693
Play Cinderella
Piece for three persons.
SCENE I
Royal chambers. The chambers are three chairs Siamese coloring. The chairs idyat kings, princes and courtiers.
PRINCE: Is not it time to me, sir, to marry?
KING: (surprised looking at the Prince), Is you, my only son, my krovinochka?
PRINCE: Looks like it.
KING: Not likely.
PRINCE: Looks like talking.
KING: It's not like I know better. (to the court) Call the doctor.
The court rises from his chair and goes. It changes into the doctor and goes to the room.
DOCTOR: Who called the doctor?
PRINCE: (pointing to the king) He.
DOCTOR: (to the king) What do you have pain?
KING: I am not for myself.
DOCTOR: Late. (heals King)
PRINCE: The doctor, but from what you treat it?
DOCTOR: From the mind. From him all the grief.
PRINCE: Well treat. But what do you think, doctor, is not it time to marry me?
Dr. King ceases to be treated and stares at the prince. Then at the king.
DOCTOR: (King, pointing to the prince) You called for a doctor?
KING: (a stupidly) Yeah.
DOCTOR: Clear. (treats Prince).
King quietly goes out and changes into a queen. Included Queen.
QUEEN: What's going on?
DOCTOR: I'm flying.
QUEEN: Far?
DOCTOR: Very.
QUEEN: High?
DOCTOR: Quite.
QUEEN: You're the doctor, you see, an important bird.
DOCTOR: In other circles.
QUEEN: What about the prince?
DOCTOR: No one learns.
QUEEN: bullshit. (suitable to the prince). Sonny, it's me.
PRINCE: Dear Papa disguise.
DOCTOR: Well, you see ...
SCENE II.
Forest. In the forest trees. Included forester.
Foresters: Where is everyone?
Enter the gopher and squirrel.
Gophers: Hello squirrel.
Squirrel: Hello, gopher.
Foresters: Hello, squirrel, and ground squirrel.
Gophers and squirrels: (chorus) Zdravstvuem.
Foresters: What do you hear from the palace?
Gophers: As usual. Cry.
Squirrel Prince to marry thought up this morning.
Foresters: (thoughtfully) Well, sometimes helpful.
Gopher and bylochka out. Gopher changes into a squirrel, squirrel changes into a gopher. Enter a squirrel, and ground squirrel.
Squirrel: Hello, gopher.
Gophers: Hello squirrel.
Foresters: Hello, gopher.
Gopher: gopher I do not, I squirrel.
Squirrels (without waiting for the issue) I gopher.
m Forester comes with one hand dresses doctor. Included on the one hand the doctor, and on the other side of the forester ...
DOCTOR: Who's the squirrel?
Foresters: (pointing to the gopher) He.
DOCTOR: Clear. Security question: who is the gopher?
Foresters: (pointing to the squirrel) it.
DOCTOR: Clear. (heals itself).
SCENE III.
Room. In the room sits a wicked stepmother and her two evil daughters.
Stepmother: (nastily moving eyebrows) Ho-ho.
FIRST DAUGHTER: (threateningly spreading nostrils) Hehe.
SECOND DAUGHTER: (disgusting blinking). Haha.
Stepmother: Cinderella Call.
The first daughter comes out and dresses. Included gopher.
Gophers: Hello squirrel.
Stepmother: Go into the stump. I said - Cinderella.
Gopher leaves. Included gopher.
Gophers: Hello, mother.
Stepmother: What a farce?
Gophers: (quietly) details there.
Stepmother: Ba ...
The second daughter goes out and changes into a mouse. Included mouse.
MOUSE: Piiiii.
The mouse comes out. Back enters the second daughter.
Stepmother: Fuck.
Gopher: I'm here to do with it.
Stepmother: In the mess.
Gophers: Sam surprised.
The second daughter goes. Part of the doctor.
DOCTOR: Who is Cinderella?
Stepmother: (fearfully, pointing to the ground squirrel) He.
DOCTOR: That's right.
The doctor is out. Beginning the second daughter. Painful silence reigns.
Stepmother: So you say, come, my stepdaughter Cinderella?
Gophers: They called you, mama.
Stepmother: That's because ugorazdilo.
Gophers: Not every case.
Stepmother: Hmm. Well, Cinderella, you want the ball?
Gophers: Do you suppose mama gone crazy?
The second daughter goes. Part of the doctor.
DOCTOR: Who is crazy?
Stepmother: Not me.
Gopher: I did not.
Gopher out. Included squirrel.
Squirrel: I did not.
Squirrel leaves. Enter King.
KING: I do not.
King leaves. Included Prince.
PRINCE: And you did not marry me, Doctor?
DOCTOR: So you got caught. (treats Prince).
SCENE IV.
Garden. In the garden, sitting on a bench Cinderella, dressed in a gopher because there is no props. The air is then strum and there are little stars. Five pieces. Included fairy.
FAIRY: And here I am.
Gopher: I'm Cinderella. There is no simple props.
FAIRY: Oh ay-ay.
Gophers: What is to be done. Close your eyes and imagine that I was Cinderella.
FAIRY: Good. (closes her eyes) Well I can not see anything.
Part of the doctor.
Doctor: Hello.
FAIRY: Who's there?
DOCTOR: What do you think?
FAIRY: Cinderella.
DOCTOR: Do not guess.
FAIRY: Then gopher.
DOCTOR: Here it is, female logic. (fairy treats).
SCENE V.
Palace Square. In the area of leaves coach made from a pumpkin. The carriage harnessed squirrel, dressed as a horse. The carriage drives the doctor, dressed as a coachman. Included gopher in a ball gown.
Gophers: Oh, ball. I want to dance to it that the nymph.
Kucher: You came from, Durikov.
Gophers: What?
Coachman, Cinderella coach should sit.
Gophers: Sorry. (taken in the coach. From there, heard his voice.)
I want to dance, I like a nymph.
Squirrel: You can come out?
Kucher: You what?
Squirrel: I for a moment.
Kucher: One leg here, another there.
Squirrel leaves. Included fairy. Fairy knocks on the door of the carriage.
FAIRY: Who's there?
Gophers: This is me, Cinderella.
FAIRY: Very well. I've wanted to say something.
Gopher: I do with it?
FAIRY: You'll be as if my therapist.
Gophers: Well, go ahead.
FAIRY: At twelve o'clock your carriage turn into a pumpkin.
Gophers: What do you mean.
FAIRY: Exactly. And your horse turn into mice.
Gophers: How much?
FAIRY: At twelve.
Gophers: She's all alone.
FAIRY: Who?
Gophers: Horse. A turn to the twelve mice. Garbage is obtained.
FAIRY: Do not interrupt. And your driver will turn into a rat.
Kucher: I for a moment.
The driver comes out. Part of the doctor.
DOCTOR: rat, mouse, cockroaches eat?
FAIRY: Not yet. But not far off the hour.
DOCTOR: What a nightmare! (sprinkles all dichlorvos).
FAIRY: I feel faint.
DOCTOR: That's right. (fairy treats)
SCENE VI.
Dtsenadtsat hours. On the square is a pumpkin and the shoe. Enter the prince and the king.
PRINCE: What shoe!
KING: What a pumpkin!
PUMPKIN: (voice gopher) Help!
PRINCE: Who's there?
PUMPKIN: There gopher.
PRINCE: Where gopher?
PUMPKIN: Inside.
KING: And who in the shoe?
PUMPKIN: There is likely no gopher.
KING: But I see no reason.
PUMPKIN: This is the law of conservation of ground squirrels.
KING: And, well, of course.
PUMPKIN: Did anyone help?
PRINCE: Very doubtful.
PUMPKIN: Why?
PRINCE: Gophers - harmful rodents.
PUMPKIN: And exactly.
Pumpkin gnaw gopher. He wore a ball gown.
PRINCE: Why not fit?
Gopher: I'm Cinderella.
PRINCE: Is that sur?
Gophers: No, I just did not have enough props.
PRINCE: Well, then clear. Papa, bless us.
KING: Son, are you sure that this is not a gopher?
PRINCE: Absolutely.
King leaves. Enter Dr. disguised priest.
PRIEST: (Prince) Do you agree, the servant of God, marry Cinderella,
like a gopher in a ball gown?
PRINCE: It appears so.
Gophers: Not for long.
PRINCE: Why?
Gophers: Gophers live long.
PRINCE: I really thought something happened.
PRIEST: Do you understand?
PRINCE: Yes.
PRIEST: I now pronounce you husband and wife.
Gopher and the Prince come. Enter two orderlies.
Sanitation: You are the prince and were married a gopher?
PRIEST: I'll explain everything to you.
Sanitation: No, we are. (take away a priest).
END
SCENE I
Royal chambers. The chambers are three chairs Siamese coloring. The chairs idyat kings, princes and courtiers.
PRINCE: Is not it time to me, sir, to marry?
KING: (surprised looking at the Prince), Is you, my only son, my krovinochka?
PRINCE: Looks like it.
KING: Not likely.
PRINCE: Looks like talking.
KING: It's not like I know better. (to the court) Call the doctor.
The court rises from his chair and goes. It changes into the doctor and goes to the room.
DOCTOR: Who called the doctor?
PRINCE: (pointing to the king) He.
DOCTOR: (to the king) What do you have pain?
KING: I am not for myself.
DOCTOR: Late. (heals King)
PRINCE: The doctor, but from what you treat it?
DOCTOR: From the mind. From him all the grief.
PRINCE: Well treat. But what do you think, doctor, is not it time to marry me?
Dr. King ceases to be treated and stares at the prince. Then at the king.
DOCTOR: (King, pointing to the prince) You called for a doctor?
KING: (a stupidly) Yeah.
DOCTOR: Clear. (treats Prince).
King quietly goes out and changes into a queen. Included Queen.
QUEEN: What's going on?
DOCTOR: I'm flying.
QUEEN: Far?
DOCTOR: Very.
QUEEN: High?
DOCTOR: Quite.
QUEEN: You're the doctor, you see, an important bird.
DOCTOR: In other circles.
QUEEN: What about the prince?
DOCTOR: No one learns.
QUEEN: bullshit. (suitable to the prince). Sonny, it's me.
PRINCE: Dear Papa disguise.
DOCTOR: Well, you see ...
SCENE II.
Forest. In the forest trees. Included forester.
Foresters: Where is everyone?
Enter the gopher and squirrel.
Gophers: Hello squirrel.
Squirrel: Hello, gopher.
Foresters: Hello, squirrel, and ground squirrel.
Gophers and squirrels: (chorus) Zdravstvuem.
Foresters: What do you hear from the palace?
Gophers: As usual. Cry.
Squirrel Prince to marry thought up this morning.
Foresters: (thoughtfully) Well, sometimes helpful.
Gopher and bylochka out. Gopher changes into a squirrel, squirrel changes into a gopher. Enter a squirrel, and ground squirrel.
Squirrel: Hello, gopher.
Gophers: Hello squirrel.
Foresters: Hello, gopher.
Gopher: gopher I do not, I squirrel.
Squirrels (without waiting for the issue) I gopher.
m Forester comes with one hand dresses doctor. Included on the one hand the doctor, and on the other side of the forester ...
DOCTOR: Who's the squirrel?
Foresters: (pointing to the gopher) He.
DOCTOR: Clear. Security question: who is the gopher?
Foresters: (pointing to the squirrel) it.
DOCTOR: Clear. (heals itself).
SCENE III.
Room. In the room sits a wicked stepmother and her two evil daughters.
Stepmother: (nastily moving eyebrows) Ho-ho.
FIRST DAUGHTER: (threateningly spreading nostrils) Hehe.
SECOND DAUGHTER: (disgusting blinking). Haha.
Stepmother: Cinderella Call.
The first daughter comes out and dresses. Included gopher.
Gophers: Hello squirrel.
Stepmother: Go into the stump. I said - Cinderella.
Gopher leaves. Included gopher.
Gophers: Hello, mother.
Stepmother: What a farce?
Gophers: (quietly) details there.
Stepmother: Ba ...
The second daughter goes out and changes into a mouse. Included mouse.
MOUSE: Piiiii.
The mouse comes out. Back enters the second daughter.
Stepmother: Fuck.
Gopher: I'm here to do with it.
Stepmother: In the mess.
Gophers: Sam surprised.
The second daughter goes. Part of the doctor.
DOCTOR: Who is Cinderella?
Stepmother: (fearfully, pointing to the ground squirrel) He.
DOCTOR: That's right.
The doctor is out. Beginning the second daughter. Painful silence reigns.
Stepmother: So you say, come, my stepdaughter Cinderella?
Gophers: They called you, mama.
Stepmother: That's because ugorazdilo.
Gophers: Not every case.
Stepmother: Hmm. Well, Cinderella, you want the ball?
Gophers: Do you suppose mama gone crazy?
The second daughter goes. Part of the doctor.
DOCTOR: Who is crazy?
Stepmother: Not me.
Gopher: I did not.
Gopher out. Included squirrel.
Squirrel: I did not.
Squirrel leaves. Enter King.
KING: I do not.
King leaves. Included Prince.
PRINCE: And you did not marry me, Doctor?
DOCTOR: So you got caught. (treats Prince).
SCENE IV.
Garden. In the garden, sitting on a bench Cinderella, dressed in a gopher because there is no props. The air is then strum and there are little stars. Five pieces. Included fairy.
FAIRY: And here I am.
Gopher: I'm Cinderella. There is no simple props.
FAIRY: Oh ay-ay.
Gophers: What is to be done. Close your eyes and imagine that I was Cinderella.
FAIRY: Good. (closes her eyes) Well I can not see anything.
Part of the doctor.
Doctor: Hello.
FAIRY: Who's there?
DOCTOR: What do you think?
FAIRY: Cinderella.
DOCTOR: Do not guess.
FAIRY: Then gopher.
DOCTOR: Here it is, female logic. (fairy treats).
SCENE V.
Palace Square. In the area of leaves coach made from a pumpkin. The carriage harnessed squirrel, dressed as a horse. The carriage drives the doctor, dressed as a coachman. Included gopher in a ball gown.
Gophers: Oh, ball. I want to dance to it that the nymph.
Kucher: You came from, Durikov.
Gophers: What?
Coachman, Cinderella coach should sit.
Gophers: Sorry. (taken in the coach. From there, heard his voice.)
I want to dance, I like a nymph.
Squirrel: You can come out?
Kucher: You what?
Squirrel: I for a moment.
Kucher: One leg here, another there.
Squirrel leaves. Included fairy. Fairy knocks on the door of the carriage.
FAIRY: Who's there?
Gophers: This is me, Cinderella.
FAIRY: Very well. I've wanted to say something.
Gopher: I do with it?
FAIRY: You'll be as if my therapist.
Gophers: Well, go ahead.
FAIRY: At twelve o'clock your carriage turn into a pumpkin.
Gophers: What do you mean.
FAIRY: Exactly. And your horse turn into mice.
Gophers: How much?
FAIRY: At twelve.
Gophers: She's all alone.
FAIRY: Who?
Gophers: Horse. A turn to the twelve mice. Garbage is obtained.
FAIRY: Do not interrupt. And your driver will turn into a rat.
Kucher: I for a moment.
The driver comes out. Part of the doctor.
DOCTOR: rat, mouse, cockroaches eat?
FAIRY: Not yet. But not far off the hour.
DOCTOR: What a nightmare! (sprinkles all dichlorvos).
FAIRY: I feel faint.
DOCTOR: That's right. (fairy treats)
SCENE VI.
Dtsenadtsat hours. On the square is a pumpkin and the shoe. Enter the prince and the king.
PRINCE: What shoe!
KING: What a pumpkin!
PUMPKIN: (voice gopher) Help!
PRINCE: Who's there?
PUMPKIN: There gopher.
PRINCE: Where gopher?
PUMPKIN: Inside.
KING: And who in the shoe?
PUMPKIN: There is likely no gopher.
KING: But I see no reason.
PUMPKIN: This is the law of conservation of ground squirrels.
KING: And, well, of course.
PUMPKIN: Did anyone help?
PRINCE: Very doubtful.
PUMPKIN: Why?
PRINCE: Gophers - harmful rodents.
PUMPKIN: And exactly.
Pumpkin gnaw gopher. He wore a ball gown.
PRINCE: Why not fit?
Gopher: I'm Cinderella.
PRINCE: Is that sur?
Gophers: No, I just did not have enough props.
PRINCE: Well, then clear. Papa, bless us.
KING: Son, are you sure that this is not a gopher?
PRINCE: Absolutely.
King leaves. Enter Dr. disguised priest.
PRIEST: (Prince) Do you agree, the servant of God, marry Cinderella,
like a gopher in a ball gown?
PRINCE: It appears so.
Gophers: Not for long.
PRINCE: Why?
Gophers: Gophers live long.
PRINCE: I really thought something happened.
PRIEST: Do you understand?
PRINCE: Yes.
PRIEST: I now pronounce you husband and wife.
Gopher and the Prince come. Enter two orderlies.
Sanitation: You are the prince and were married a gopher?
PRIEST: I'll explain everything to you.
Sanitation: No, we are. (take away a priest).
END
