Modern parents complain about their "abnormal" children they can not understand. What is the reason for the gap between the generations?
My solid teaching experience shows that "abnormal" children, because of which the parents heart aches and my heart cries, in the vast majority deserve parental love and pride. Just elders do not want to take into account the fact that they themselves entered into adulthood with a system of social relations, and children - while radically different, so clear the difference should not be taken for abnormality
The initiators in the solution of problems in the relationship, the children's parents - parents should be
I read in the literature that there are bad from birth about 5% of people, the remaining 95% - good. But in real life we are witnessing another proportion. Among the good people from birth, in my experience, have strong self-sufficient individuals who uphold the principles of integrity; and there are weaknesses, which are adapted to the others, and so are rough and gentle, aggressive and compliant.
I recall from the practice conversation with 19-year-old student, Irina, "cool" a beauty that is aware of its advantage in the beauty and development, and therefore behaving provocatively arrogant. The conversation has not turned out. And I told her, "I give up, goodbye, to you do not mind»
A girl does not want to say goodbye, and soon confesses: "If I change my behavior, I will give myself and lowered in the eyes of her friends." I draw her attention to the fact that in the workplace it is necessary to meet the already established hierarchy, and in the future family will need to find a common language with children, her husband and his relatives. Even now it's time to learn something to give, not to create problems for yourself because nonplasticity in nature.
Similarly, arrogance and distinguished student of Roman (21). For him there were no authorities or among classmates, or among teachers. The reason - the childhood spent in the criminal environment, dominated by the cult of brute force, aggression, arrogance, humiliation of others
Quite a brief discussion found certain intellectual level of a young man and his willingness to make personal contact with me. So I offered him the motivation to correct the behavior:
For 20 years you have acted with brute force, and now for 3 years in college try to behave as required by educators: diligently study, discipline and do not break the rules of the hostel, develop their interests in his spare time. The result would certainly be good. But not the main thing. In college degree you can make an informed choice between two models of organizing your life. This will be your own decision that will affect your destiny.
Time has shown that Irina and Roman were able to adjust their behavior and achieve some success.
Our short meeting gave only a push for action and willingness to change matured in them for a long time, but to give her a way out, they did not dare.
As it is important that in such a critical period in the life of our children had a joint analysis with a more experienced person to hear practical life tips.
Author: Lyudmila Andrievska