10 dumbest criminals

10th place:
A young American mother, was arrested during skautstkogo rally, which was attended by her son. While she was looking at how the cop shows kids job dragged on drug detection dogs, the dog found in her handbag bag with grass.
Next ...

9th place:
Young man with a shotgun entered the store and demanded cash from the cash register. Once the money has been immersed in a bag, he saw a large bottle of whiskey, and demanded to add it to the money, but received a refusal from the seller, the seller had doubts that the robber has reached 21 years. After some wrangling, the robber took out a driver's license and showed them to the seller, who, after careful study, agreed with the appropriateness of receiving a bottle of alcohol and packed in a bag. What they parted. However, we parted briefly, because two hours later the robber was taken by the police in his apartment, because the seller said the name and address specified in the Rights!

8th place:
A lady called the police a statement about the theft of the machine, at the same time saying that the car was a mobile phone. The officer telephoned and said that, they say, an ad in the newspaper and had long dreamed of such a wheelbarrow. Appointment. Met. The arrest, court, jail.

7th place:
Decided to an American citizen to rob a bank. I went to the Bank of America, and in the form of deposit scribbled something like "This agrablenie, zosunte all the pocket money," then humbly stood in line to the window. But then visited his doubts, and suddenly someone had seen and what he wrote? Maybe the police have caused? And he left the bank and went across the street to Wells Fargo Bank. The queue there was a lot less, and that he desired a moment: our hero holds the note to a girl - to the operator. The operator, clever girl, spelling decided that the robber is clearly the mind does not shine, and calmly told him that the note can not accept, because it is written on the letterhead of Bank of America, and here Wells Fargo. Because he can rewrite it in the form Wells Fargo or return to the Bank of America. Lightly distressed robber, oddly enough, left the bank, and she immediately called the police. Five minutes later he was taken. Guess where? Right across the street, in the queue to the window BoA.

6th place:
A British driver was automatically detect radar. After a while he got in the mail a receipt from the police on 40 pounds and photo of your car. Instead of paying, it just sent to the police photos of 40 pounds. A few days later, he again received an envelope in which the photo was again, this time photo: handcuffs. Artistic force this photo turned out to be fantastic - the receipt was paid on the same day.

5th place:
At the trial in Michigan, the defendant in the case of drug possession Christopher Jansen said that he was searched without a warrant. The prosecutor said that the jacket Jansen at the time of the search in a strange bulge, and the officer had suspicions that the gun under his jacket, and in this case he did not need a warrant. "Nonsense" - said Jansen - "I'm in the same jacket that when and where to hide a gun here? "With that, he took off his jacket and gave it to the judge. And who found in his jacket pocket a package of cocaine. The meeting had to take a break, because five minutes the judge could hardly sit with laughter.

4th place:
Oklahoma: Accused in the case of armed robbery Dennis Newton sent to hell with his lawyer and began to defend himself, and he even very well it worked as the prosecutor did not call the witness - lady, raking the store manager, who identified him. Dennis jumped up, accused the witness of lying, and in the hearts said, "I wish I had not shot off your empty head off! "True then quickly added: -" If, of course, I was there: "We the jury took only 20 minutes to decide that 30 years will be just right!

3rd place:
Detroit: Walking young man drew attention to the police squad, which showed the district children a new computer installed in their patrol car. When asked how this thing works, the police took him and began to drive in the right data. After a few seconds the poor fellow was tied by all the rules, because the computer screen accused him of armed robbery, committed two years ago in St. Louis, Missouri.

2nd place:
Again Detroit: A pair of robbers broke into the record store, the muzzles of revolvers nerve leading from side to side. One of them shouted: "Nobody move !!!" When his partner jerked to the checkout, true to his word, he shot his partner.

Finally, place 1 - Winner:
An American gentleman bought a box of very rare and expensive cigars. Such expensive and rare that it even has insured them, among other things, from the fire. A month later, the cigar is already over, and he had not even made the first payment under the policy. This did not prevent him to apply to the insurance company, a statement that the cigars were lost due to "a series of small fires" (here it is necessary to understand that in English "fire" and "fire" refers to a single word fire - note, the translator). The company refused to pay, a reasonable answer, that, in fact, he used the cigar in the most natural way for cigars. Well, Mr. went to court and won the case. In the judgment the judge acknowledged that the claim is, quite frankly, not serious, but at the same time, the available policy, cigars are insured against fire, and this policy does not define "desirable" or "affordability" of any kinds of fire. So insurers should pay. Insurers did not bother with the long and costly appeals and paid $ 15,000 for the "burnt" cigars. However, to enjoy the new Freestuff cigars failed because immediately after receiving the cash by check this gentleman was arrested. On the basis of the same insurance policy and their own testimony at the trial, he was charged with 24 episodes of deliberate destruction of insured property through arson. The result of the new process - 24 months in prison and a fine of $ 24,000 ...