Almost all of the problems that exist in today's society, not just start with the fact that the institution of family is destroyed. And the problem, due to which the institution of the family is destroyed, is that there is no mechanism thoughtful education of boys in the social system. In other words, the problem with which we are dealing with and that concerns all of us, that there is no system of education of the boys real leaders and real men.
And because of this, women feel unprotected, they are in anxiety and to cope with it, women are compelled to take on a leadership role. They do not want to depend on these men, they announce so-called freedom, and as a result of this "freedom and independence" suffer themselves women, children and the carousel begins. The image of the father and mother - is the first image of love that nourishes the baby. When a father and a mother, and is the image, which they love each other, there is something that is very important for the child.
The next factor of love, which is important for a child - is that parents love for him is. For example, when a child appears (it does not matter, it is the son or daughter), it is increasingly influenced by my mother. The child no longer has contact with it, because the first 9 months he was in the womb, he was in the sphere of its influence. At the 7th month of the child she understands almost everything he hears the sounds, feel the mood of the parents, and in this period is especially important that the father was particularly attentive to the mother.
Mother gives tenderness and love child, the father gives the tenderness and love of a mother. So together they feed the child.
Gradually the child, a son grows up and he continues to be in the sphere of influence of mothers. About 5-6 years (although he, too, feels his father's) mother for him - this is the first teacher. Thus the Vedas say that mothers have to have 1,000 times more respect than his father. Gradually the boy, so he grew up in a harmonious and successful, you need to go into the sphere of influence of his father. The child also feels a connection with her mother, but as the boy grows up, he should go into the sphere of influence of men gradually learn to take my father.
And because of this son is filled with more than the male, and when it is filled with the power of his father, he will have a natural tendency to respect the mother and with her mother to respect and appreciate all female. But if this transition occurs, the son remains in the sphere of influence of the mother, and does not take his father he rejects his father, the result of such a boy would not be able to respect women and men can not receive. And, growing up, he can not take full responsibility either for themselves or for a family.
And in fact, although physically he is growing and developing as a man, but psychologically the child is a boy, prone to, to frolic, to enjoy and to live effortlessly for himself, without taking responsibility for anyone. But if the son is separated from the mother and is filled with all male and from his father and grandfather, he can break away from the family and is very easy to go to an independent life. He becomes an adult, and when he turns to his parents, he has respect, love, gratitude. He takes love from both, stores that energy and can give it further.
We talked a lot about the boys, but you can not get around the question associated with the girls.
Girl born and grow up gradually, too, is some time in the mother influence. But at the age of 5-6 years, it realizes that there dad and dad is different from the mother. She naturally arises relationship with his father, and it is gradually moving into the sphere of influence of the pope.
Here it begins to absorb men's, father's strength. It is said that the first novel, the first interest to the male her daughter there with her father. In a good sense of romance. She falls in love with dad, and dad for a girl -. It is something very, very valuable
But if a girl while in his father's influence, comes to life in the same way as a boy, what do you think is the harmonious development? No, it's a boy. Because she remained relationship with her father and she did not take enough of the female, not engorged female and took over the momentum from his mother motherhood. And when the daughter comes out of the sphere of influence of the parents in their own life, she would look at her father, with whom she has a natural "novel", and then all future men will be looking for the same dad.
And most likely, it will not succeed, because no man would be able to replace her father, it is absolutely impossible. And so for the girls would be more harmonious stay in his father to take him for his protection, his love, attention, to feel how great it is, what wonderful men how they can care for, love. So she has a sense of security, understanding that all is well with men, with them, you can work together with them to live. And then (so much more correct) Pope with great love sends her mother into the sphere of influence, saying. "Mom a bit better»
And next to her mother she can respect the pope. And, accordingly, not only my father, but all men. Because now she has taken a lot of the female. Suffice female. And in this space, having received from the Father, and received from his mother, and now she can go to their own independent life. And having enough female, mother, she can be a mother, while respecting man and help to ensure that the man himself took the responsibility, he became the leader.
Of course, there is literally no way that "the child is separated from his mother and go to the Pope." This is what happens in the unconscious sphere of us as individuals. These are processes that take place inside of us that we are not aware. When puberty begins, the girl slowly there is interest in the pope. And when Dad takes her, gives her love, care, attention, gives her a lot of love for man, it is because of this she has a natural respect for the mother.
The principle is that the father should emphasize the authority of the mother in the eyes of the girl, and gradually return to her mother's sphere of influence. In other words, his verbal message should be: "Your main teacher, and your main authority - a mom. When my mother scolds you when Mom tells you something that you hate, she does it out of love for you. " And thus it strengthens the mother's credibility in the eyes of his daughter.
And just when Mom helps son to move into the sphere of influence of her father, she says, "when my father is strict with you or scold you, at the same time as the Pope manifested love to you and your dad is the best." So she helps his son to take his father. And so the parents together, as a pair, help each other to nurture the child authority to the contrary. And then the child can accept it with love, gratitude, and he filled himself and becomes a holistic, integrated personality.
It does not matter, a complete family or not, what matters is how parents relate to each other. If a child, for example, the daughter hears from his mother that "it is our responsibility, you do not need it to take" and "your father is very good", while my mother allows her daughter to meet with her father, she thus brings the girl a sense of respect to his father, and, therefore, the daughter will respect from men. Such a woman will attract into your life a reasonable, responsible, real men.
But if a girl goes into the sphere of influence of his father and remains in its sphere of influence, and then goes into a life and can not find a man like my father, then it is included in the various spheres of the complex. Most of these women are, or mistresses, or get into a difficult relationship with men.
What do children understand that it is not enough filled with masculine or feminine principle?
Never too late to live a happy childhood. There reception, and this technique is used in all traditions, but especially in the Vedic tradition.
Waking up in the morning, no need to hurry and run out of habit to brush your teeth. We need to consciously stop and consciously bring bows mother and father, presenting their way together. And ask for their blessing today. And in the evening, when you go to sleep, to do the same movement in the direction of the parents.
Then, imbued with respect for the parents, you can take them to both male and female, and filled it. In the Vedic tradition, the parents when taking bows from children, do not take it in his address, they understand that they are the conductors and the child is not their property. They passed it on to their children's respect for their parents, and so the chain was passed thanks to a higher source.
How to be a mother, if the child's step-father?
Stepfather does play an important role in a child's life. But it is important to understand and accept that it is the second, and the first Pope. And the father should be given a place in my heart, thanks, he gave the child life. Despite the fact that he left a son or daughter will always be associated with it. With a child just need to talk about it. You can hang the picture of his father, and there should be no sentiment of sorrow.
Better to cultivate joy and explained that "we parents loved each other, that you were born or born as a result. But it so happened that fate took our dad and step-father played an important role in your life, like your second dad. And while you may be a little more love to the first pope. You got that right. »
What if my husband is not lacking male?
A woman born of a father and mother, respectively, in women, too, have something masculine. Therefore, if a woman is raising her son alone, it is in addition to maternal love and affection can put boundaries for his son. Mom should not punish his son. Rather, when you want to punish, it is better to take the women's position and say: "I find it hard, please, help me." When she includes female position in the boy immediately turn Leadership male. But when a woman starts to yell, scream and peck at her son, she suppresses male in his son.
Even if a woman raising a boy and his father not around or he died, the father is still there. The father of the child is, and they have a relationship. On the father can talk, you can view photos together. You can also find, along with his son, select any event, where there are men, where there is a good coach, for example, football or swimming. The coach can say: "The child has no father, but since you are a good coach, a good specialist, could you at least a little bit to give the baby male attention? I need it. »
When a woman says "I need," no man will not give up. But when a woman requires a man always refused.
It is also important to know that the boy was brought up to 5-6 years, as a king, but later he was transferred to the next age period of life, which is called the "period of the servants." This is a time when it should become a servant or apprentice, he must cultivate their character. Earlier this transition in the sphere of male implemented in a way that gave her son the education of the teacher and the boy left home. Because the house - it is an internal space, and it is like a mother's sphere
If the son is only in this area, he does not understand what is happening, because he lives on all ready: Mom cooks, Dad delivers, and he does not even know where the space for its responsibility. When he moved into the family of the teacher, and there began to perform any duties. For example, he himself had to wake up, wipe the floor in his room, or he go for firewood, bring firewood to put in the oven, or he washed his clothes.
That is, there were given small responsibilities that are assigned to it. And gradually, the boy brought the qualities of character, and so nurtured the nature of this man. And the nature of this man is that it is absolutely independent principle. The man does not depend on external circumstances: if there is the food is delicious - well, no - take and prepare himself, if there are ready stroked pants - well, no - I did them poglazhu. That is the nature of this man can be expressed in the phrase "I am no one does not require».
And the development of the male principle also occurs due to the fact that developing a strong mind. And the reason - the ability to draw conclusions. Interestingly, the Vedic culture is described that there are 7 mothers, and each of the mothers have to give respect, and there are many fathers. Happiness in a single family - it is rather fantastic, especially in our age. Family - is a broader concept than just the physical, but rather a spiritual concept of spiritual unity of each other when there is a certain tradition and have a generic connection
It is believed that our mother is the wife of our teachers. The wife of the king, which controls the state, and the wife of a priest, too, are mothers. The woman who was our nurse, if my mother could not breast-feed or something happened, too, is our mother. The cow is our mother because she gives us milk, and due to the fact that there is a cow, there are fertilizer and earth gives us food.
There is also a father who gave physical birth and a father, who became a spiritual teacher and gives spiritual knowledge. There is a bull, he is considered the father, because thanks to the bull tills the soil and it becomes fertile, etc. It is a culture. When our mind becomes wider, so when we see the world, we feel greater security, we feel connected with many and with the whole universe. And then it is easier to live. And then we become happier.
Author: Sergey Avakov