Scintillating Pearl university teachers

Ends academic year, and is approaching the next session. And it is an occasion to recall the witty phrase of teachers and recharge your good mood before the exams.

< Website publishes a selection of quotes teachers who flashed not only the mind, but also a sense of humor. We wish all the students nor Good luck, and, as they say, a freebie, Catching

-! Losifovna Maria, and why do you need a folding knife with a
? - Well, I have him more interested in a tailspin ... What you looking at me? We actually French Department!
The lecture is heard the sound of coins.
- You have, in my opinion, the money fell. Ready for the meeting? Judging from the ringing volume, still not ready.
Lawyer without a sense of humor - a prosecutor
Consider the model of tree growth.. There is a cylindrical barrel radius kx. It has a hole through which water is pumped ... maybe alcohol, maybe something more interesting ...
- because corn performs miracles because corn - it myasokolbasa. ? I replied to your question
- For greater strength of clay should be naked ... Oh, baked
- The teacher explains the Gauss - Jordan, suddenly stops and turns to the audience:!
  - Oh, and you know that Gauss had 2 wives? While he was married, he could not open, I was an ordinary cobbler, as they dragged him to the bottom. That ran away from them - and the method of its opened. What's he done
- -! Girl, you have in something of a witch
  . - This is seen as a compliment
  ? - This is seen as a "otsyadte away»
- Why do I need to hurry to the first pair, if I die
  - the teacher asks the audience to indicate somewhere on the middle ranks:
    - Here you have a very clever person. Can you answer the question? What's your name?
    - Me? Kira.
    - Kira, you're beautiful .. A smart face young man next to you
  - In ancient Rome, there were shoes with heels, the more "lubutenov" henpecked but were still !..
  - There was a genre of medieval theater - morality. And I have a favorite character from there - a worm that corrodes the soul. As it portrayed? I appeared on the scene a man with a sign on which was written: "The worm, corrodes the soul," and everyone knew everything.
  - For example, let's take a break. I know a lot of information, we have to rest - well, did not go back to ...
  - - By the way, all of the holiday, in the sense in spring
    ! - Yesterday was World Day of seals
    . - Well ... then all fur seals
    plus sign. From the bowels of the audience:
    -. Meow
    - Does this uproar at least someone who has done their homework ? Though a righteous man?
      - The economic potential of the economic potential discord. There is economic potential sew pants, but there is the economic potential of making ballistic missiles.
      - Do you know what a rising and descending metaphors?
        "Her eyes were like turquoise" - a rising metaphor, but "her eyes as the brakes." - Descending
      - Remember, you are in one class was taught to draw such hooks? Teach you yet? So you have been taught to paint the sign of the double integral
      - -. You're reading Camus
        ? -. Yes
        - This is commendable, of course, but not at my lectures
      - If I am on Monday did not come to work, then you are very poorly written control and I have a heart attack <!. br>
        
        - Offset in what form?
        - The good: experience all the emotions and adrenaline rush. Extra session - it's an incredible feeling, certainly all have to try
        Nicotine is a weak drug, which is common in almost all countries!. And the plant itself is a terrific career
        -. Men have two meters of feminine beauty. The first - a distance. The woman went on, the more beautiful it is. And the second one say?
        - Alcohol?
        - That's right, a purely masculine approach
        Cribs - it's like a lecture ... only Barbie
        You come to the exam, already having five, most importantly -. Not to spoil her with his answer In the National People's Congress of deputies in 2987. If the exam, I ask you to call them all by name, know this: I have currencies
        
        See also: strong. >
        Pearls of teachers who do not climb into his pocket for a word
        25 pearls of teachers with a funky sense of humor
        
        via www.adme.ru/svoboda-narodnoe-tvorchestvo/25-perlov-prepodavatelej-s-obaldennym-chuvstvom-yumora-1137260/