Weak is not the one who cannot and who does not want to! Bashny.Net

In this article I will talk about how after 10 years working as a psychologist I have to admit the uselessness of many of their actions.

Can't remember why it happened, but since childhood I believed that all people are good and capable. Believed that evil can change and become good. Believed that telling lies can become honest. That naive can become adults. That the weak become strong. Greedy — generous. The poor — rich. Stupid — smart.

It's partly why I chose the profession of psychologist. I've seen people suffer from difficulties and troubles. Stupidity and cowardice. From ignorance, insecurity, weakness, cowardice, envy, deception and everything that makes us unhappy. However, and what makes us happy — we too suffer. Especially when the weak is given power. When the poor are given money. When the evil kind. When love begins villain...

I wanted to help those people whose suffering I saw. I would click in their head that they don't do that causes them pain. And I did it! True. I can do that now. But there is one "but" that haunts me. These people soon again stepped on the same rake. They returned again to the same, which suffered so much from.






For example, from meaninglessness:

Just want to me someone pointed out what I can live with. I have been in this state before... and every time I found some reasons... but time passes, and I'm always convinced that they are meaningless. When trying to someone to open, you best just listen. waiting for the moment to insert another trite cliche. Just want to grit our teeth and beat with all his strength his fist into the wall. what I have been doing. And it scares me my present state of... Emptiness... Hard... and disgusting to look at myself from the outside (from a letter to the client).

Loneliness:

I'm lonely. I'm a total jerk. A weak, spineless man who does not know at all what he need. Studying in medical. I hope to become a doctor. But who will I be if I'm so deranged slowpoke? The doctor should be cynical and self-reliant. Believe in yourself. And I don't trust myself. I won't be able to achieve in life.

Weak is not the one who can not, and he who does not want

I once fell out with 4 of the fourth floor. And why am I not dead then? Even the ribs have not broken a single one. Rupture of the kidney and spleen. Does anyone need me to live? Why? The hell needs it? Learn learn get your one hundred dollars to forty years, then two hundred dollars. Live like a bum, everyone hates you, despise you for your lack of intelligence. And you live. Something the Dreamer to remind you of the "White nights" by Dostoevsky. I'm not as smart as he is. I end up just the same. Unless, of course, will die sooner. 30, 40, 50 years. And I'm sitting alone in his kennel or on a garbage can and read Marquez. A good picture (from the history of the client).

Love:

In 2013, the year I met a guy. In November of 2014 I started Dating him, and a week later he cheated on me with my friend, and I learned about it and left him. I sent him a message. Three days he called me and asked for forgiveness, saying he loves me, but I have not forgiven him.

On the 4th day he said that if I will not return to it, he will commit suicide. I didn't believe. A week later, he did it. But before his death sent all of the messages in which he asked forgiveness of everyone and tells me he loves me. At the funeral, I was not: I was in shock from what happened. A month later, his parents blamed me (the customer).

In the latter case was weak, of course, the man, not the girl. And it is very significant. For all his work, I became convinced that often it is men who are the most vulnerable and hardest to survive the wounds inflicted by the wrong relationships. But advice go, it is women. Men don't have the courage to admit their vulnerability.

Here care for you, care, support and honestly believe in you. And you pretend so skillfully and it seems that you start to believe in yourself. But. Then again there is that damn "but". You again something is missing, something happened, someone hurt. And you're beefing about. Everything returns to the source. Why? is a question that I do not require a response. I know the answer.

There are people strong, and there weak.

These weak will always suffer, they will always be something to miss, under various pretexts, others will use them at their discretion, they will never be in abundance, health, happiness, love and money.

And what is the main difference the strong from the weak? As I wrote at the top, weak is not one who cannot and who does not want to. That's all. And to argue this makes no sense. How to understand what a man wants? Look at what he's doing. If it doesn't — then does. But people often pretend on the grounds that they can't do something. Ask him what did you do? — it turns out that he did not even bother her, jope to tear off the couch. That's the power of his "want". So I just say goodbye.

My friend, Lyubomir, once asked me, who are my customers? I replied that it was primarily poor suffering girls and women. He said that it is wrong. My clients need to be successful people who at one stage needed temporary help from a psychologist. And helping, feeling sorry and showing empathy for poor people, nothing good will. Neither financially, nor socially.

I've been thinking about this question. And the last point set, working on the recent elections with politicians. Two months of almost daily meetings with people of different strata, from a powerful existing members and to the villagers who sought to become members of your village, I realized that Victor was right. Most of the negative stress I experienced working with the "weak" who have pretended to want to be "strong". These people were a few hundred. And I honestly tried to help them as well as strong. But all in vain. I was upset, I was angry at myself, at them. Looking for the key and the approach to them. But I had to admit that if a person wants to grow, to learn — I'm just powerless.

Know how weak? They need to command. Stupid command. Just saying do so and so. Without dialogue, without any reflection. Not asking what they think, what they feel. This can cause suspicion. Just team. And they like it. They understand the language. It is native for them.

When I was at University at the faculty of psychology, really could not understand why clients go to psychotherapy over the years. Well, do not be quick so the "SNiP-SNiP" and to solve the problem? Then I learned that to solve the problem fast. Need. But man does not change. He lives again so, so true to yourself and to others that he was forced to carry a mess of your head to a psychologist or psychotherapist. The conclusion, with which I struggled for 10 years sounds like a sentence — People don't change.

Exactly 10 years it took me to discover this obvious truth.

10 years I fought to prove that people can change.

10 years I lost in this fight.

Strong will be strong.

And weak — weak.

Now I weed out the weak customers.

Now raise the cost of their services in order to increase the distance between us.

Recently, one girl we met, I slightly lifted the curtain of his life and one of the messages asked to pity her. It wasn't appeal to me as a man. That was as a friend-a psychologist. I had to refrain because sparing the people, we only increase their disbelief in themselves.

10 years of helping weak people over.

It's time to become more efficient. published

Author: Andrew Ralvero

 

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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Source: kstati.net/nikogda-ne-pomogaj-slabym/