Here is the story of a school teacher who was faced with a rare nowadays proper upbringing of his father's nine-year-daughter. According to most of the other parents father was a tyrant, despot and a tyrant, and that after reading you say? In the 4th grade student Masha - a girl from a large family. She is the eldest of four children, there is still a brother and two sisters. None of the extra-curricular activities a girl does not participate. For example, when the initial classes traveled by bus to tour the park, Masha did not go with us. I asked her friends why no Masha, and the girls began vying with Twitter that Masha is very strict father, he does not let her go.
"My mother asked that Masha was released on my birthday, but her dad does not allow," - said Anna. "And on my birthday it was not allowed!" - Grabbed Vick. - My mom says Masha they like Cinderella. Doing homework, but do not let her walk ».
I was surprised and decided to find out what is going on in the machine family. This class I just got - their teacher went on maternity leave, and I do not know all parents. Go straight home to Masha checking I did not want, and I decided to first porassprosit moms Ani and Vicki.
"Strict? Yes, he's just a tyrant! - Mom said Ani. - My daughter came to visit Masha, we live on the same street, at home there, so he sent it back. Saying, Go and tell your mother that you wore it. You can not go naked. Can you imagine? Anya was in a T-shirt and shorts. Is nine-year child in the summer heat can not walk so? »
"Dad Masha despot - Mama Vicki sighed. - I feel sorry for the girl. If he's a tyrant, what will happen when Mary will be a girl? He wears a veil on her? »
I decided to watch Masha.
Girl pleasant appearance - tall, slender, beautiful face with a slight blush (in the big city is not often you see ruddy baby!). A student is engaged in a collective folk dance and the Drawing circle at the school. This is contrary to the words, as if it loaded homework as Cinderella. And dressed like all the girls in the form of school: plaid pleated skirt, blouse and vest or jacket.
Stop, stop, and a skirt Masha with a secret! Folds scribbling below the hips. This skirt accidentally zaderet and will fly if the wind does not rise higher than his head. Ah yes, Dad! I was surprised and could not help smiling. Another week of observation, during which I noted and permanent hair - plait braided classically, as a child of my mother, and no zakolochek and baubles, loved other girls, and even the always quiet voice, as if Mary tried to keep quiet, and not only in the classroom but also to change when other kids yelled, screamed and cried as cut.
I wanted to see the car mother. Just then appeared in time the next event, which Masha, of course, was not allowed. It was a craft exhibition "Golden Autumn" for the students of classes 3 and 4, followed by a disco. Elegant children danced, pulling juice from the bags and having fun. Teachers and several members of the parent committee watched the children. "Well, what is dangerous for Maria? - I thought. - To deny the girl's simple pleasures. Look how her friends vykamarivayut. Maybe it's true father - home tyrant? »
On Monday, I wrote a diary in the car for my mother's request to come to school.
What do you think, who came to the school? Of course, Dad Machines - "tyrant" and "despot." Man forties. He teaches at a technical college, associate professor. The tall, bald, military bearing, gray eyes, gaze. I involuntarily straightened her blouse and straightened. He explained that his wife, mother of four young children, is unable to go to school. What happened?
His appearance was quite adequate, and I decided not to bow and scrape, and asked him on the forehead, why Mary does not happen in the extra-curricular activities, why not let her on birthdays girlfriends. He smiled sarcastically and said he strongly opposed the school discos, excursions in the forest zone and "walking on the hut." Nowadays, the situation is potentially dangerous for the child.
His daughter attends two circles, that is enough for a harmonious development. Yes, Masha forbidden to go on a visit to the other girls. After all, he can not be sure where she would be safe. However, he was not opposed to the girls came to their house and played with Masha under the supervision of his wife. And on the car's birthday they always invite her friends.
- Why, then, you literally kicked Anya? You do not like the fact that she was wearing shorts? All girls summer wear shorts.
- Listen, - he again smiled unpleasantly, - I am opposed to the girl let out of the house in such short pants that are half the buttocks protrude. A T-shirt with armholes so that they can be seen through the stomach. And I drove Anna, says her mother, and brought the arm to the gate of her house. You as a teacher think I did wrong?
I was silent, thinking that he had to answer. Basically, I was with him in solidarity. Modern moms sometimes so bare his little daughters, which for them is frightening.
- Masha also has shorts, if you are so important - he said sarcastically. - But it is shorts, not melting. And she wears a sleeveless summer in which to raise their hands, without showing the navel.
- And the folds of the skirt at the school it is you scribbling? - I could not resist.
- Not me, of course, mom.
- But you tell my mother?
He laughed again, this time good-naturedly.
- My wife and I are the same views on the education of the daughters.
- And what does Mary around the house? What are its responsibilities? You know that girl her name is Cinderella?
- Masha cleans the room, where he lives with his sister, and washes the dishes after dinner. Well it helps mom when she asks. Flowers watering the yard. In my opinion, Cinderella does not pull.
- Agree. But do not you think that too much austerity, banned from attending school disco can backfire in adolescence?
- But why Masha get used to this disco? You know that in high school is a place where young people sell drugs? She's dancing three times a week in the circle of folk dance. It is much better for the girls - formed the correct posture, grace. And in discos, they pounded on the same site as the possessed. Music thunders, lays his ears. What are the benefits for children?
- But ...
- Look, I want to raise two daughters in the main quality necessary for every woman - modesty and diligence. And if the school does not help me in this, then at least do not interfere.
The conversation has dried up. He left again please me growth and bearing, and left a mixed feeling in my heart. On the one hand, I wanted to Masha had fun at school matinees and discos, went to a class on a field trip. But on the other hand, Machine Pope in many respects. What a pity that he was not even trying to find a middle ground! But after talking with him, I had a topic of conversation with mothers of girls.
Inviting them to a meeting, a bachelorette party! Go and get acquainted.
COLLECTION FOR MOMS
A week before the meeting, I distributed leaflets with the two female students to the issues of their mothers:
1. What is your understanding of "maiden modesty»?
2. You want your daughter to be modest?
And that meeting. Mom gave me a fourth-filled leaves, and took their places at their desks. I guess I passed on Bacillus Puritanism from the machine Pope, because I frowned at the two moms who just dumped their charms on the desk. What is at the neckline blouse? Honestly, in this perspective, half-naked female breast becomes like a *** for zu. Then I said, many war paint - too bright flashy makeup, absurd huge barrettes in her hair, shiny costumes (that they have to go to work?). The eye rested on three or four women dressed simply and tastefully, with normal hair styles. I tried to guess where his mother Maria. Behind the desk sat a girl other moms, I knew them. Probably, that's the palely woman without makeup. She was about forty. Face tired - still, four children!
But I did not guess. Masha's mother was a young, no more than 30 years, the blue faded jeans and jumper, brown hair gathered in a long tail. One of those on whom rested my critical eye. Ah yes Machine Dad! This belle chose! A four children - is probably its guarantee to keep at home a young wife. So still a despot? ..
I began to conduct a meeting. First reminded mothers that their daughter at that age, when the baby turns into a big girls. We must carefully monitor their appearance and behavior. For example, some of the girls in the class grew out of their skirts and look immodest. And when the pack lifts the already short skirt seams are visible even in the pantyhose. I would also like the girls to behave more modestly in the classroom and their behavior set an example worthy of the boys, and not to provoke them into rudeness.
In his address, I stressed that we are not talking about the inner humility (not to stick out their "I" does not ascribe to themselves the merits of others, to be able, if necessary, to retreat into the background, to show tact, do comment adults do not argue with them). It is a purely external signs. Of course, for a modest shell may be hiding even rudeness. And they can not all be modest and Tikhonov. And it is not necessary. Adorable character - a girl and a little devil t. D. The main thing is that the behavior did not go beyond the bounds of propriety. Without naming names, I said the bad behavior of some of the girls in the class (name-calling, using offensive language, pushing). Along the way, he said that every girl needs to develop femininity (posture, gait). A good method for doing this - gymnastics, dance.
Then I read out the answers aloud mothers (without naming names), some we have discussed (without shouting and disputes not done). Many mothers formally approached and responded just two words. But few people have set out their views, and I am very pleased. Here are excerpts of the most interesting responses.
ANSWERS TO QUESTIONS FROM MOM:
As a child I was very shy girl. My mother worked as a teacher in our school, and she was very afraid that colleagues do not reproach her daughter in a bad upbringing. So I had to look at the lessons diligently in his mouth teacher at recess to go toe the line, at school events recite poems about nature, while the other girls sing cheerful songs or short skirts pranced around the stage. How I envied them, this, according to my mother, "flirt"! As an adult, long hesitated to express their opinions and participate in the general conversation. So I raise my daughter differently. She at me and singing and dancing, never shy, and beauty contests, I carried with her 6 years. I do not want her to grow umnyashechkoy-skromnyashechkoy. Let it be bright, even laughing loudly, even lifts his feet in the dance! In my understanding, humility - is not lowered his head submissively and eternal silence. Therefore let my daughter looks better immodest than the downtrodden, as I in my childhood. And about girlish pride and honor I tell her a couple of years.
Girlish modesty - it's a trick, which peck stupid man. Girl all so quiet, modest, and is getting married, and walking to and fro. The still waters run deep. I do not like prudes, do not believe them. His daughter did not swear for laughter or painted lip gloss.
I do not like the behavior of the three girls in the class (everyone knows who he is). They are very noisy, rude, indiscreet. Often I am watching them when we go from school: shouting in the street, laugh loudly (can you say - neigh like horses). I try to take Sasha's hand and take away, to not even go near this company. I have a daughter modest (know how to behave in public).
Karina still small, is behaving like a child. I do not think it immodest, so the problem with that we have. But the eldest daughter (s 16) I explain that in our time to stand out and to please the girl should be modest. Immodest already tired. I'll tell you about one case. Last summer we had a rest on the sea in Europe. On the beach the majority of girls and women sunbathing topless. Only a few men looked at their charms - and often a smirk, not to lust after (used to!). And then I accidentally noticed that all the men of the company next to us look carefully to one side. I followed the direction and saw a girl who was trying to take off from the top of a wet bathing suit and a T-shirt to wear, without showing his chest. With one hand she held a towel on the breast, the second pulls together a bra, then took a T-shirt and pulled it with one hand. In men who stared at her, his eyes lit so! On the beach, one shy attracted more male attention than all the half-naked girls! For me, this scene made a lasting impression.
For example, our dad can not stand demure. He likes lively woman. Even so there is a saying: "The girl decorates modesty, if there is no other virtues." In general, in our time to be modest silly - you just do not notice.
Dear teacher! Do not attempt to turn an ordinary school Institute for Noble Maidens. Let the knowledge and behavior daughter will understand ourselves.
For me the important thing is to trust my daughter. If I constantly hammer away at her, so she behaved quietly and modestly, my child will turn into a wooden doll. Who needs it? I do not want to bother until she had the baby. I think the question of girlish modesty would be relevant only in a few years.
I want my daughter to be sly, and teach her that. Cunning girl is always on your mind, it is more secure than the open. Behave modestly - it too cunning. So I often say to Stas that she was modest, not to run (only daughter does not always listen to it in my battle!).
I used to be required by a daughter, so she behaved modestly - did not fight, do not call. Only here the other girls in the class - such brazen that can humble and crush. So now I teach her to defend himself - and snapping to taunt. Let it even immodest.
We try to bring Masha so that its behavior does not lead to trouble for her same. Girlish modesty in my understanding - is primarily education. I really want to get my three girls were modest. It is a great joy and pride for the parents.
RESULTS OF THE MEETING
Once again stipulating that the theme of the meeting - only the behavior of girls, but not their inner world, we have formulated together with their mothers seven external signs of indiscreet behavior of schoolgirls. In our common view, modest girl should not:
1) disclose in laughter wide mouth and a gaggle - it is vulgar;
2) sitting on a chair, push your knees, boys;
3) wear clothing that exposes the child's body, or in which a little girl looks sexy;
4) be untidy;
5) rude and talk too loud, foul language, fight;
6) rude to elders, to argue with them;
7) slander and gossip about other children.
In general, mothers were satisfied: by most accounts, it was a useful meeting. And I remembered the old saying: "Modesty daughter - the wealth of his father" and said thank you mentally Masha's strict father. His daughter liked me more. Among the many, frankly, not on age and overdressed cheeky fourth-it looked like a lovely lady Pushkin times. Carefully braid braided, clear view, good posture, correct it quietly, freshness, neatness. Natural beauty girl discreet harmony with her upbringing and courtesy. The charm of modesty - so I wanted to say about Masha. And I would like to sincerely thank the parents for the upbringing of his daughter.