suppresses:

(a) A man drinks when a woman does not admit she is pressuring. It is as if he were telling her: I have to be insane so you can be a guardian.

(b) Man hits as woman gets stuck in Victim: I have to be dangerous so you have someone to be afraid of.

c) A man loafes when a woman takes on the burden of responsibility and becomes a mommy to him: I have to be inept to have someone to teach.

(d) A man cheats when he cannot make his “first woman” — his mother — happy: I must be a traitor so that you cease to be a victim (by addressing your mother but living with your wife).

3. Women’s ministry is to be a man’s mirror reflecting what he has already achieved. It doesn’t matter if he reaches the top or the abyss.

When a man is determined and confident, there is a woman next to him who complements him with his softness and trust.

When a man is helpless, the Almighty is with him.

When he's in need, he's important.

When he is the Sufferer, she is the Comforter.

When he's a liar, she's the incriminating one.

4. A man is always focused on the satisfaction of a woman. He has two of them: his wife and his mother. The tug of men’s attention on one of these women will always provoke the protest of the other.

5. A woman always expects from a man what her father could not give her. Based on the need for security, she always projects negative past experiences with previous men into her current relationship. Dad is the first man in her life. Subpersonalities that were formed in the girl during her life in a parental family with or without her mother, father or father create patterns of her behavior with a man, initiating him to create his qualities of subpersonalities.

6. A woman’s husband and father have different roles. The father should protect and provide for the daughter, and the husband wants to protect and provide for his wife when she inspires him.

7. The happiness of a woman is not in a man, but with him. The happiness of any man cannot be outside him. It, like any other feeling, is only within you. To expect happiness from another is to make him responsible (read guilty) for having (read lack) his happiness.

8. Ordinary, everyday, everyday family happiness comes when at least one side in the next conflict realizes which subpersonalities are now playing their roles and refuses to support their role emotionally. The roles are co-dependent, so the subpersonality of the other side will automatically blow away like a balloon.

9. All of the subpersonalities that destroy relationships, though manifested through conflicts, are parental messages waiting for you to send them to the real hosts. They are waiting for you to fully realize who and under what circumstances has not satisfied their needs, expressed feelings, completed the gestalt. It is easier and faster to identify subpersonalities and send them to the hosts using placements.

10. Your partner’s behavior should be a feedback loop through which you can see your subpersonalities preventing you from achieving your goals. Looking at the behavior of a man, as in a mirror, a woman must realize for her happiness that it prevents her from being surrounded by care and love. Looking at the behavior of a woman, a man will always soberly appreciate how he is in harmony with the world. published

Author: Mark Ifraimov



P.S. And remember, just by changing your consciousness – together we change the world!

Source: www.markifraimov.ru/? p=1891