Aneki about the old man.

The old English lord goes to the doctor.
You know, doctor, I married a pretty young lady six months ago, but she can’t get pregnant, can you give me some advice?
- How old are you, sir?
- 75.
- And your wife?
- She's 25.
Take your wife, hire a young secretary and go on your yacht for a two-by-three month trip. You know, the sea air sometimes does wonders!
Six months later, the old lord visits the doctor.
- Thank you so much, Doctor! The sea air really does wonders! My wife is pregnant!
- How is the young secretary? - The doctor asked.
- You know, she's pregnant too! The sea air does wonders!

An old man in his 90s is sitting on a park bench crying bitterly.
Here comes a young man, saw a crying old man, went to him and asked what was the matter.
“I’m in love with a 25-year-old girl,” the old man replied through tears.
What’s wrong with that? the young man asked.
Sobbing, the old man says,
- You don't understand. Every morning before we go to work, we go to work.
She comes home for lunch and we're banging again. Then she cooks my favorite food. When she comes back from work, she gives me a great blow job.
And then, after dinner, we're banging, banging, banging all night.
The old man burst into tears again, unable to cope with himself. The young man hugged him by the shoulders and said:
To be honest, I don’t quite understand you. What you just told me sounds like a perfect family relationship. I don't understand why you're crying?
The old man sobbed and through tears answered:
- I forgot where I live...

There was a grandpa. Says the old woman:
- Old lady, let's go blind the kolobok and let him build the first computer in the forest.
Grandma agreed, made a kolobok, instructed him to build a computer.
Kolobok rolls through the forest, sees the wolf coming. The kool asks him:
Wolf, and Wolf, do you want to become a system block?
- What is that?
This means that you will sit and people will feed you themselves: floppy disks, disks.
- I want to! - said Wolf and became a system unit.
It's going on. Suddenly he sees a fox, he says to her:
Lisa, and Lisa, do you want to be a monitor?
- What is that?
Well, that's when you look at people, peek, and they won't suspect anything.
- I want to! - said Lisa and became a monitor.
Kolobok rolled on. There's a hedgehog crossing the road. He stopped him and asked, “Hedgehog, and Hedgehog, do you want to be a keyboard?”
- What is that? This is when people will scratch your back, but stroke every day, and you will lie down.
I want to! said the Hedgehog and became a keyboard.
Keep going. He sees the mouse running. He caught her and asked, “A mouse, a mouse, do you want to be a computer mouse?”
- What is this, and how?
This is when people take you by the skin every day and drag you on the mat back and forth, back and forth.
- Fuck you, Kolobok!!!
Since then, the mouse has a stick in the ass...