From weight loss to eating disorders the short path

A few years ago when I studied nutrition in College, I promised myself that I will make every effort to eat right and exercise. You say that for a student of my profile this is not unusual, and probably be right. When the whole life revolves around nutrition and food, it sounds quite logical.

So well all started. I started going to the gym, to control the power with the application for iPhone and calorie counting. Very soon I noticed that the numbers on the scales crept down. I was proud of who I am disciplined and purposeful. With each week I became more and more restricted your diet, by cutting calories and increasing training.

Week after week, month after month... This diet became normal for me. However, I experienced a tremendous sense of guilt: it engulfed me whenever I exceed the calorie intake, or missed workout.

I engaged in self-flagellation, literally choking on the poison of criticism and self-hatred. At that time I already lost more than four kilograms, but did not become happier. On the contrary, I became more wretched than ever. My decision for food was based on numbers: the numbers on the scale, numbers with counting calories that I will ingest or are burned during a workout. My life consisted of continuous numbers.

Each morning I was weighed, and from the numbers on the scales depended on what my mood that day. Simply put, I had a fixation on food and weight. Little could please me more joy than reducing weight.

I remember I once posted on a social network a picture of weights where it was seen as decreased weight. My friends put "likes" and comments about "will power" not knowing that in this way they provoke even stronger disorder my eating behavior. This continued for a year until I finally woke up.

I have always been interested in the topic of eating disorders, but, of course, I was absolutely sure I this won't be a problem. During the study information on the topic I came across a link to a small test to determine the risk of developing eating disorders.

I didn't give it much importance, because he believed his behavior is totally normal, but still decided to take the test. Of course, it turned out that in my case the chances of developing the disorder was enormous, and the result surprised me and forced me to look at the situation anew.

I finally realized how destructive my behavior was. I realized that I need to change something. And this time I was going to change not the body. Breaking the way of life which had become familiar, was incredibly difficult. I deleted the app for calorie counting, I began to force myself to skip workouts and eat what I wanted, despite the energy value of food. It was a daily struggle. I tried to resist the need to weigh in, and it literally was draining me. I struggled trying to change your way of thinking. Old habits trying to find a loophole in my life, so I still have to deal with them.

I know that this fight will never end, but today I can confidently say that I feel comfortable in this body. I have no more weights, but I still find it hard to resist the urge to weigh myself when I ever see them. I gained almost seven pounds. There are days when I hate myself for asking, these days most, but I understand that these seven pounds, probably saved me, saved my life, and I am eternally grateful for that.

If not for the struggle with food and ideas about my own body, I would not be the specialist nutritionistI am now. Thanks to my experience, when working with each client, I primarily try to do everything in my power to bring him to a healthy lifestyle without the feeling of guilt, deprivation and restriction.

If I could go back in time, I would not change anything; that time was one of the hardest in my life, but I've had a lot of love and self-respect. I began to notice my personality. I changed your views on weight loss, because I realized that weight is not health and that there are more important things that need attention.

And most importantly I learned that I am much more than just a body, and now my goal is to help others realize this.published


Author: Josie Sawinski

P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©

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