Before I had my own children, I imagined that I would be the perfect mother and inherit the best qualities of film heroine-mothers of all time. I certainly understand that it is unlikely I will be able to cook dinner every night from the ground up, as do the majority of them.
But when we are together with my husband took the program "Child number one" in 2009, I suddenly start to set more realistic goals. Because I do understand that there is no good purpose if it is inaccessible. Without a doubt, I would like, as far as possible, to become the best mom, but I did not want to entirely dissolve in children and, as a consequence, to move away from her husband, or to forget about yourself. When I was a fierce struggle, I wanted to achieve a balance between my expectations and the objective reality. But, as a result, I am face to face with the requirements of that society and the other moms are bringing to me.
To challenge the unhealthy idea of motherhood and the role of women in society - the main purpose of the article Amber Doty "Put her husband in the first place." In this article, Doty has openly stated that her husband has been ranked among the priorities in her life:
«While I understand the difference between the volatility in marriage and the inextricable link between mother and child, I nevertheless decided to consider that my family and I generally can get with some prioritization. I realized that if I put my husband in the first place, this will reduce the likelihood of divorce and increase the likelihood that our children will be happy to live in a complete family ». I>
When I read this passage, I agreed and nodded silently. Education - not an easy process, and to be honest, I do not want to do this alone. No doubt, a romantic dinner with my husband, or chat with friends will help you make detente and with new forces to start raising a child.
If the baby is the only reason that you live, your children will undoubtedly grow selfish. But if you give the privilege of a spouse, so you teach children to respect themselves, father, mother and outsiders. Seeing how his parents love each other, the child will also learn to show love, patience, and compassion for others. I did not see anything in this selfish. It's quite an effective method of education.
I'm not saying that you and your husband, for example, flew the next flight to Paris on vacation at the time your child enters the scene and get a certificate. But why not send the children to the grandmother at night? It is in any case does not make you a bad parent!
Appreciate your spouse love your children and find time for yourself! All this can harmoniously co-exist within a healthy marriage and a happy family. During the construction of crucial a solid foundation, and that is why I continue to put our relationship with her husband beyond my relationship with my children. As parents, we want to raise healthy and happy children, give them a better future. It all depends on us: if mom and dad love each other, then their child will live in peace and love.
It is important to put the right priorities in life, it will make you happy and your family. We share this important information with others.