661
The Stone Guest. In life, I would not believe in such
Stone guest This was one of those winter nights postnovogodny, when I was still very inexperienced fourth-year student of medical institute was on duty in the surgical ward of some hospitals.
Around midnight life in the department of "boiling": enter the patients carried out the operation, darting back and forth sister.
At twelve o'clock the fuss fades away and one in the morning everything is asleep: who on narrow sofas ordinatorskoj who chairs in the hallway and who you're lucky - will capture a comfortable, soft bed in an empty Chamber.
After a long and fruitless search for a place to sleep, I decided to occupy the operating table.
Not even a table and operational examination table.
I, a young fellow, and very well-fed, it was worth a lot of sweat to ride this cute heart of every woman throne.
Deadheading a while I realized that the chair is very short, and we have to stay in it all the canons of gynecology.
Sell my feet wherever necessary and pulling the diaper health (in the operating room is pretty cool), lulled by the sound of the January blizzard, I happily went to sleep sleep of the just ...
- Doctor! Doctor, get up! Await you in the waiting room! - I hear a dream. - Doctor, stand up as well! Now it's your turn! With barely opened his watering eyes, I saw a ghost.
No, it was certainly not a ghost.
It was an older-change surgeon P. dressed from head to toe in a long, white sheet with triangular stamps bolnitsy.Vzglyanuv at his watch, and noting with sadness the third hour of the night, I tried to pull his legs numb from the damn chair design.
Baggage for about ten minutes, I finally pulled the right leg, and after ten minutes and left. All this time the surgeon P. stood in the doorway and looked looked at my suffering.
- Well, there is one hell brought? - I ask.
- I do not know. Go and see. If something urgent call me. For nothing do not worry. I'm going to sleep. - And a ghost majestically departed.
I'm cursing myself, I went to the emergency room and the first thing I saw was old age, that way, ninety. Grandma was sitting on the couch, his legs dangling in slippers and smoking a cigarette stench. When he saw me, Grandma winked at me and hissed:
- Is that you, eh Dokhturov?
- I, Grandma, I am. Tell me, what brings you night in this house of mourning?
- Why, my dear, Chui a stomach ache. Here mulberries - at the bottom. - Lie down on the couch. I examine you.
- Oh, a diamond mine, and maybe hlizmu deliver, and I will go? - Hopefully I asked the old woman.
- Lie down, lie down! I was not going to rant with her and wanted to inspect her stomach, then released without finding the disease grandmother, chastised her for the night hooliganism as a simulation or, at worst, to raise it to the department.
- Lift the shirt! Juicy spit on the tip of his cigarette, and Overshot, resulting in a spit hit my pants, grandmother zabychkovala cigarette butt on the wall, and lay down on the couch.
When she lifted her shirt I saw in the abdomen volume formation, the size of a good melon.
Well, I think one of two things: either the cancer, and then was covered grandmother, or a hernia, and if it is necessary to raise the station and to operate in the morning. First, I immediately dismissed the cancer grows long and undetected for so long can not be. Probably still a hernia. But you have to feel.
But I put my hands on her stomach, I was taken aback: under my hands clearly detectable formation of a child's head. I distinguished nose, ears, and a little lower and shoulders.
- Well, there INTO Milan? - I asked the old woman smiled enigmatically. Do not answer to her question, I rushed to the phone and called the surgeon P.
Very dissatisfied surgeon P. was five minutes and asked in a sleepy voice: - What ?! I took her aside and not knowing how to express it better weakly mumbled:
- It is ... well like that ...
- What is that ?!
- Well ... she's pregnant!
- What?! - Eyes bulged surgeon P. - Pregnant? It is 87 years old !!! And what you just taught in the institute!
- So after all arms, legs ... - I weakly justified.
- Pens! Feet! You have the floor to determine Losers! Write a diagnosis and want to lift her up. Hernia her. And do not you dare wake me anymore because of such trifles. And the surgeon P. went to inspect his dream.
I ordered the department to raise the granny and sat down to write the medical history. Column I diagnosed and recorded: pregnancy 30-32 weeks (for left to his own). I finish, and went to sleep, anticipating morning thrashing at the Orientation meeting. And it did ...
Chief doctor shouted as never before. Professors sputtered promising me a deuce on state exams surgery.
Most indignant senior surgeon P .: dare to wake her in the night ...
After flying detachment went to see granny whole crowd. Professor J. put his hands on her belly. A minute later, a smile on his face was replaced by an expression of astonishment.
- Hmm! - He said, and gave way to the head physician. Chief doctor sat down beside the patient and repeat the procedure. Barely a minute later, he got up and said with a pale face - on the table!
Babka opened, and found in her womb petrified fetus corresponding 30-31 week of pregnancy! My triumph was no limit ...
Grandmother Priepert the wall said that at the dawn of her misty youth surrendered in a haystack young shepherdess, and became pregnant by him. Fearing the shame and trying to get rid of the unwanted child of a young courtesan visited the local wise woman and one poohat, introduced her to something in the gut, causing calcified fetus, it is simply petrified. And only after 70 years (and for children it did not have), "The Stone Guest" why the move. That's the story.
Sent by Dr. Ariel Chaikin
Around midnight life in the department of "boiling": enter the patients carried out the operation, darting back and forth sister.
At twelve o'clock the fuss fades away and one in the morning everything is asleep: who on narrow sofas ordinatorskoj who chairs in the hallway and who you're lucky - will capture a comfortable, soft bed in an empty Chamber.
After a long and fruitless search for a place to sleep, I decided to occupy the operating table.
Not even a table and operational examination table.
I, a young fellow, and very well-fed, it was worth a lot of sweat to ride this cute heart of every woman throne.
Deadheading a while I realized that the chair is very short, and we have to stay in it all the canons of gynecology.
Sell my feet wherever necessary and pulling the diaper health (in the operating room is pretty cool), lulled by the sound of the January blizzard, I happily went to sleep sleep of the just ...
- Doctor! Doctor, get up! Await you in the waiting room! - I hear a dream. - Doctor, stand up as well! Now it's your turn! With barely opened his watering eyes, I saw a ghost.
No, it was certainly not a ghost.
It was an older-change surgeon P. dressed from head to toe in a long, white sheet with triangular stamps bolnitsy.Vzglyanuv at his watch, and noting with sadness the third hour of the night, I tried to pull his legs numb from the damn chair design.
Baggage for about ten minutes, I finally pulled the right leg, and after ten minutes and left. All this time the surgeon P. stood in the doorway and looked looked at my suffering.
- Well, there is one hell brought? - I ask.
- I do not know. Go and see. If something urgent call me. For nothing do not worry. I'm going to sleep. - And a ghost majestically departed.
I'm cursing myself, I went to the emergency room and the first thing I saw was old age, that way, ninety. Grandma was sitting on the couch, his legs dangling in slippers and smoking a cigarette stench. When he saw me, Grandma winked at me and hissed:
- Is that you, eh Dokhturov?
- I, Grandma, I am. Tell me, what brings you night in this house of mourning?
- Why, my dear, Chui a stomach ache. Here mulberries - at the bottom. - Lie down on the couch. I examine you.
- Oh, a diamond mine, and maybe hlizmu deliver, and I will go? - Hopefully I asked the old woman.
- Lie down, lie down! I was not going to rant with her and wanted to inspect her stomach, then released without finding the disease grandmother, chastised her for the night hooliganism as a simulation or, at worst, to raise it to the department.
- Lift the shirt! Juicy spit on the tip of his cigarette, and Overshot, resulting in a spit hit my pants, grandmother zabychkovala cigarette butt on the wall, and lay down on the couch.
When she lifted her shirt I saw in the abdomen volume formation, the size of a good melon.
Well, I think one of two things: either the cancer, and then was covered grandmother, or a hernia, and if it is necessary to raise the station and to operate in the morning. First, I immediately dismissed the cancer grows long and undetected for so long can not be. Probably still a hernia. But you have to feel.
But I put my hands on her stomach, I was taken aback: under my hands clearly detectable formation of a child's head. I distinguished nose, ears, and a little lower and shoulders.
- Well, there INTO Milan? - I asked the old woman smiled enigmatically. Do not answer to her question, I rushed to the phone and called the surgeon P.
Very dissatisfied surgeon P. was five minutes and asked in a sleepy voice: - What ?! I took her aside and not knowing how to express it better weakly mumbled:
- It is ... well like that ...
- What is that ?!
- Well ... she's pregnant!
- What?! - Eyes bulged surgeon P. - Pregnant? It is 87 years old !!! And what you just taught in the institute!
- So after all arms, legs ... - I weakly justified.
- Pens! Feet! You have the floor to determine Losers! Write a diagnosis and want to lift her up. Hernia her. And do not you dare wake me anymore because of such trifles. And the surgeon P. went to inspect his dream.
I ordered the department to raise the granny and sat down to write the medical history. Column I diagnosed and recorded: pregnancy 30-32 weeks (for left to his own). I finish, and went to sleep, anticipating morning thrashing at the Orientation meeting. And it did ...
Chief doctor shouted as never before. Professors sputtered promising me a deuce on state exams surgery.
Most indignant senior surgeon P .: dare to wake her in the night ...
After flying detachment went to see granny whole crowd. Professor J. put his hands on her belly. A minute later, a smile on his face was replaced by an expression of astonishment.
- Hmm! - He said, and gave way to the head physician. Chief doctor sat down beside the patient and repeat the procedure. Barely a minute later, he got up and said with a pale face - on the table!
Babka opened, and found in her womb petrified fetus corresponding 30-31 week of pregnancy! My triumph was no limit ...
Grandmother Priepert the wall said that at the dawn of her misty youth surrendered in a haystack young shepherdess, and became pregnant by him. Fearing the shame and trying to get rid of the unwanted child of a young courtesan visited the local wise woman and one poohat, introduced her to something in the gut, causing calcified fetus, it is simply petrified. And only after 70 years (and for children it did not have), "The Stone Guest" why the move. That's the story.
Sent by Dr. Ariel Chaikin
