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How to calm an annoying husband after a divorce
It is said that from love to hate one step. Until recently, two people adored each other, and today they are even under the same roof. But if some manage to accept it, then others do not dare to start a new life after a while. They even have to turn to psychologists to understand what to do after a divorce and how to live on.
What to do after a divorce "On her own initiative divorced her husband a year and a half ago. There are two daughters. The eldest adores his father and lives with him, the youngest lives with me. But my ex never leaves me alone. Often comes to see the younger, but does not even pay attention to her. He follows me on his heels, wants to return the relationship, says 28-year-old Natalia.
“I’ve been tired of him and his helplessness for 8 years together. All my household and financial chores were on me. Today, I can even repair the car myself. What I can’t do is help my friends. I don’t want to solve my ex-husband’s problems again. But it seems that it is not easy to get rid of him, the young woman resents.
“The situation is not easy, but it needs to be solved.” After all, this problem deprives you of energy, which is better spent on yourself and your daughters, which can be spent on improving the standard of living and finding a new love, says psychologist Irina Maslova.
“Try to recall your childhood to find a pattern of behavior similar to that between you and your ex-spouse. Maybe you didn’t get enough support from your parents that made you decide on your own.
“If a husband acts like a victim, if he asks and demands, then that too can be part of your personal experience. Remember when you were younger, you also tried to shift some of your responsibilities to other shoulders. Realize that your husband is at the same level today as you were years ago.”
“Understanding the real situation will help you define boundaries clearly. And if you are fully confident in your desires and intentions, you can respond with a firm refusal and stop making concessions to him.”
“I would also recommend adding something new to your life that will give you joy and nourish you with energy. Fatigue is bad, because now it is important for you to gain strength. Allow yourself to relax and have fun, even if you can only set aside a couple of hours a week. Bright colors will help to recover and establish a personal life, said the specialist.
If a divorce has already happened and the woman has not regretted this decision in a year and a half, then it means that it was right. Therefore, it remains only to get out of the networks of the past and move forward more decisively. The main thing is to clearly define personal boundaries and allow new worthy people into life.
What to do after a divorce "On her own initiative divorced her husband a year and a half ago. There are two daughters. The eldest adores his father and lives with him, the youngest lives with me. But my ex never leaves me alone. Often comes to see the younger, but does not even pay attention to her. He follows me on his heels, wants to return the relationship, says 28-year-old Natalia.
“I’ve been tired of him and his helplessness for 8 years together. All my household and financial chores were on me. Today, I can even repair the car myself. What I can’t do is help my friends. I don’t want to solve my ex-husband’s problems again. But it seems that it is not easy to get rid of him, the young woman resents.
“The situation is not easy, but it needs to be solved.” After all, this problem deprives you of energy, which is better spent on yourself and your daughters, which can be spent on improving the standard of living and finding a new love, says psychologist Irina Maslova.
“Try to recall your childhood to find a pattern of behavior similar to that between you and your ex-spouse. Maybe you didn’t get enough support from your parents that made you decide on your own.
“If a husband acts like a victim, if he asks and demands, then that too can be part of your personal experience. Remember when you were younger, you also tried to shift some of your responsibilities to other shoulders. Realize that your husband is at the same level today as you were years ago.”
“Understanding the real situation will help you define boundaries clearly. And if you are fully confident in your desires and intentions, you can respond with a firm refusal and stop making concessions to him.”
“I would also recommend adding something new to your life that will give you joy and nourish you with energy. Fatigue is bad, because now it is important for you to gain strength. Allow yourself to relax and have fun, even if you can only set aside a couple of hours a week. Bright colors will help to recover and establish a personal life, said the specialist.
If a divorce has already happened and the woman has not regretted this decision in a year and a half, then it means that it was right. Therefore, it remains only to get out of the networks of the past and move forward more decisively. The main thing is to clearly define personal boundaries and allow new worthy people into life.
