How to stop being Mother Teresa in a relationship with your mother-in-law

Relationships between relatives They don't always go well. And usually the "records" in the number of conflicts with each other are exactly the daughter-in-law and mother-in-law. These women always have something to argue about and stop talking about. Although almost any such conflict grows out of a fictional problem.

Knowing this, many young women, even before marriage, build their own model of behavior in order to maintain normal relationships. One of these models seemed quite interesting. Therefore, we are in a hurry to share the rules that one of our subscribers has developed for themselves.



Before the wedding, I had to listen to the instructions of my father and grandmother. So when I got married, I was determined to like my mother-in-law and my father-in-law, no matter what. For about a year I lived with them in the soul, but every month and week it became unbearable for me.



“As I was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, I thought convulsively about what the future might hold for me. I knew I couldn't go on like this forever, so it would end in divorce. We had to change our relationship immediately. And change yourself.

I ceased to be “Mother Teresa” and diligently brushed aside concerns about what others would think. The 10 rules of conduct I developed with my father-in-law were the salvation I needed so much.”

The first thing I did was stop being silent when I was “run over.” Does my mother-in-law at the table accidentally slap something stupid in my direction? Now I don’t keep quiet or convince myself that I just heard it. I answer. Sometimes it's pretty tough. Protecting yourself is helpful and enjoyable.

Stop talking to my father-in-law about small things. At the meeting, greeted, exchanged a few phrases and dispersed. Nor do I listen to their complaints about each other and about life in general. Being a pillow for tears is a pleasure. If you listen, the second, and the third, you will also be guilty of something.”



Don’t let me command you, I don’t let you command me or my family. When I hear sarcastic remarks about my relatives, I immediately stand up for them. Dad and grandma are sacred, and I don’t want to live with the feeling that I betrayed my own.

My husband is supposed to support me, his wife, and not other relatives. If he has married me and is building a family with me, let him be kind and supportive. It's not easy for me to fight off everyone alone.



If my relatives are in my family, I won’t be silent anymore. I don’t smile silently when I say, “We’re not in your family, but....” If “white” is publicly called “black”, then we should talk about it.

I stopped taking help from my mother-in-law. They will help me once, secondly, and then in any argument they will hint and count how much they helped me, and I am so ungrateful. It is better to cope with yourself than to feel constantly that I owe them something.”

Don’t say “Yes, there was a point that you don’t have to talk about everything.” But the ban on spiritual conversations with my mother-in-law I made for myself separately. She will gladly discuss your problems, fears and experiences with her friends. As a result, the minds of at least three pensioners will work against you, a young girl.



I stopped answering my mother-in-law's intrusive phone calls. Why talk when you know that a useless conversation will last for a good half an hour? When I do not want to start a conversation and spoil my mood, I do not answer the phone.

And the last thing I learned well for myself is that it is worth living away from mother-in-law. It seems banal, but greatly saves nerves. And in the relationship with her husband there are fewer problems, – concluded Alla.



The young woman came up with some pretty radical rules. It seems that the relationship between relatives did not work out at all if Alla does not want to keep in touch with them. What do you think of the girl's beliefs? Which ones seem healthy to you and which ones seem unacceptable?