His game is a traitor begins with the role of Siren siren, it does not matter to which sex he belongs to. It all starts with the praise of the victim and even her reverence.
Here is the story of one of my patients, a teacher of mathematics of one of Rostov higher education institutions, 40 years, innovative ideas which at the moment of meeting with a Mellifluous siren all colleagues rejected.
"Here, all my thoughts were accompanied by the enthusiastic adoption, jokes were evaluated leaping, hearty laugh, and actions admired. In her presence the first time I felt smart, beautiful, successful and worldly man. Especially as my wife constantly "educated", work criticized, and she was younger than me for almost twelve years old, handsome, and most importantly — correctly assessed all of my ideas!"
Type the sirens described in Homer's poem "Odyssey". By the way, he also pointed out the treatment and
...The inevitable Chara
They are suitable to catch him near people seaworthy.
Who, out of ignorance, to those two witches when close to the figure, they are sweet
Voice heard, that no wife, no young children
In his house, not to comfort a welcome return:
Sweet singing his charms, on the bright
Sitting in the meadow; the meadow is white human
A lot of bones, and scattered glowing skin there rags.
But all Odysseus wanted to hear their singing. Then the witch CIRCE gave him instructions:
Well you taped comrades ears a hint of honey
Wax, so to hear they could not, proplyne without regard
By; but if he fateful wish to hear
Voice, were to get you hands and feet tied
To the mast of your ship with a rope; then you
Can your hearing without harm to UDOVOLSTVIE disastrous singing.
If W ask you start or order will be, so removed
Your bonds, then you may immediately double bind.
(And here's the method of treatment! Just try to use it with our odiseame.)
Now listen to what the sirens sang to Odysseus. It's been a few thousand years, and the modern "sirens" are singing the same thing. The words may be different but the meaning is one-to-one:
"To us, a divine Odysseus, great glory of Agean,
Us ship come; ladainian sirens Nasledie,
Here no one runs with his ship Navy,
Centepede singing on our meadow not listening;
Who heard us, he returned to the house, much svedav.
We all know what happened in the Trojan land, what
Fate by the will of the immortal suffered a Trojan and achean;
We all know that the bosom of the earth mnogomernoi going on".
So we they kadapuram captivating name.
I want to draw your attention that they promised no love, no sex, they lured Ulysses to find out about what happened to his family and what is happening on the ground. And what most interested him at that moment.
And the Odyssey was attracted not love:
Drawn by ...
Heart to listen, comrades, I filed a sign to immediately
My bonds permitted, and they also vengeance
Started greste, but to me ptosed, Primed with Evrikom
New stronger ties my hands and feet were tied.
Well done! Execute the order. Nothing happened, but in real life do not count the victims of the Mellifluous sirens. And the good of privjazyvali no special. One Odysseus so much to Kamchatka left. Two years (!) lived there, but my head continued to sound his voice Mellifluous sirens. Eventually the moment came when he dropped everything and rushed to her. Then for a long time we have treated!
Yes, and the Odyssey in Ancient Greece was the ideal of the mind, intelligence and wisdom, because he knew how dangerous the Mellifluous voice of the sirens, but when I heard them singing, that did not help him his mind demanded that he be untied and changed the ship's course. Much later, Rochefoucauld astutely observed: "the Mind is always a fool at heart."
But Homer told us about the external manifestations odiseevich suffering. I know what is not told to us by Homer, about Odysseus than just shy to talk about his inner feelings (our mathematics, it is not about sex sang — he was there all right. She praised his scientific development, and recognition of colleagues he was most needed). But we continue on the "mellifluous sirens" that are found in many industries. The descriptions of Homer, is a bird with pretty feminine heads.
Those sirens who ruined my players, too, were pretty, I would even say attractive, sometimes very beautiful, and that is definitely sexy looking women with a live moving temperament sanguine plan and features easy hysteria. The body of the while they were, of course, women, but not for their victims. Victims faced only with steel "psychic claws" which could not, or rather not even wanted and tried to escape.
Moreover, they sucked out all the juice, "sirens" drove them away. They left, accumulated material and psychological forces and means in another place, but then again, inexorably drawn to their muchitelnitsa. Those who saw the prey, it quickly took up again, and chased the unfortunate.
After several such turns the victim asked for help, rather, as a rule, brought them to his wife, "Cinderella" at its core. They're not even really offended by their husbands, often of the "Eternal princes". Sami siren for help appealed to me very rarely. Their psychological portrait and destiny made me the stories of Odissei safely, although with great difficulty and loss, were able to escape from their psychological clawed paws, when the singing ceased to charm them. Listen to the story of one of my players.
One episode in his relationship with the Sweet siren I described in the book "Psychological Aikido". I will not repeat it. Now I will recreate the whole picture. Moreover, he introduced me with his Mellifluous siren, is a rare case when I beheld the partner of his ward, because usually learn about them only from the stories of the victims.But first a small introduction.
My ward, the Eternal Prince, working with me, began to break out in kings. When I met him, it was a handsome blond man of 25 years with the appearance of social character, but with a constant sadness in his eyes. It was a very long time. We became good friends. Something in common was our destiny. Us enforcement was called to the personnel Department in the army. In a military town we met and five years was friendly.
He was very unhappy with their lot, believed that conscription had crippled his life, snatched from a scientific career. He lived as if. I didn't understand what he wanted. In the service he moved, however, for the purposes of administration, the financial situation was good, success with women enjoyed, but I especially nobody was interested. He married a wonderful woman in it doted, and, as they say, surrounded the entire concern.
5 years later fate threw us in different directions. We met him again in Rostov. I by this time was working as a lecturer in the Department of psychiatry, and he was a lecturer at the Rostov higher military school with the rank of Colonel, he already had two wonderful children: a boy and a girl.
Cinderella still in it doted, he is graciously allowed to love themselves and care for themselves. However, family life and his wife he was great had no complaints, her sexy side was even happy, the more that were sexual athletes. Was he before he married other women, but they were not in this respect any comparison with his wife.
After the wedding, he habitually made some connections, but nothing he is not allowed. Just each time he was convinced that his wife is better. So by the time of our meeting he has 12 years was a faithful husband, and this faithfulness was worth nothing because he had no desire to go on the side.
He looks almost unchanged, except it seemed a little older. But the biggest stretch for more than 35 years he could not give, though he was already 42. Remained unchanged and the sadness in his eyes. The fact is that with science and then he had bad luck. Being a good specialist and a scientist, he could not defend the thesis, although written two of them. In one case, the topic ceased to be relevant in the other — found errors in the methodology.
In that condition he was when we met by chance. I by this time became interested in modern methods of psychotherapy, and encouraged him to study with me. Three years he systematically went to school. He managed to find a very original idea, and most importantly, to develop it.
He even received some notoriety in academic circles, but the attitude of colleagues has been mixed. Since the topic had a great novelty, that there were serious objections. But he changed — I was ready to defend the idea, the sadness in his eyes disappeared, it was already a King, however, still uncrowned. At least, I thought so.
His life is spun, four years we were together. I put in my card index of his history as the auspicious event of healing. When we met, it was a 60-year-old man, although he was not yet 50 years old. He bitterly noted that the tram compassionate woman give it to him.
(By the way, by the time of our second meeting, in addition to depressive neurosis he had a "bouquet" of psychosomatic diseases: hypertension, anatsidnyh gastritis, bronchitis with barking cough, which prevented him to attend the meetings, and something else.)
That's right, you guessed it: he met his Sweet siren. She had the same specialty but working in another Department. At work they often met, sometimes they were in some companies. He noted her good looks, sociability, playfulness, even talent in the business, but close contact does not occur, one might even say, had not occurred. Moreover, he introduced her to his friend, to whom Sweet siren very much. The fate of this acquaintance, he didn't even know, so it then is not interested.And now his story:
"The work I have went. With the help of methods of psychological influence I was able to eliminate the defects of the education of my children, I realized who all these years was my wife. I even explained to her for the first time in love in his youth has somehow managed without it. My cause grew. I became a group leader and began to dial his assistant. I didn't immediately take them to the staff, offered first get acquainted with the essence of the matter.
The idea was so new that full recognition has not yet received. And I myself am not quite aware of their value, sometimes I was tormented by doubts about whether what I'm doing. So I have been looking for volunteer assistants. The group is slowly amassing, were the disciples. I began to go to the conference and would become a specific, but an ambiguous fame in the scientific world.
At this point the Mellifluous siren and turned to me with a request to implement my methods in her work. I agreed. When you receive a new job, I do it all by myself. She helped me, and I was amazed at how quickly she had mastered, and thought that I would have a good helper. I wanted to transfer our business together in her hands and stand back, just continuing to lead.
But she suddenly disappeared from my horizon. Then I remembered her provocations to the sexual rapprochement. We returned quite late from work together. She was invited to go to her house. Only very sorry that I will not be able to meet my husband as he is traveling. It was something else, but I somehow is not touched. I reveled in its successes in production and happiness. A year has passed. We occasionally met. The technique began to spread, and I began to ask to select personnel and introduce this methodology in their companies.
My students were added. I was pushing and then I remembered about her. Recommended it in one of the prestigious institution. She agreed and began to learn from me.
Whether I do this time became the class expert, whether it was just the Siren the siren, but I was amazed at the speed of development on new developments, the full understanding and acceptance of all of my ideas, which required significant break-up in Outlook and in lifestyle. After some time, in the days when she was absent, I realized that I miss her that in her presence I feel a burst of energy, increases productivity, and it all turns her admiring look and sweet words.
It recognizes me as a genius, everything I say, perceived with delight. She was leaping laughing at my jokes, so I felt a great comedian, though he never distinguished by wit. I began to realize that she likes me and as a man, but did not realize that I like her as a woman. To me it was just nice.
We often appeared together at conferences, meetings, banquets. I didn't lurk because anything sexual to her until felt. But what man of Mature age, not like when he looks with admiration of the beautiful, temperamental woman younger than him for 12-15 years and focus not says of young beauties.
You ask, and what kind of relationship I had with my wife? You can answer. In principle, good. (Here it is where the crack, which will turn into the abyss. Any word that is added to the word "good" indicates an approaching storm. The norm is when family relationships are excellent, and the husband and wife are still passionate about each other and as sexual partners. — M. L.).
The fact that the wife did not accept my new philosophy that I've learned about you, and not involved in my new life initiator of many events. She was actually my mother, and I grew up in care is not needed. I needed a friend who would have accompanied me everywhere and always. And she refused to travel with me to conferences, to attend my lectures and even at banquets and presentations organized in my honor.
We had only good sex and children. From-for employment I began to depart from the household and wanted my wife less doing it. We have material resources, but she did everything herself, and the increased rent and the economy demanded more and more time.
She started to get tired and to avoid sexual relationships, the sex became less frequent. We clashed on different small occasions. (That's how sex was implemented. — M. L.). I felt like a married bachelor. Always in pairs, and I am one. Nevertheless, I, at least at the level of my consciousness, everything was more concerned about conflicts with his wife, although I spent more time with his Mellifluous siren.
So far was my conscious thought from the intimate connection with her that I introduced her to your house, open to the public and my friends, including female. I didn't even notice my wife's reaction to her appearance. The small house scandals became more frequent. Business communication with "siren" became more and more intense.
Don't remember who started it, but we admitted that we like each other, just remember that she first told me that she loves me, told me how he lived his life. That it is one of the three children's mother was forced to give to the orphanage, where she has had to endure a brutal struggle for existence.
There were many touching stories about how she was not lucky with men. When she was 18 years old she was seduced by one guy, she got pregnant, but in the end, he agreed to marry her. Then she left directly from the wedding and had an abortion, hating all men.
Went to College, all the attention was paid to the school, went on the red diploma. Last year she proposed to her current husband. She told him about her life. He was very surprised and a little stunned, because I was brought up in the normative for the time of morality, according to which before the wedding should not be sex life.
Nevertheless they married, but love and sexual attraction to him, she did not feel. She had Hobbies. It turned out that our work together she also got dumped for another hobby. Now the object of that infatuation, loving me, she broke up. In the family, strained relationship with mother-in-law, her husband all the time, brings up, etc.
As it turned out, all this was not so. Already during her studies, she was a Mellifluous siren, led an intense sexual life, frequently changing sexual partners, older than her age and financially secure, and sometimes their "dinamina". Moreover, her life was an episode. She was going to marry her classmate. Built play hard to get, and she was leading an intense sexual life. (I've seen her. Indeed, in view of the angel. — M. L.).
One episode I will tell you. I have heard from the victim of my character. By the way, I met him at your seminars, my dear Mikhail Yefimovich, so that the truth of his words is no doubt. The more he told me his story, not knowing that I had something to do with this woman. Just told as a case of his suffering life. And after our breakup, she showed the same behavior. But this was after.
So he was going to marry her. Preparations were made for the wedding. He agreed to meet around a house. Out came a little earlier. It was drizzling, and he entered the porch of a nearby house, stood under the stairwell and smoked.
Suddenly he heard a shrill laughter of his Mellifluous siren that discusses with a man, as they say now, "Caucasian nationality", the details that you just performed sexual activities. The wedding was upset, but he still got married about the same, only lower educational level.
But back to your story.
I felt sorry for her. In spiritual terms, it got me very much. I told her about the practice of psychology. Now it was necessary to arrange a sexual encounter. I wanted to give her good sex, and maybe yourself to demonstrate. From it in this respect I was not expecting anything good. Thought here, I will be a teacher. I didn't know that she's more experienced than me.
Already at the organizational presexual stage of my torment. Twenty years of fidelity did the trick. It turned out that he had lost all the skills of a secret courtship, I had no organizational experience, I don't want him to go. In General, all this lasted quite a long time.
When I managed to reconcile, she refused, citing moral and ethical standards. I was a bit annoyed, but no more. Said that we will do business and about sex forget. Everything went back to normal. She sang to me the praises, I listened to them. She was remorseful and promised that it will no longer behave like that. I was adamant, but not very, though and refused to organize.
At this time I was invited to a scientific conference. She also managed to have her sent there. And here my sexual fantasies played out. I want to remind that all this happened on the background of my conflict with my wife. Sex took place there, but I'm open, show their best qualities I had failed. But, as I thought everyone understood. Psychological relations has not changed, and, perhaps, deepened. We began to think about how to begin to live together.
But then I started the service complications. There were many ideas, but the thesis did not fit. Did not succeed to make. Anyway, I was busy with him and did not notice that she lost interest in me. However, I did not look in the best way.
By this time and age began to play its role. I was facing imminent dismissal from the army, if not protected. When I asked her advice about the thesis, she told me that it is necessary to conduct a number of studies. I understood that it is desirable to do, but the time propped up, and power was on the wane. Then I was helped, but she did not, and others. She said we should stop the meeting.
It was for me blow. If I were smartserver and turned, I probably would not look so old now. That's when I realized what anguish experienced Odyssey. But if Homer could not describe them, then I certainly will not succeed. I will say as I can. All the light faded. Not that I was begging, but for my mind it was noticeable how hard it is for me.
Unfortunately, it still spun in front of me and demonstrated their new Hobbies. May not be demonstrated, but simply could not hide. I tried not to meet her, but everything was filled by her, insult her, unfortunately that all went wrong. I lived only those moments when she actually was nice to me. I have not asked her love, I asked for help, but she just said that she was fine.
The world ceased to exist for me, or rather I lost him mental. Their duties I performed, but automatically and, apparently, not so bad. I was a high-class professional. By the way, during lectures, I somehow calmed down. But most important — the preparation of the thesis, I could not. Also, when I was alone, I kept thinking about her. It was a kind of kaleidoscope of conflicting thoughts, which is not to convey on paper.
But especially killed me (I think that helped. — M. L.) one episode. Can't remember what I said to her, you may be asked to return. But she with irritation and replied: "I never loved you!" In me everything turned upside down, because I many women have trained just. Did she prudently bought my attention? I got all dizzy".
He said much more, but what is the point of all this is to retell!
We started to work with him. First of all, I advised him not to make yourself a hearty, go with a look that matches his mood. The team treated him well. Of course, anyone he didn't say anything, but who knew, understood, although many, as it turned out, I didn't understand.
At times when he saw her, he came to himself, but as soon as met her, so immediately returned to the previous depressive state. By the way, the army fired him, but part of him was not going and left to work for civilian employees and even created favorable conditions for scientific work.
Here's how he describes one of the aspects of their condition:
"When I'm with others — it's one person, when with her — a completely different person. Now, if I had to behave as I behave with others, I think she would be with me!"
An interesting dissociation, but it's not schizophrenic splitting. With great difficulty he forced himself to work on the dissertation and to learn new techniques. Whether deliberately, or guided by some instinct, she came to him in those moments when he was good. He enthusiastically told her everything, she listened and then sneered and enthusiastically told him about her experience.
I advised him to possess what was possessed by it, and to stop her to talk about their successes. Let about she learns from others. In addition, I advised him to begin to praise all its developments. (To turn into a Siren the siren, but male.) And if will work together, to take it in a subordinate position: "You have outgrown me, you are young, can use the authority of my name."
In the end, he abruptly went up on scientific lines. Barely met, but his thoughts, she continued to take, and if accidentally met, it was anxiously beating heart. Then at my suggestion he began to drop in to visit her, to carefully trace the mechanisms of the conflict.
And here's what he told me:
"After a few visits, I came to a conclusion: I'm coming. Serena greets me kindly, I begin to tell her about their success (of course, not all). For some time she listens to me carefully, with the participation and admiration. I get eager, satisfied in the extreme.
But suddenly notice that she starts to contradict me. I continue to defend their point of view. Then comes the moment when I hear a tone of condescension, as if I evaluate as being of a lower order. Then it becomes ironic, and even later — mocking. The initiative from me starts to go away, and the mood — fall.
I decided to be careful. In one of his visits I noticed the transition from admiration to mild objections. And instead of having to defend their opinion, suddenly she agree to all her objections, say goodbye quickly and leave, so she does not have time to discharge. During the farewell, I noticed her some confusion. I left quite relaxed and even joyful. These visits I had two. The end came in the third time. After I agreed with all of her objections and began to say goodbye, she turned on me almost with swearing.
The meaning of it was that I come to her, I bring her to a white heat, and then leaving without hearing her objections. I apologized and said that cannot allow all the irritation that has accumulated somewhere in other place, splashed on me, for I could not be the source of this irritation. We were talking on scientific subjects.
And only after that I felt free from it. She left and from my heart and mind. I now, passing by her house, don't even think about her. Sometimes you want to go, but somehow too busy. Of course, I remember about her, but don't remember".
Indeed, he said this time quietly, as if talking about someone else.
Dear reader, if you too feel victim to this Siren siren, I do not advise you to use these techniques unless you got serious psychological training. And my charge would not be worth doing, you'd better do something for yourself.
Easier and more economical to do their work, i.e. personal growth. Then the Sweet siren slowly moves from the heart into the stomach, then in the lower part of the abdomen, and later in the pelvis. And after one of the visits to the toilet you suddenly feel a great relief, and maybe not even notice how it happens.
We share everything! and 9 errors in the relationshipdo Not cheat yourself, especially on the way to the registry office and in the hospital!
For this reason I am reminded of a story one of my students:
"I had a very complicated relationship with my Sweet siren, until I became interested in his Affairs. There have been successes, and challenges, the wins and the losses. One day when she was singing the praises of me, I looked at her and thought, what is this woman doing around me and what is she talking about?".
Are there siren siren male? Yes, there are. And torture of women is not less than the SS-women of men.published
Author: Michael Litvak