Perfectionism is unnecessary painful pursuit of an unattainable perfection, taken to extremes. This desire to bring any thing to perfection, the tendency to present both themselves and others to high standards.
Perfectionist tries to prove to everyone that he is the most, most, most .... the best, flawless.
The main features of perfectionism:- Very high demands on himself;
- Focus on the "most successful";
- Constant comparison of ourselves with others;
- The perception of other people as demanding and criticizing;
- "Looping" from their mistakes and failures;
- Planning and evaluation activities on the principle of "all or nothing".
In everyday life, perfectionism causes a lot of problems. If the perfectionist has no time to do something properly ( and the to do anyhow, he has no right!), it's just not going to do anything. The desire to Polish up every detail, to bring any outcome to the ideal causes, a perfectionist almost always experiences dissatisfaction with the quality of work performed. He is very sensitive about criticism.
The perfectionist believes that it is not a brilliant result – no result. And this is a big mistake.
Causes of perfectionism can be very different. Each their own:
- Very often, perfectionism affects former students, accustomed to do everything just perfectly;
- Often hiding behind perfectionism fear negative evaluations: "This is a work in progress, not finished....";
- Sometimes, that perfectionism is a way longer to do what to do like what he does. This way, doing nothing to achieve the perfection, to gain time and to avoid work, which he wants to do;
The human desire to do any work is often alone because not so easy to find friends, the relevant ultra-high requirements. The desire to flawlessly execute even the smallest business takes a tremendous amount of time, so the person does not have time for rest and entertainment. Perfectionist is in constant tension, as great results need confirming. With others he prefers not to cooperate, and to compete and to compete.
Sooner or later, every perfectionist there is a feeling of hopelessness, fatigue and anxiety. As a consequence, on the background of chronic stress and fatigue arise weakness, headaches, aggravated chronic diseases, develops neurosis.
Perfectionism – a direct path to anxiety and depression. This is a serious problem of self-assertion and competitiveness. I remembered one of my friend who proudly told me that she, by day working as an accountant, almost daily until 2-3 o'clock in the morning scrubbed them clean cookware, negligible on both sides towels etc etc. the upshot is, unfortunately, extensive infarction at the age of 40. Her two sons of school age were left orphans....
What can you do to get rid of perfectionism?
First of all you need to bring order in your mind and stop confusing the pursuit of excellence from perfectionism. The desire of well to do their job – fine quality, which within reasonable limits is not perfectionism. If people can't afford to pass carelessly done work is not perfectionism, and responsible attitude. But if a person does not submit work on time only because he wants perfection, you only need him, and don't need others – that's perfectionism.
Therefore, the correct option:
- The quest for unjustified perfection to replace the desire for reasonable perfection, that is as good to do what you can within the time allocated for the case.
- To learn how to prioritize and allocate their efforts according to their degree of importance.
- To perceive failure as a natural part of life and treat them leniently.
- Often praise ourselves and see not only disadvantages but also advantages.
- Learn to get pleasure from life.
After all, even Kozma Prutkov said:"it is Impossible to grasp the immensity."
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Source: v-garmonii-s-soboi.ru/psihologicheskie-kompleksyi/perfektsionizm