559
Recruitment office
Conscription medical commission. Ophthalmologists shows recruits letters. He calls:
- A!
- No.
- B!
- No.
- In!
- No.
- And what then? - Asks the recruit.
- What is necessary, - - says vrach.- How did you find the room?
- By smell - he says prizyvnik.- explained to me: optometrist immediately after using the toilet.
- All right, go into a dark room - the doctor said.
Turns inductee into the darkness, looking into the eyes through the device.
- The eyes never hurt?
- Just right - says prizyvnik.- My father left-handed.
- A stool is normal? - Asks the optometrist.
- Normal.
- You've got bad eyesight, how do you know that the stool is normal? - Grins vrach.- Pass!
- It would have just said! And then ... what letter, which letter ...
Then a neurologist's office. Doctor hammer conscript a cup - again! Leg conscript twitches and a doctor in the chin - again! Neurologist scratching his chin:
- Nerves are good! But I have no good. Pass!
Conscript comes to the therapist.
- Undress to the waist!
Conscript undresses. The therapist says:
- I said to strip to the waist and not to cowards!
Conscript removes shorts and belt wears. The doctor and the nurse look at each other, but did not serve.
- Breathe! Do not breathe! Do not breathe! .. Complaints have?
- Yes, - said Dr. prizyvnik.-, as there is nothing to breathe!
Further office lore. The doctor looks throat.
- A-ah, - says a conscript.
Looks nose
- Mm-m, - moos inductee.
- And in the ear plug! - Says the doctor.
- Of champagne? It accompanied me to the army!
- Get away over there, check out the whispered speech. Four ...
- One hundred and fifty-four!
- Twelve ...
- One hundred and sixty-two!
- Why did you all the time 150 is added?
- To me, the army did not take, - says a conscript.
Further dentist.
- All teeth?
- No, not all, I still have a house.
- Be sure to take them with him to the army, - he says vrach.- Pass!
Then the surgeon's office.
- Bruises, fractures, dislocations?
- Doctor, everything is there! - Says a conscript.
- Very well, says hirurg.- So you do not get used. Complaints have?
- There is! I have flat feet!
The surgeon looks, takes off his sneakers, shows 2 iron:
- That's what needs to be flat! Pass!
Last psychiatrist. He rubs his hands together, winks, grunts, pulls his cheek, shoulder and leg simultaneously.
- Nn-uh, uh-young che-che-man ka-ka-like niches you in-the-doctors?
Conscript shrugs:
- Some crazy
Psychiatrist leans over and whispers in his ear:
- Uh-oh, this is it-to-mow for geeks, ch-ch-in-to-in the army is not s-zagremet.- He laughs and leaping dramatically smolkaet.- Pass!
- A!
- No.
- B!
- No.
- In!
- No.
- And what then? - Asks the recruit.
- What is necessary, - - says vrach.- How did you find the room?
- By smell - he says prizyvnik.- explained to me: optometrist immediately after using the toilet.
- All right, go into a dark room - the doctor said.
Turns inductee into the darkness, looking into the eyes through the device.
- The eyes never hurt?
- Just right - says prizyvnik.- My father left-handed.
- A stool is normal? - Asks the optometrist.
- Normal.
- You've got bad eyesight, how do you know that the stool is normal? - Grins vrach.- Pass!
- It would have just said! And then ... what letter, which letter ...
Then a neurologist's office. Doctor hammer conscript a cup - again! Leg conscript twitches and a doctor in the chin - again! Neurologist scratching his chin:
- Nerves are good! But I have no good. Pass!
Conscript comes to the therapist.
- Undress to the waist!
Conscript undresses. The therapist says:
- I said to strip to the waist and not to cowards!
Conscript removes shorts and belt wears. The doctor and the nurse look at each other, but did not serve.
- Breathe! Do not breathe! Do not breathe! .. Complaints have?
- Yes, - said Dr. prizyvnik.-, as there is nothing to breathe!
Further office lore. The doctor looks throat.
- A-ah, - says a conscript.
Looks nose
- Mm-m, - moos inductee.
- And in the ear plug! - Says the doctor.
- Of champagne? It accompanied me to the army!
- Get away over there, check out the whispered speech. Four ...
- One hundred and fifty-four!
- Twelve ...
- One hundred and sixty-two!
- Why did you all the time 150 is added?
- To me, the army did not take, - says a conscript.
Further dentist.
- All teeth?
- No, not all, I still have a house.
- Be sure to take them with him to the army, - he says vrach.- Pass!
Then the surgeon's office.
- Bruises, fractures, dislocations?
- Doctor, everything is there! - Says a conscript.
- Very well, says hirurg.- So you do not get used. Complaints have?
- There is! I have flat feet!
The surgeon looks, takes off his sneakers, shows 2 iron:
- That's what needs to be flat! Pass!
Last psychiatrist. He rubs his hands together, winks, grunts, pulls his cheek, shoulder and leg simultaneously.
- Nn-uh, uh-young che-che-man ka-ka-like niches you in-the-doctors?
Conscript shrugs:
- Some crazy
Psychiatrist leans over and whispers in his ear:
- Uh-oh, this is it-to-mow for geeks, ch-ch-in-to-in the army is not s-zagremet.- He laughs and leaping dramatically smolkaet.- Pass!
