22
When I gave birth to the baby, our whole family idyll evaporated, and my parents left me to fend for myself.
The woman who gave birth to the childThey have certain prerogatives in the family. At least that's what people think. This is the birth of an heir to her and her husband. This is a very strong blow to health and a completely new model of behavior in the future: now you need to take care of the child, feed, dress, educate. An ordinary childless spouse, all this fuss is simply unknown and inaccessible.
However, if everything is clear with the duties, it is also important to understand what rights the new mother has. But it's not that simple anymore. Let’s forget that women’s rights are quite different from country to country. Everyone knows that. What is the situation in the average family? Well, even here it all depends. Especially the financial situation of her and her husband. In the second - from the established relationship within the couple. In other words, as husband and wife agree, so it will be. But is that fair, as you personally think?
My story is nothing but a cry for help. No, my dear ones, calm down. I'm not asking anyone for any money. I just want to share with you what I came to at 28. And if you're lucky, get some good advice from knowledgeable people. Because I never thought family life was like this. Although I did not believe in fairy tales before, I could not even think that in reality everything is this way.
In my youth and after twenty years, I did not go to clubs, I did not look for a boyfriend. I didn’t want to trade for trifles and waited for my fate to find me. All this time I studied and lived with my parents. It was good because I have no brothers or sisters. So there was room for everyone. I didn't want to move anywhere. Why live alone when mom and dad help you out?
Young man But then, by accident, I met Oleg. Beautiful, well-mannered guy, 2 years older than me. He was able to care for more than half of his peers. I am not ashamed to talk about my work in the office. And by the clothes it was clear that he had money, and this, no matter what, plus. I worked in music school, too. But the salary, like any teacher these days, was meager. So I'm not used to spending money.
We quickly got together, dating for about a year and a half. Honestly, they flew so imperceptibly that I did not even have time to come to my senses when Oleg handed me a ring and got on one knee. Before that, we traveled, shared our thoughts, but we didn’t live together. So I was a little scared of where it had taken us. Adult life, you know. But I said yes. Our parents had already met by then, and both sides had agreed to the wedding.
I wanted a memorable solemn part for myself. Therefore, to the money allocated to us for the holiday, added the amount received from the loan. We're young, we'll pull. There will be nothing to remember in old age. We were given an apartment for a wedding gift. One-bedroom, but with repairs. I was satisfied with everything at the time. Large bathroom, half-wall TV, modern wardrobes and table. It's all right.
The woman who gave birth to a child And yes, I confess, six months we lived with Oleg soul to soul. We walked a lot, cooked together, even the neighbors always told us what a beautiful couple of us. My husband shared everything with me, and I never asked him for money. He simply put some money on the table at the beginning of the month, and I could use it as I wished. This is what every normal man should do to his woman.
But then I got pregnant. And that was the beginning of the catastrophe that is happening in my life right now. First of all, Oleg has changed quite dramatically in character. He kept coming late from work because we needed more money. I naturally swelled. So now I was wearing a stretched tracksuit and couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror. It makes sense that I need more money to maintain my beauty. To my surprise, Oleg refused. Because of the same savings.
Of course, I have a typical “pregnancy vagaries”. I wanted one and the other. And you know what? It is only in romantic melodramas that a husband, at the first call of his wife, who is expecting a child, goes to the other end of the city for “the same” cakes. In reality, he turns to the other side and continues to snore. An extra bouquet of wilted roses or a box of candy was like a holiday to me.
And when Arina was born, things got even worse. I did not lose weight, so this problem remained relevant to me. Money became even less, and after all, the husband promised that he was about to be sent to a new position. I'm sorry, we're not close. And even to the usual home routine added many times more business with a little daughter. Washing, cooking, walking to the supermarket for food. Where is this romance that used to be in the air? After all, a woman who gave birth to a child also needs attention.
Peels Help and support So, moreover, I was betrayed by my parents. Naturally, with the advent of the child, our family simply catastrophically began to lack space in the apartment. Two adults and a baby. And all in the same room. Isn't that normal? I tried to get my mom and dad to move to the country house. At least for a couple of years until Arina grows up. But they turned me down. They, you see, are uncomfortable moving there in winter when it's cold and damp. Only in the summer, when it's warm. But can't you buy a heater, live a little village life? For my granddaughter. Not for nothing.
I do not want to talk about my mother-in-law and mother-in-law, they immediately refused, and the topic was closed. That's how we live: in tightness, on each other. The first domestic quarrels appeared. I don't even know if they're domestic. Oleg, for example, can afford a couple of times a month to go to a bar with friends on Friday. I don't have that opportunity at all. It's a shame, my daughter is ours.
Peels, so I'll tell you how it is. Family life is not sugar at all. I had no idea how many nuances there were. I looked at the future through rose-colored glasses. I have friends who also have children. So are they as suffering as I am, but just not showing up? I would like to know how to improve my situation. Otherwise, I don't even know. Divorce and find a better man? He knows how to make his wife happy, no matter what.
However, if everything is clear with the duties, it is also important to understand what rights the new mother has. But it's not that simple anymore. Let’s forget that women’s rights are quite different from country to country. Everyone knows that. What is the situation in the average family? Well, even here it all depends. Especially the financial situation of her and her husband. In the second - from the established relationship within the couple. In other words, as husband and wife agree, so it will be. But is that fair, as you personally think?
My story is nothing but a cry for help. No, my dear ones, calm down. I'm not asking anyone for any money. I just want to share with you what I came to at 28. And if you're lucky, get some good advice from knowledgeable people. Because I never thought family life was like this. Although I did not believe in fairy tales before, I could not even think that in reality everything is this way.
In my youth and after twenty years, I did not go to clubs, I did not look for a boyfriend. I didn’t want to trade for trifles and waited for my fate to find me. All this time I studied and lived with my parents. It was good because I have no brothers or sisters. So there was room for everyone. I didn't want to move anywhere. Why live alone when mom and dad help you out?
Young man But then, by accident, I met Oleg. Beautiful, well-mannered guy, 2 years older than me. He was able to care for more than half of his peers. I am not ashamed to talk about my work in the office. And by the clothes it was clear that he had money, and this, no matter what, plus. I worked in music school, too. But the salary, like any teacher these days, was meager. So I'm not used to spending money.
We quickly got together, dating for about a year and a half. Honestly, they flew so imperceptibly that I did not even have time to come to my senses when Oleg handed me a ring and got on one knee. Before that, we traveled, shared our thoughts, but we didn’t live together. So I was a little scared of where it had taken us. Adult life, you know. But I said yes. Our parents had already met by then, and both sides had agreed to the wedding.
I wanted a memorable solemn part for myself. Therefore, to the money allocated to us for the holiday, added the amount received from the loan. We're young, we'll pull. There will be nothing to remember in old age. We were given an apartment for a wedding gift. One-bedroom, but with repairs. I was satisfied with everything at the time. Large bathroom, half-wall TV, modern wardrobes and table. It's all right.
The woman who gave birth to a child And yes, I confess, six months we lived with Oleg soul to soul. We walked a lot, cooked together, even the neighbors always told us what a beautiful couple of us. My husband shared everything with me, and I never asked him for money. He simply put some money on the table at the beginning of the month, and I could use it as I wished. This is what every normal man should do to his woman.
But then I got pregnant. And that was the beginning of the catastrophe that is happening in my life right now. First of all, Oleg has changed quite dramatically in character. He kept coming late from work because we needed more money. I naturally swelled. So now I was wearing a stretched tracksuit and couldn’t even look at myself in the mirror. It makes sense that I need more money to maintain my beauty. To my surprise, Oleg refused. Because of the same savings.
Of course, I have a typical “pregnancy vagaries”. I wanted one and the other. And you know what? It is only in romantic melodramas that a husband, at the first call of his wife, who is expecting a child, goes to the other end of the city for “the same” cakes. In reality, he turns to the other side and continues to snore. An extra bouquet of wilted roses or a box of candy was like a holiday to me.
And when Arina was born, things got even worse. I did not lose weight, so this problem remained relevant to me. Money became even less, and after all, the husband promised that he was about to be sent to a new position. I'm sorry, we're not close. And even to the usual home routine added many times more business with a little daughter. Washing, cooking, walking to the supermarket for food. Where is this romance that used to be in the air? After all, a woman who gave birth to a child also needs attention.
Peels Help and support So, moreover, I was betrayed by my parents. Naturally, with the advent of the child, our family simply catastrophically began to lack space in the apartment. Two adults and a baby. And all in the same room. Isn't that normal? I tried to get my mom and dad to move to the country house. At least for a couple of years until Arina grows up. But they turned me down. They, you see, are uncomfortable moving there in winter when it's cold and damp. Only in the summer, when it's warm. But can't you buy a heater, live a little village life? For my granddaughter. Not for nothing.
I do not want to talk about my mother-in-law and mother-in-law, they immediately refused, and the topic was closed. That's how we live: in tightness, on each other. The first domestic quarrels appeared. I don't even know if they're domestic. Oleg, for example, can afford a couple of times a month to go to a bar with friends on Friday. I don't have that opportunity at all. It's a shame, my daughter is ours.
Peels, so I'll tell you how it is. Family life is not sugar at all. I had no idea how many nuances there were. I looked at the future through rose-colored glasses. I have friends who also have children. So are they as suffering as I am, but just not showing up? I would like to know how to improve my situation. Otherwise, I don't even know. Divorce and find a better man? He knows how to make his wife happy, no matter what.
I took a roll of cheap film and pasted on all the windows, all winter I know no troubles.
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