593
About the only reason to marry
I have a son, and I have a daughter. And I have my own personal nightmare. It concerns the moment when my beautiful daughter, I was wearing on the hands that change the diapers and with which we watched the evening on the lights outside the window one day lead some excuse, idiot and say, "Dad, now that the hedgehog will live with us».
More precisely - to live with us and sleep with her.
Almost certainly, for some reason it seems to me this is not an invited guest will be messy, poor, ill-educated, he would have long unkempt hair, and his attitude towards my baby will be far less chivalrous, as I would like. Yes, and he will have plenty of disgusting domestic habits.
In a word, it would be my exact copy, adjusted for age.
And in order to slightly reduce their own anxiety as the eldest daughter is only eight, not even to buy a Mauser and vicious dog, try to say out loud - why, in fact, would be worth it suddenly get married. By the way, her son, who is only able to crawl and bite three teeth, probably also would not hurt to read this opus ever dtsat years later.
< Although I would try my dear father to write to me something like this - I probably would not have understood. Yet venture.
Let's start from the contrary. What are the reasons to marry / marry unsuitable categorically.
The insignificant reason for the number zero. Do not marry someone because he really want this, because I feel sorry for him or any other cause other people's desires. However, dear children, I know that you're not idiots, and I will not talk in detail why you should not.
Corporal attraction h3> I know not one, not two, or even four couples who were married - if you remove extra words of - because sex like, and without a stamp in the passport and the ceremony in the temple did not allow belief or strict parents . All these couples or decayed, or what is called a "very bad living».
Just because sex itself, generally speaking, quite quickly tired and is not intended for long-term home. Moreover, if it is simple and natural as dinner, he tired more quickly. For the sake of bodily pleasures can be together for a while, but not very long. If you are planning a life together, you should look for the reasons for this is more serious.
Any external circumstances h3> Age, peer pressure, indications confessor, will parents successfully folding events, "sign from above" and other fleeting tinsel. All of these reasons are not enough for marriage, because it is removed from marrying responsible for their choices.
In the future, when it becomes salty, they will want to play back and hide behind an impenetrable wall of "I do not decide, it has developed itself." The only question is, who will pass first the nerves - but it will be bad for both.
By the way, the marriage "of aerial" applies here too. With the amendment that will be bad already at least three.
Household considerations h3> marry rich in hope of his wealth and further carefree life is an act of sale, and not love, and do it should not - some things belong to us is not strong enough, so we can sell them. For this sort of thing applies, in particular, our soul, and marriage is increasingly Union souls than of bodies - conduct a joint household or sleeping together can any two people, and a husband and wife, two friends are unlikely to.
However, if you still dare to such a deal - and then its worth as a trade issue with all the shameful details such as the marriage contract. Otherwise, your company is too strong position legally, and morally, too, which again will end badly in a conflict situation.
Loneliness and the feeling of unrealized in life h3> Usually, in such a situation is something the opposite of "fair trade" and enters into this kind of relationship is initially planning to play. When selling yourself for wealth people trying to get more and evaluate yourself as high as possible, because the night is dark, the road is far, and the prospects are vague and it is necessary to have time to get their income as long as possible.
In case if a person is pushing for marriage loneliness and fear, he is not trying to get the most, and "takes what is", that is, the minimum content. «It is better this way than not at all»
Do not "fooled" on the hornblende. Not a bit of it is not better. By the difficult situation where it is difficult when the patient when the cold nights and bleak days, such a union can not add anything - but it takes a minimum of freedom available and greatly curtail comfort. And how to get the Union will not be a union of two free, connected in mutual agreement, but rather an act of mercy to one another, which puts people at a disadvantage, and the hope for full respect will have to seriously cut.
Getting married is only in a situation where all of these considerations are immaterial. When the fire in the body dimmed when no one from whom is independent and will not be affected financially when everyone has, if anything, to do and apart marriage.
Simply put, marriage should come only when when it is not needed. Marriage should be a luxury and fads, whims and adventure rather than solving problems of current or anticipated but, in fact, the problem of the "what we are not married. " If we are two people decided to complicate my life so that it is not simply settled with, but plan to live together for life, then the decision should be motivated exclusively from inside.
By the way, please note that spouse - it's almost the only person in the whole of your life, which will be with you man. All others will be part of your life and leave her with varying functionality - friend, colleague, companion. Your contact with the rest of the people will be restricted, and the marriage will have to deal with the whole person in its entirety, almost certainly - ugly.
Therefore, do not take its decision until the moment when you realize that you can see in front of you is a person, not his body, his brilliant prospects, his intellect, or his own comfort in his presence.
In marriage as such generally has no purpose other than the unity of the people with each other - that mysterious unity that can only be between a man and a woman, make up the family, and which can not be anything replaced. Two friends - it is not a marriage, and lovers - this is not a marriage. Even friends who sleep together, or lovers, who are joint household - again something not.
Therefore, my dear daughter, or dear son (well, suddenly you still read it), I can give only one audible advice - bind their lives with a man only when you want it to connect a life with a specific person, and when that desire will be free and clear.
Or this: h3> Once upon a time long ago, one woman asked her man: "Why do you love me?»
First, he wanted to say that she is beautiful. However, I realized that this is not enough: thousands of beautiful women around. Then he wanted to say that it's because she loves him, but it was not enough - not only the woman loved the man. Then he tried to talk about the mind and about the sense of humor, and about delicious soup - but the soup in the restaurant was even better, and clever ironic interlocutors while it was possible to pave the road - so they divorced. And even thought about how good it it turned out to be incomplete truth - after all, you can always find the thrill in life and stronger. Especially since the words do not help that bad without it.
And there was only one.
He replied, "Because you - it is you».
That's when you can repeat, without self-deception and the desire to please someone else - probably is already married. However, all these considerations you, dear children, probably will not be read.
Author: Vladimir Berkhin
via www.matrony.ru/o-edinstvennoy-prichine-vstupat-v-brak/
Abandoned cat and the little boy became friends - do not pour water
How to speak in public without trembling at the knees