Stories about dads

This post contains the most ridiculous stories about,
as the children were left with their fathers well and accordingly all the consequences thereof.
Many of them recognize themselves told, well, someone will think and say, "No! I'll be a good father! »






neighbor sovdepovaya aunt told me:
I had to jelly to go and food some what to buy, and Nastya, 2 months old, had come to check the doctor on duty ... as time went for dinner, and the doctor was late, well, I decided to husband to leave with a child, and she ran for Dad ... we have been timid, always afraid to take the baby in her arms - and then smash her something ...
I came the doctor, unwrapped, looked drawn and said goodbye ... Vitaminka left the apartment, her husband accompanied her to the elevator ...
when the elevator down from the 8th floor to 1st in the doctor opened the door she saw much of our dad breathless:
 - And now taken up and wrap it was!




A story from my mother - like two years left me for a whole day at my father and a friend of her husband, while her mother and a friend were skiing. We were given zu - feed porridge, walk, feed the egg come ... the evening - a child, in principle, in order, even starve to death, but the entire kitchen littered with dirty dishes, layers. Plate filled with burnt milk, dishes, plates, bowls, pots, pans, kastryulischi ... Mom looks at it, takes the plate with the most enormous, six-liter pot, "But there something in it that you do ???" Dad " Egg cooked ... »




The story about my dad (suitable if the statute of limitations?), Which was left on the farm with a simple instruction: to feed the children. Dad found something in the refrigerator taken them for mushroom soup, warmed it and offered the children (me and my brother, 5 and 3 years approximately). Children in unison said, "Fu-oo-oo" after the first bite and then Dad brought a killer argument. "How so?" - He asked. - "Mama tried, cooked, and you do not eat? Do you want to hurt her ???? "Children ashamed and repent," soup "was safely eaten, dad is happy, my mother - in shock. Why shocked? Because children at dinner was harvested some other food, and my dad fed us soup from the workpiece for dried mushrooms - whether cooked base salt, or simply crumbled mushrooms.

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Young mother left the child for a few hours, the education of his father, again young and inexperienced, very young children, a year.
On return, finds the picture:
A child sitting on his chair and screaming.
The child extends dad's hand and puts the child in the mouth spoon.
Child-smacking relish, spits out a spoon, yelling.
Again, hand, spoon, smack, Op.
My mother comes into the kitchen, in front of a child sitting pope, with a half-empty jar of honey.
When asked what it all means, the Pope said that the child nostalgia for mom and yelling without a break and the only way to shut him up, it was a spoonful of honey.
So he fed the baby a lot. My mother was very worried, then what is an allergy.
The Pope was very worried that it once again will be left with the child, the child is worried that ended honey.
Allergies were not, but honey I've had since I do not like!




aunt daughter left her husband. while my father slept, the three-year girl cut off his braid and glue one on his forehead superglue

***

Mom in the hospital, the daughter of five and a half, my father on the farm. Braided tresses. For the first time, for science. Wrong place bandaging tape. Specifically, since in several layers.
Result stuck parallel to the floor. Three days were held - could not untwist ...

***

Well this was. Left once the child (he was three years) and dad just two hours. I come: Dad had a good sleep on the couch, snoring already, put his hands on the doll from a puppet theater (fox and rabbit), the child hid him his Blankets next chair put on it - a cup of juice, and more ryadom- pot.
The door closed, he sits on the floor in the hallway, I go, "Shhh! Dad is sleeping! »

***

Many years ago, I left a daughter caring daddy. It has been 3 years, managed without diapers, but a nuisance Mogdy still happen. Before leaving, I showed Dad, where are the spare Dochkin truselya. Dad said something in the spirit of "Do not teach an eagle to fly eggs or chicken is not taught." Having given the CO, I flew off. Returning 3 hours later, the daughter found a roaring in my lacy shorts. "They are so small, I thought it was her»)))




Leaves for a week, all the Pope wrote, spoke, for my daughter in the garden to prepare a set of clothes. On Wednesday, they had a celebration of autumn. Prepared dress to stick sticker: Wednesday celebration of autumn, to bring your dress and the camera (if the holiday without parents, I usually ask governess to take pictures). I come and what do I see in the photographs? God, I would not even awake for a child is not dressed.
The young lady in my pajama (!) T-shirt (green striped) in orange skirt, white stockings with snowflakes. Oh my God! I asked the pope why not put on a dress. The Pope said that the girl insisted on holiday to wear pajamas, and my dad found a compromise - just put on a t-shirt pajamas) So in fact, Daddy had done and I am glad - to hell with it, pajama vest - the good that my daughter skirt on holiday it all- still clothed, and that it had in his pajamas went on holiday for sure.

***

When I was five years old, my mother was hospitalized for two weeks. My mother left me with my father, after having prepared clean ironed dresses every day and by issuing detailed instructions to his father. Dad all the teachings, of course, I forgot. But still I tried very hard, so every day washed and ironed clothes, in which he gave me. So I went to kindergarten in the same two weeks.



I was 4 years old, his brother - 11. The school announced quarantine, brother did not go to school. My mother was a rush job, so that the economy had to leave Dad.
Like any Soviet mum, our ready meals in advance - this was not a problem :) The problems started when we wanted to play with my brother and dad watched football. We were given Rubik's Cube - unthinkable at the time and is very expensive thing, brought our wilderness from abroad. And as much as 2 pieces! Well, my brother and I quickly found a use for them, while my father distracted by television, first stripped all the stickers with cubes, and then I ate half of labels. The second half of a noble brother left, but for some reason he was not tempted to them :)
Mom, come home from work, I was in shock, I sated hiccup stickers, trying finished chewing the second half, the cubes "naked", the brother went to the full nesoznanku "did not see, did not participate," Dad throws up his hands :)



My opponent's dad as a child from the kindergarten took. Brought home - was told to go back

***

Before you go to lay baby (11 months), I ask my husband to do with my daughter (5, 5 years) charge. Typically, for the sport in the family I say, and we will always do all the exercises together - that no one was hurt, but then I have neither the strength nor the time - ask assistance of the hall (the husband). Later, after putting the baby, I find her husband, reclining on a couch, very tired in appearance. On his lap flaunt pours fresh bruises. I somehow maliciously notice about good corporate eve, and my husband says angrily: "Look! What is this charge from our daughter ?! The horror of that instead of charging! Exercise some countries - especially the wolf and the fox. " I'm starting to giggle nervously and said: "You are probably surprised, but not in such a complex exercise." The husband says, "As there ?! And it was: Get on all fours, walk along the orthopedic pad, wave its tail (exercise fox), and povoyte the moon (exercise the wolf). " I imagine vividly how her husband is howling at the moon and waves nonexistent tail, and even standing on orthopedic pupyrchatoy mat ... In the morning I asked my daughter what they did for charging. And she says: "You know, Mom, it was so boring to do the normal charge and I came up with a new ...»



Asked - to play with the baby, I quietly soup to cook, the kitchen is closed. After a while, I hear - "The first First, I second. Changing of the guard! "And so indefinitely, alternating with embossed steps. Later aching voice: "Paa-up, I ustaaaal, mozhnoo I posizhuuu." Peeps - my husband is sleeping safely on the couch, Valentin (3 years) in full uniform (raincoat, helmet, gun, sword) marching from one end of the sofa to another, the report himself. I ask - what are you doing? Responsible - Dad and I play in the SOFA KING!

***

not about her husband, and about my dad can?)
Mom was in the night, left my clothes in the garden - dress, socks, handkerchief. Pope diligently all dressed, buttoned up in front of all buttons of dress. then looks, and nowhere to put a handkerchief. Well, I think just left, it means it somewhere you need to attach! I began to turn, and a pocket on the back turned. Dad just put the dress on my ass in front of) like a handkerchief saved from embarrassment)

***

I work in a kindergarten. In the morning dad leads his daughter (the girl of 5 years). Everything is wonderful. It comes to the "quiet time", the girl refused to change into my pajamas. After some questioning, one-on-one about the reason, it appears that the pope, gathering the child in kindergarten, not wearing underwear at her daughter. The problem is solved with a "duty of cowards." In the evening talking with my dad, it turns out that my mother had left a clear written instructions on what and how to dress the baby, but that's about to write briefs forgotten. (Apparently, she thought that it was a matter of course ... naive ...)



Do not let the story from my mother, but by a direct participant in the events

because we've got a very, very tragicomic - which, as I understand it, it takes on the format :)

In general, our incomparable (in the sense of Lesko's daughter) was then five and a half months. It was one of the first cases where the child's mother entrusted me shiftless father-sad sack "a long time" - that is, for three hours or four. And most of the time Incomparable should sleep on the balcony in the cradle of the carriage, so that the mission I had a simple and, in general, is feasible - to monitor from time to time, to the heiress not raskoposhilas the wind (was April, cool), and if you woke up then do not try to practice crawl right in the cradle. Well, of course, then change diapers / feed / play. The worst thing for the Pope-sideltsa with the child - to know that in theory all you need to do, but not to be confident in their abilities in practice. In the end, I ran to the child every 7-8 minutes and dovybegalsya to the fact that the balcony door slammed a draft (a wise and experienced wife always! In such cases, tied a rope to the handle of the balcony, but where much to his father a guess). 8 floor. April. Unparalleled in the blanket and dad trusselyah and T-shirt. After that, everything was like a bad comedy: and yelling from the balcony "People! Call my wife, I'll tell you the phone! ", And distance learning cat opening the balcony door, and attempted to climb out the window. Saviour became a neighbor who for the next chilled my cry went out and borrowed a phone. My mother came from a certain meeting in the prosecutor's office (she is a journalist by profession) for 20 minutes, the child safely awakened just in time for the time, was delighted, and my dad was blue and very, very scared :)



Daughter Pauline suffers chronic tonsillitis and lost hope for the treatment of classical methods tried homeopathy. The drug is round beads - beads. From work to give an indication of a drink after dinner, 10 balls out of the box, which is on the table. In the evening Paulina complains that it is hard to get, and unpleasant to chew, very large. As a result of the investigation it was found out that Dad feed the baby ... 10 balls from meteorites Guerlain ... I just did not occur to clarify the parameters of color boxes and balls. There were no effects :)

***

7 March 1988 (the end of the Soviet regime, empty shops, do not get it) sent her husband to the store for eggs by giving him money for a dozen eggs, and 2-year-old child for strolling. Baby for a walk with my husband did not like yelling, how to cut a pig. But the store they have produced such a sensation that they packed 62 eggs. No one knew how it happened.

***

youngest son, Timothy, was about a year. I stayed with my dad for the day. evening my husband called me
 - It is terribly moody. the whole day he is walking behind me and roars.
 - Sasha, and you feed him than for lunch?
 - ....????.. about! it also had to feed! ..

***

I tell a friend about her husband. Before you embark on the first night to the child, he trained at the plush Winnie wear diapers. When the child began to cry at night, Dad got up and did the trick. An hour later, my mother had to wake up. Dad slept. The child was crying. Next to the baby lying in disguise Winnie. Moreover, the diaper was on it backwards.



Son was 2 months old, stayed with my dad. I come, and they are both mysterious. It turns out that Dad could not find diapers (!!!!) showed ingenuity and adjusted the sliders to the sanitary napkin (it quickly found a reason). Son even officially became quiet and stopped crying.
Son 6 years. In the country went for a walk with my dad. Son (cycling) is back after 15 minutes. Dad waited for 2 hours, returned almost gray. It turns out the son of the Pope lost sight and decided to return home until late.

***

A couple of years ago left its subsidiaries for the whole day was about 2 muzha.Mladshey let.Vozvraschayus -muzh home sleeping in the hall on divane.Mladshaya wanders around with a spoon in his hand, standing next to a chair, in the chair very evenly smeared soup, the daughter dressed shorts backwards, shoot shorts, as well as diapers and also backwards napered.Tut husband opens his eyes and says happily -nakormil, watered, dressed -Actually everything under control :)

***

The friend told me that her daughter had left with my dad, and it began to him to play with dolls and drink some water from his cup doll. Dad was very happy as long as my mother did not come back and did not ask whether he does not know that the only water, which can reach up to year-old girl - from the toilet?

***

I was three months old, my mother ran away on business, and my father confused dill vodichku with rubbing alcohol, and watered for me. Clearly, I spit, but my father was terribly frightened. They put me in the hospital, it was a new exemplary Bolnichka Akademgorodok there hung a sign near cots. On my reading "Yulia Ivanova. Age - 3 months. Diagnosis: alcohol poisoning. " All trainees sprinkle with laughter, and my ma who was lying with me was very ashamed. Since then, I do not drink liquor.



For a long time it was, I was very little. The real story of our neighbor. Dad, two sons of the student, the daughter - Sadowski age. Where the wife was away - I have no idea, somewhere for a week. It happened on the first day - after the Pope was extremely attentive and collected)) Generally morning. Seniors are more or less independent, dress - go to school. He was the younger stroked evening dress with his wife, washed himself, raschsal - tied tail !!! out - come to a halt (kindergarten two stops from the house). stop ten minutes walk. And that's when Dad had looked into the distance waiting for the bus, you hear a timid voice of a child: dad, and I would not blame the teacher? And for that, Olenka, you criticize - we are not going to be late ... And even more because I have no SANDALIKOV!

***

There was a situation with me) my mother worked at home, but sometimes she had to go to the office, take orders) in such situations, I left the pope)
Then one in Sa mom put me to eat buckwheat porridge with milk, wafers Artek handed to raise appetite, the pope gave the CO monitor the child and left. Dad was sooo busy watching football, accordingly the child was left to myself.
When my mother came back - found "oil painting" - Pope actively ill front of the TV in the room, and I sleep in a pug-dog dish with wafers in the teeth)))



from its own pre-school age or mladsheshkolnogo:
Mom sped away for 2-3 days on a business trip, the Pope left the money to feed them both. Pope on the first day happily bought some fashionable drill with a hammer. The remaining days we ate pumpkin with sugar and baked in the oven.

***
Mom, going to night classes, says Pope programmer (it is perhaps important):
 - Sasha feed and put the kids to bed.
Dad Sasha fed and told the children to go to sleep. Younger Alice:
 - Dad, I want to eat.
 - What about you such instructions have been received!

***

The case of my husband's childhood. He is 5 years old, younger brother Sasha - 8 months., Mom was not at home, my father on the farm. It took the Pope to absent himself for a short while, well, so younger will not climbed, he tied his waist belt so he could crawl in a restricted zone, a senior Cole instructed to watch his brother both, and he left. A horror as Kohl became interesting, as it is to sit on a leash. Well, he untied his brother and himself tied his belt ... on the node. Those who came after 15 minutes appeared picture of the Pope: Senior tied tightly, tears and snot, roaring good mate, a junior selflessly rake the ashes from the stove. via katechkina.livejournal.com

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