Relationship - delicate matter. And we think some of their natural characteristics, even though they pose a danger.
Website publishes a list of the six most dangerous habits, which we treat leniently.
When it comes to relationships, we often find ourselves unprepared for them. In many ways, the problem lies in the fact that we normally refer to certain habits, which erode mutual affection.
1. The game "Who is stronger fuckedĀ» h2> What is. Partners commemorated by each other past mistakes and lead virtual account points. If the pair can not go to the next stage, the relationship turned into an endless game of "Who stronger fucked up." Such relationships are of this flour.
Why it's bad. Scoring and constant recollection of past mistakes leads to dissatisfaction and attempt to make a guilty partner, rather than solve the problem.
What to do. Stop to remember past mistakes partner. Forget about counting points. It does not matter the failure partner three years ago. Everyone - the sum of past actions, so take it for what it is.
2. Hints and passive aggression h2> What is. Instead of talking openly about their desires and concerns partner as it pushes you to the right decision and you secretly revenge.
Why it's bad. This shows that you are closed when communicating with a partner. There is no excuse for passive-aggressive behavior, which causes uncertainty and false sense of security.
What to do. to talk openly about their problems and desires. And you realize that your partner will support you.
3. Emotional blackmail h2> What is. One of the partners, complaining about the behavior of another, threatening to break off relations. Instead of saying "I think you are to me indifferent," such people say, "I can not meet with a man who does not show me any feelingsĀ».
Why it's bad. This is emotional blackmail creates a ton of unnecessary problems. Every little quarrel swells to the size of an elephant. Partners is important to feel that they can express their dissatisfaction without prejudice relations as such. Otherwise, people suppress their feelings, leading to mistrust and manipulation.
What to do. to worry because of problems in the relationship perfectly. This means that you are a normal person. But it is important to understand that the attachment to the person and love - are two different things. Partners who can calmly discuss the problem without blackmail and accusations, strengthen relationships.
4. The prosecution in the partner's own experiences h2> What is. Let's say you had a bad day. The only thing you want - to go home. At such moments, it is important not to vent their bad mood on the partner. He is not to blame for the fact that everything is so bad.
Why it's bad. Blaming partner in their own negative emotions - it is a subtle form of selfishness and a classic example of the inability to separate the personal from the general. When you blame the partner for their own bad feelings, you create a precedent now that you and your partner will emerge association between negative mood and actions of the second half, although they are not connected. The life of one of the partners begins to revolve around a different mood.
What to do about it. Take responsibility for their emotions. Remember: when people feel guilty, it gives them an incentive to hide their feelings and manipulate each other.
5. Unhealthy jealousy h2> What is. you annoyed that your partner a lot of talking with the other person. You become suspicious and try to control the partner's social circle: checking his phone, mail, social networks.
Why it's bad. Some people believe that the absence of jealousy - a sign of indifference. But really jealous creates a huge problem. He humiliates partner destroys trust relationship.
What to do. Trust partner. Trite, but no other way. A little jealous of course. But do not go too far. Do not humiliate the partner. You have to cope with bouts of jealousy.
6. Shopping and gifts as problem solving h2> What is. After a big argument, many couples do not understand the problem, and try to forget about them by using shopping or expensive gifts.
Why it's bad. It's not only pushes the problem in the relationship on the back burner, but also brings commercialism. What if the guy after each infraction will drive a girl to a restaurant? This will give it an incentive to continually make guilty partner. The result - an irresponsible attitude, constantly offended girl and the guy, you feel the ATM.
What to do. Solve the problem in the relationship. The trust has been undermined? Talk about it. Someone feels undervalued? Listen partner, take action. Naladte contact. Gifts can not restore confidence and healthy atmosphere. Make gifts, not because it's bad, but because everything is good. Do not cover them their problems.
via lifehacker.ru/2015/11/06/6-toxic-relationship-habits/