You didn't say no or Why women do not resist during the violence

People wonder why the woman doesn't "resist" during the rape. However, they are not surprised when the woman refuses to argue. They are not surprised when she interrupted. They are not surprised when she specifically tells more quiet and unemotional voice. They don't be surprised when women give clear signals that they are not interested in the conversation, or what is unpleasant to them is a stranger to physical intimacy, but their wishes are ignored. No surprise everyday social situations in which women behave quietly, which they ignored, perceived as invisible, because these social situations are the norm. They look like normal women, they look like normal men, because we all grew up in the same cultural sandbox, drinking the same medicine.

And suddenly, for no reason at all, when women are raped, all these natural and invisible social behavior are used as evidence that in fact the woman was not raped. Because she's not fighting, not screaming loudly, not running, not kicking, not punching. She let him in your room, although it was clear what he wants. She was flirting with him, she kissed him. After some time she stopped saying "no."

These rules of social behaviour that instill in women isn't just oil the wheels of Patriarchy. Women are told that obedience to these rules is their protection, and for violation of these rules they will be punished.

It's a hell of a rude awakening from illusions, when a woman is raped, and she follows the rules she had been taught to follow all her life – she refuses to talk, refuses to flirt, don't go away by ignoring it, beats, no screaming, no fights, no raises voice, does not deny that she liked to kiss – and it turns out that now she'll be charged with rape. She followed the rules. The very rules that were supposed to protect her from rape. Thus, the rules, the violation of which makes it "legitimate target" for verbal and physical abuse.

It was assumed that the punishment for violation of these rules and not enforcing them.Because every time she spoke in a quiet voice, refused to its own borders, are not excluded, is allowed to ignore their own needs, she received positive reinforcement companies. And now she say she did it all wrong that this was an exceptional case, when all we had to do the opposite, and she had to know about it, yeah.

If you have ever watched hendersoniana the social behaviour of women was seen as the woman hunted takes unpleasant to her attention; as the speaking woman, kill; as the woman persisted in denying that she was upset with public humiliation; as a woman touching due to the fact that she wears; as a woman refuses to argue and said nothing and did not, then you have no right to ask the question: "Why didn't she resist?"

She didn't fight back because you told her not to. Never. Under any circumstances. You told her that it is normal, necessary and right.



P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©


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