19 techniques of psychological protection against manipulation

When using the suggested further ways of psychological protection from intrusive and manipulative actions of the following conditions must be met:

Clear verbal formulation.
A well-chosen tone.
Thoroughness in the response, which is achieved by keeping pauses before answering and deliberation response, treatment response in space.
Consider next the few effective ways to block unwanted or inappropriate attempts at manipulation.

1. Acceptance of an infinite refinement technique. Used when the communication partner emotionally requires something or something accusing. In this case, find out how you can be more precise and more all that was happening to him, not starting an argument, explanation or justification. Your partner may increase pressure, causing you to resist, but you have to grin and held positions in the human who wants to find out the opinion of another.

The ability to raise the question, which requires substantial and detailed answer, activates its own intellectual efforts. To ask a question or answer the question on the merits, it is necessary to consider, therefore, part of the energy of the charge transfer from the emotional to the rational flow. In addition, it won the time that the partner spends thinking response. Thus, asking clarifying questions, we have the time and energy in order to prevent the feelings overwhelm us.

2. Receiving Technique external consent or Guidance fog. This technique is particularly effective against unfair criticism or outright rudeness. Confident man apparently agrees, although it can not change its position. For example:

"What an unexpected idea! I'll think about it ... »;
"I think about how I consider it in the work»;
"I think if it has to do with me»;
"Maybe ...»

3. Receiving a broken record technique. In response to the attack target formulates capacious phrase that contains important information the attacker. The phrase should be such that it can be repeated several times without breaking meaningfulness conversation. The phrase should be pronounced as a jammed plate, with the same intonation. there should not be any "metal" in tone, or "poison." This technique uses the old rule:

Please tell them that it is going to tell them.
Then tell them what you are going to tell them.
Then tell them what you told them.

4. Admission English professor Technique. Partner correctly expresses doubt about the fact that the implementation of someone else's requirements do not violate his personal rights:

"George, could you speak a little slower and shorter sentences, so that I can translate more accurately?»

"I'm afraid not ... You see, talk fast and long sentences - it's part of my identity»

Possible answers:

"This is the subject of my beliefs»;

"If I do this, I will no longer I»;

"This is not consistent with my concept of myself».

Reception 5. Calm and alienation. Effective psihozaschita requires a certain psychological coldness and alienation. Anger, fear, anger, surprise, happiness must be stopped before specific actions to be taken psihozaschite. If these emotions completely difficult to stop, it is necessary to complicate and transform - anger and hatred transformed into sarcasm, fear and surprise - in alertness, joy -. In the irony, etc. If you get angry, or angry - you lose

. Reception 6. Search and connection of additional factors that can influence the situation. There is always a potential situational forces that work on us - whether it's time, people, social stereotypes, some parallel events. Maybe it will fit all arm rule of the situation, "adjusting" it for themselves. Someone planned communication at home? - Move it to the street! For you alone are trying to influence? - Raise the topic in the company! Change situational field so that it has become a stranger to the manipulator and created additional benefits for you.

Admission 7. Preliminary training in a foreign field. Periodically practice is atypical behaviors - to break its usual role and personal image. On the one hand it increases the degree of freedom of behavior, on the other - makes you less predictable

. Reception 8. Do not take someone else's evaluation of the situation. If you take someone's assessment of the situation and started to plan some actions in accordance with this assessment - got his arm. We must not only reject the wrong situational framework, but also to offer his own assessment of the situation. Your freedom from imposed someone frames may begin with the phrase: "And now let me tell you how I see it all ..." - and then it is already possible to draw a picture of the situational point, it is beneficial to you

. Reception 9. If possible, do not take the obligations imposed on you from the outside. It is better to suffer short-term losses in money, time, and power than to take to perform seemingly non-critical for you to obligations that are imposed from the outside. It is necessary to proceed from the fact that it is important first of all obligations to a.

Reception 10. The ability to change the relationship. It must be remembered that any interpersonal situation is reversible: there is always an opportunity to step back from any interpersonal situation and say, controls and manipulates (whether it is the boss, spouse (s), policies, and so forth.) "I can continue to live without your love, friendship, location, ill-treatment, even if that life will be difficult for me - as long as you do not stop doing A and B do not start »

. Reception 11. Avoid provoked by thoughtless action. If someone insists that something was done "immediately" should never agree with this at once. To get started, take the time to think about the situation and provide further information. It should also insist on a clear explanation. Weak explanations are signs of fraud or lack of knowledge of the alleged interlocutor informed.

Reception 12. Critical perception of the situational requirements. It is a critical approach to any situational requirements, no matter how trivial they may seem: role relationships and rules are always to be understood, but not always - be taken. Group rituals, slogans, duties and obligations - all this for some reason, you need someone. The requirements arising from the situation, does not always binding.

Reception 13. In the life of almost no simple solutions. If someone speaks of "simple solutions" your difficult personal, social and political problems, it is most likely not true.

Reception 14. There is no instant "affection." There is no such thing as a sudden and unconditional love, trust and friendship from strangers. Friendship and trust are always evolving with the times and usually include interchange, overcoming and complicity -te preliminary work on both sides. Therefore, the "sudden love" and "suddenly arose" friendship are likely to be the situational background, which creates a manipulator to better influence for you.

15. Receiving Office itself from all. Avoid "total situations" when turning and indicate "all", and not to you personally. In such situations, very little personal control and freedom, so immediately should define the boundaries of their own autonomy and to be sure to prepare the psychological and physical way to escape.

16. Receiving your mistakes - your problem. Seek immediately recognize the symptoms of "guilt" provoked you by someone, and never act on the basis of the motive of guilt. Mistakes are inevitable, but it is - your mistakes. So do not rush to correct errors in the way that you have not planned.

Reception 17. In every situation, there is something new. Pay attention to what you are doing "typical situation". You can not let habit and standard current procedure to force you to act without thinking - because each successive "typical situation" is always a little different, and your templates of action you can always use due to their high predictability

. Reception 18. Do not bind yourself past behavior. When someone mentions your "reliability" - is always alert. After all, there is absolutely no need to maintain consistency between your actions at different times - and you, and you can change the situation. Therefore, the "secure" status is always somewhat phony, because it provides some kind of action and reaction, not depending on the situation, but on the "reliability" of the status. It is much preferable to the status of "the adequacy of the situation»

. Reception 19. flimsy - act! It is not enough just to understand that there has been manipulation - you should always be prepared to openly disobey, defend, challenge and undergo the consequences of such behavior
. Author: Andpey Calov