What people call love is often a love addiction

In his youth, most girls think that love - it is such a natural thing that happens in the life of nearly everyone. And if someone did not happen today, it will happen in the future. You just have to find the same man, and that's it - love

. After many years of observation, the analysis of our own experience and the experience of others is evident that love - a rare, extremely rare feeling. In the truest sense of the word, where there is mutual respect, recognition of the value of each other, mutual development, conscious loyalty. What people usually call love is often a love addiction.

It begins with enthusiasm, romantic, alluring, attractive with a riot of hormones and fluids. Not having time to really get to know each other, people get emotional and sexual relationship, sincerely believing that here is raided by the very bright and welcome feeling - love. Love can begin with the chemistry of love is always based on the knowledge and acceptance of the other person.

© Dariusz Klimczak

In the euphoria of love cease to live separate from each other's lives: throw your hobby, forgotten relatives carelessly do the work, care for children, if any, are necessary. All thoughts and desires connected with the object of passion. With him very well without him very badly. If at this time the couple does not appear common business interests, if they did not advance in the recognition of each other, if you do not remember about his own life, but only sensations satisfied next to the beloved or lover, the couple takes the hard path of love addiction. Periods when together well, will be reduced, and in periods of isolation is still bad. In the end, people will reach the point that it will be bad and bad together - apart. Light, joy and ease of all withdraw from these relations.

Will the usual situation where one humiliates and offends another, but "we have the same love" - ​​still the perfect excuse, so all is forgiven. Someone does not give to another study, but nothing, "the interests of the family is more important." Some scandals and clarification on the subject: "Where have you been (or was)?" If another delayed for fifteen minutes, and requires a regular report on the location. Or, for example, a woman is offended and ceases to speak with a man, if he left on Saturday on a fishing trip, football, at a meeting with fellow students, but without it. Or a man forbids a woman to dance, yoga and other hobbies, because "you're family." Check phone calls and SMS, social networks, business correspondence even become a way of life, and suspicion, jealousy, mistrust, resentment and conflicts - the same attributes of marriage

. Behind all this is the expectation that the other, which is next to fill the spiritual emptiness and takes a life time. In such a relationship is constantly pops silent or expressed by the claim: "You must make me happy (or happier), and you do not cope with it." "Be with me", "do not leave me", "How can you live without me?", "How can you be okay without me?" - People chain shackled to each other

. This is not because someone is poor, and some good, in co-dependent relationships, both partners get to complexes and psychological traumas. For example, one is afraid of intimacy, another love is not always enough. He who is afraid will flee and distance, those who earnestly wants to be loved, will pull up or try to earn the love of all available means. They may turn the tables, because these are two extremes of one game.

In fact, love is enough depends on who it is. Love begins with self-love and self-acceptance. The holistic human soul love lives always. This ability to enjoy life, to love all its manifestations, is in this pleasure and implementation, to be full and complete. Only man is capable of loving. And this ability is not at all. Often the maximum that a person can build in a relationship - it is addictive. He does not see, does not understand, he does not feel differently.

Love - it is a free choice. Not for the apartment, not for children, not because of fear of loneliness. "I'm with you because you're the best for me (or better). I will not die without you, but with you my life brighter, richer and warmer. "
Author: Lily Ahremchik


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