Yesterday my husband left her... 6 truths about marriage that I would like to know 10 years ago. Bashny.Net

Love... there is Hardly even such a phenomenon in life that began with such high hopes and expectations and which would invariably have failed, ending in bitter disappointment.

Peaceful family life, happy and peaceful — the dream of many women. There are men who also crave it. Why do so many children grow up in incomplete families, and people recently who loved each other breaking up?

I think we know too little about yourself, and even less about other people. We were not taught at school what love is, they did not explain what are the pitfalls is fraught with marriage. Very sorry! All of this should have thought even 10 years ago.




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A happy family life

1. No one is obliged to love just
   It's true. The person with whom you start a family, is not your baby that you love unconditionally. All people change, their feelings, and absolute, immutable love does not exist! You can't just continuously love the person as he is you. To keep love, you need to work hard. Sometimes even need to help another person get to know you better and to love.
   
   
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2. The most difficult in marriage 2 years after birth
   This period determines how your family will live on. Need to train patience, to talk with each other as often as possible, to overcome anger and resentment. If you do not learn how to do this while the baby is small, further family life will turn into hell. Don't be embarrassed to ask for help when you need it, you need to be able to make it. Constantly remind yourself why you are with this person, why the choice fell on him. If a young family is difficult to cope with all the chores, you can hire helpers in the end! Life does not have to destroy love.
   
   
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3. Sex is not always on the first place
   When the relationship lasts long enough, sex is gradually disappearing into the background. It is not necessary to feel guilty for wanting sex less or, conversely, more than a partner. But the chill in relations is a common problem! If you are not excited by your partner, just like old times, try to understand yourself. Go to a shrink, arrange a photo shoot with her husband, find things that excite you, look erotic film... don't know what turns you on, but do it.
   
   If you are the partner that always wants more, it is not necessary to become a blackguard. Add warmth to the relationship to a loved person wanting to be close! Joint activities, fun, travel, walking is what you need.
   
   
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4. Pleasant things daily!
   "I never will reach good results, if not going to do your job with discipline; if I'm doing something, only when I'm "in the mood", it can be a nice or amusing hobby, but I'll never be a master in this art..." But love is an art, so says Erich Fromm, quote of which I quote. What pleasant things? In addition to his duties at home, there are many things that can be done for the pleasure of the partner. The simplest is to say something nice. Once again to hug, to show their feelings. That's so ironic! Sometimes it seems that feelings have not at all, no love, just so tired... But as soon as you do something for the other, caress their soul mate, the feelings re-appear!
   
   Why not buy avocados the wife, if she loves it so? Why not cook for her husband's favorite dish that is usually on the table only on holidays? Why not make a massage to your loved one? How sad that because of the banal laziness ruined families...
   
   
5. Never get down those who are not willing to try to keep the family together
   If one slows down, the second will not be able to help him. Alone will not build a happy marriage, alas! This requires a mutual desire. It will take several years and will be very sad to look back and realize you did not pull your part. Family life — his personal choice. Mature personality, all make the conscience, working on yourself and the relationship. If you do not want to work, it is better to leave and give the partner the opportunity to find someone who will wish with all my heart for the sake of joint happiness.
   
   
6. Don't forget to say thanks
   We often neglect appreciation in relationships and don't appreciate what makes the other person. Don't even notice! Gratitude can strengthen family and make everyone significantly happier. We know only that it was in the past. About the future we only know that somewhere out there looms death. Here's the clarity from which to proceed. If you remember that you are not eternal, not eternal close friends, and the family are quite different...
   
   
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"If love were only a feeling, there would be no reason to promise to love each other forever. The feeling comes and goes!" What do you think about this? Tell us in the comments!

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Alexander Klimchuk Since childhood, interested in medicine, grew up in a family of doctors. Knows how to make a fancy Breakfast out of nothing, is not afraid to experiment in the kitchen, making pies without flour, low-fat mayonnaise, healthy sweets. Never give up and believes that people are created to help each other! In all its domestic Affairs the assistant to the son Sasha. Alexandra's favorite book — "the Art of loving" by E. Fromm.