How to explain to your son that the father exchanged him for a child in a new marriage

Every woman who gets married wants to believe that love, understanding and harmony will always reign in her family. However, such expectations are not always in touch with reality. Editorial "Site" We will share the story of our reader. The woman in the position had to part with her beloved. Soon her ex-husband after the divorce went headlong into a new marriage, forgetting about his son. Below you will find all the details of this familiar situation, as well as a comment from a psychologist about the situation.



A month after the divorce, I found out I was expecting a baby. The relationship with her ex-husband was not restored. Nevertheless, he helped financially and always said that his son was important to him. Not long ago he married for the second time. The new wife gave birth to a child, after which my ex-husband said that now there will be no help from him and he is not going to communicate with his son either.

He held onto his son for fear that he would not have more children. But now he has a beloved woman and a desired child. At this stage, the question arose: how can I explain to my son where his father disappeared? ?



This and similar stories always cause sadness and a lot of sympathy for the mother and child. But the truth is, the boy will have to find out the truth. It is very important to find the right words. The child should understand what is happening, but in no case should he be injured. Of course, at this point, the mother herself needs to fully experience this news.

At a minimum, talk to family and friends, get support and accept the existing circumstances. It is best to get quality help from a psychologist, because it is extremely difficult to cope with such difficulties on your own. And that's perfectly normal. Only after the pain and bitterness subsides, you can prepare for a conversation with the child.



In the process of living such a life test, it is very important respond a few questions. Did you and your husband initially have differences in feelings and values? How unexpected was his action to you? Perhaps there were any “alarm bells”? When you were in a relationship, was this person attentive to you or was his interests and desires always paramount to him?

To find the answers to these and other difficult questions, you may need a lot of time. And slow down me.



You also need to understand that your ex-husband loved your son. But definitely not as a person. Rather as the embodiment of himself, his heir. And now it is logical to assume that the creation of a new family, the appearance of a second child became the realization of his dream of a full-fledged family.

Having started life from scratch, he simply cannot find the strength to be in the past and in the present at the same time. You can thank him for what happened when you were healthy and not in poverty. Otherwise, recovering from stress would be much more difficult.



After all, your son has a father anyway and always will. Yes, the father is peculiar, who made his choice and will inevitably bear responsibility for it. But it is, and that is the main thing. You need to understand this yourself and convey this idea to the baby. This will give him the opportunity not to feel like some kind of “wrong”, inferior and abandoned. At the same time, you should still consult a child psychologist in order to mitigate all possible consequences for the child.



What do you think of this story? Boldly share your thoughts in the comments. We wish that you and your family always live peacefully, happily and with joy, despite any life trials!