Recruitment office Bashny.Net

Conscription medical commission. Ophthalmologists shows recruits letters. He calls:
 - A!
 - No.
 - B!
 - No.
 - In!
 - No.
 - And what then? - Asks the recruit.
 - What is necessary, - - says vrach.- How did you find the room?
 - By smell - he says prizyvnik.- explained to me: optometrist immediately after using the toilet.
 - All right, go into a dark room - the doctor said.
 Turns inductee into the darkness, looking into the eyes through the device.
 - The eyes never hurt?
 - Just right - says prizyvnik.- My father left-handed.
 - A stool is normal? - Asks the optometrist.
 - Normal.
 - You've got bad eyesight, how do you know that the stool is normal? - Grins vrach.- Pass!
 - It would have just said! And then ... what letter, which letter ...
 Then a neurologist's office. Doctor hammer conscript a cup - again! Leg conscript twitches and a doctor in the chin - again! Neurologist scratching his chin:
 - Nerves are good! But I have no good. Pass!
 Conscript comes to the therapist.
 - Undress to the waist!
 Conscript undresses. The therapist says:
 - I said to strip to the waist and not to cowards!
 Conscript removes shorts and belt wears. The doctor and the nurse look at each other, but did not serve.
 - Breathe! Do not breathe! Do not breathe! .. Complaints have?
 - Yes, - said Dr. prizyvnik.-, as there is nothing to breathe!
 Further office lore. The doctor looks throat.
 - A-ah, - says a conscript.
 Looks nose
 - Mm-m, - moos inductee.
 - And in the ear plug! - Says the doctor.
 - Of champagne? It accompanied me to the army!
 - Get away over there, check out the whispered speech. Four ...
 - One hundred and fifty-four!
 - Twelve ...
 - One hundred and sixty-two!
 - Why did you all the time 150 is added?
 - To me, the army did not take, - says a conscript.
 Further dentist.
 - All teeth?
 - No, not all, I still have a house.
 - Be sure to take them with him to the army, - he says vrach.- Pass!
 Then the surgeon's office.
 - Bruises, fractures, dislocations?
 - Doctor, everything is there! - Says a conscript.
 - Very well, says hirurg.- So you do not get used. Complaints have?
 - There is! I have flat feet!
 The surgeon looks, takes off his sneakers, shows 2 iron:
 - That's what needs to be flat! Pass!
 Last psychiatrist. He rubs his hands together, winks, grunts, pulls his cheek, shoulder and leg simultaneously.
 - Nn-uh, uh-young che-che-man ka-ka-like niches you in-the-doctors?
 Conscript shrugs:
 - Some crazy
 Psychiatrist leans over and whispers in his ear:
 - Uh-oh, this is it-to-mow for geeks, ch-ch-in-to-in the army is not s-zagremet.- He laughs and leaping dramatically smolkaet.- Pass!