About strong, very strong ... Natasha Bashny.Net

Dinara Kasimov - young photographer, lives in St. Petersburg. She attended the course photojournalist Sergei Maximishin. PP-Online publishes her photo story "about Natasha", received this year's Grand Prix "Photoseries the Year" at the contest "Best Photographer 2010", and the interview that took Dinara from her character.

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January 10, 1980 was born in Upper Ufaley Chelyabinsk region in a large family.
1985 Railway injury.
1986-95 was in the orphanage Kusa, Chelyabinsk region.
1996-2002 studied at the Polytechnic of Pavlovsk Leningrad Region as an artist-designer.
2002 married.
2003 birth of the first daughter Lidochka. As a result of medical negligence diagnosis - cerebral palsy mixed form hyperkinetic syndrome, spastic tetroporez.
In 2005 after a long ordeal family of three people with disabilities receives housing.
2007 was born the youngest Katya.
2010 after the story on NTV that the family has no car by the authorities, Natalia presented cars.
March 2010 diagnosed with cancer of IV degree, the fight against the disease continues.





If you were a director, about what you'd made a film?

I'd made a film from real life, about someone such as I, that the people are healthy, could on the other hand look at life, appreciate it more worthy to understand that today you are, and tomorrow you do not. More to love each other, to appreciate.

The main character would be a young girl who'd survived the tragedy, for example, being lonely, lost child. It would be a turning point in life, change it. She would have started helping others. And over time, it would attract people such as she. She would have had a family, his job ... View Used nail salon (laughs) or selling their paintings, doing what she loves to do, helping others. It would be kind, sympathetic, penetration ... but much too good to be impossible.



What kind of people more good or bad?

Perhaps still longer prudent people who know that you can help, and tell you that you are cool, unique, though I somehow know that this man says so because he knows that to me, you can ask for help. But I do not push away the man may be, no one but me and comfort. Let it will be good. Many say that charged me. I think I was born for this and that charges me by the good ... or sucked energy (laughs).

Yes, I do not feel sorry. There are sometimes hurtful situations, but I hold a grudge in yourself, inside, I do not utter - suddenly the man will be even harder than me. We're all different. Here I was told that I am sick and can die soon - I can live with that, and the other say - he would go and throw himself out the window. So you can not say everything to everyone (laughs).



How did you know that you're getting better?

When I lived in an orphanage, I was a horrible person, or rather, like a sound, it was my self-defense or something. I smoked, mothers, closed in the room and draw. Comes to me head, "Natasha went to study," and I told her: "I went nah * D". What is wanted, then did.

He came to us from his new teacher. We have a girl died, she sat and signed a commemorative ribbon. I flew, no hello, no nothing. There are some guys hanging out, I told them: "greenhorns, there smoke?" I was given, I went for a smoke.

I'm usually in my eyes nobody was looking, and while smoking shot, so briefly looked into the eyes of the teacher, and I was so pleased with her eyes, I think we must go. I go, "Cho doing? Give me a cho-thread to draw. " She gave me. I took it and sit on it I glance. I think: "Good aunt, still no word did not tell me." All are gone somewhere: that there was a dinner, and we were alone. And she said to me: "It'll soon be the weekend, you do not want to visit me?".

And pi ** pepper! I was completely killed: I was such a bitch, that the whole orphanage afraid - she invites you to visit.

"You at least know who I am?" - "Who? I see - a girl ".

I then began to realize that I'm not really a shit what I try to do from themselves.

She began to take me to visit, we talked, and I was the one who I am.

I realized that it is better than when you are afraid, but when you are respected. I suddenly began to think that it is necessary to respect those adults who worked with us, fed us, teach, because they go away from their families to be with us, assholes.



What you love?

This is what we lack. This is when you feel different when you all want to do. And when you realize that it is not, then fades away.

Human love - is, of course, is not eternal. Love for children - is quite another. Love for Me - is also good when you do not let yourself and your family to humiliate. Since I love myself, I have to leave a good footprint, take care of the future of their children after his departure. To children's children said that there was a strong and tried to be as strong, persistent.



Do you have dreams?

Rarely. I am broken somewhere, flying, somebody shot me, and I wake up just before the shot, the war of some sort. I sleep all the time and I feel that if you do not wake up, then kill me. Sometimes with tears. All such time dreams, 10 years, 20 that 30.



What is your suffering?

If I do something bad, this one does not have to know. Even today learned about Lidochka only those with whom long time no see.

It pains me, in principle, was used. It's hard to be away from children, especially in the hospital: anxiety, although you know that children are people who you trust. Imagine - a whole day these walls, drip. Do not do anything, nor clean, nor for whom no care for, no cooking. It feels like you left a little bit, and it is a pity to lose the gift of time in the hospital. That's because time is flying by. I always feel sorry for the time madly, especially lately.



What is your time?

Time for me is life and life - a movement (smiling): woke up this book to read, the laundry, the cooked - it should be the other.

Time generally does not interest me: who the president, the life of stars - I do not care deeply.

Now we began to show how often die from cancer artists. Why is this all show? I look: here's a cancer patient and I understand that people who have money and communication, and all that you want, you still can not recover, burn. Najera is me and like me to show?



Why do people live?

Everyone defines for which he lives. If, before his brain somehow come that he should live a life that did not was sorry that he had lived, it seems to me that something should happen to a person.

It is a person that is not going to happen, he does not understand what is good and what is bad. Only when he learns, for example, about the terrible disease, or his close relatives, there is something terrible, it can overestimate life. Often, as is the case: born learned, the bars, the women, the parents bought an apartment, a car. So they live and die there in some stupid accident or drunk stabbed each other. So what? Why did this person live?

It would be better that life has got some kind of a sick child. This "member" on the legs go, and the child is in the hospital, suffering. If this child to give a little power this monster, burns his life, he would be cured and would understand that it is necessary to appreciate life. Many injustices ...



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