I always thought I was lucky with my husband, but recently I started wondering if that was the case.

Family relationships are not always about love, understanding, and butterflies. There are counterexamples when people quarrel, resent each other and generally behave as if they did not give each other an oath of loyalty at the altar. And that's okay! Negative human emotions They tend to accumulate and release at the most inappropriate moments. That's what you can do.



Takprosto But that's not the point. The main thing is that adults who love each other should be able to extinguish conflicts, especially those that essentially begin over trifles. Yeah, it's not always convenient. Yes, there are insults and even insults. But this is all nonsense if the happiness of your family, harmony and well-being are at stake. If the conflict cannot be resolved amicably, invite a specialist, let him figure it out. Then try again. Solving a problem is not always easy. But it is, just need to put a little more effort into it.

I write here because I just don’t know who else to share my emotions and experiences with. I don't know how it happened, but because of some nonsense, my marriage is now in danger. Or I'll have to put up with it, lift my legs up and bow to my husband. Which is worse, we have to decide.

My husband, Timur, is an IT specialist. Not some terrified junior, but quite a strong middle peasant. In some offices, I would even go for the lord. Well, according to him, of course. That's money and respect, I'll tell you. He's been married once before. He is 29 years old and my family is very happy. If not for all these moments with the struggle for habitat. I'm tired of all this, you would know.



In general, his ex-husband left his former apartment to his ex-wife. They somehow came together in terms of finances and everything else, I did not go into it. And it so happened that we agreed to live with me. My living space has 2 large rooms, a decent renovation that I once did for myself, and in general, we are in a good area, so there is no problem with this. At the same time, Timur offered to personally pay for communal housing, food, rest and other related expenses. Which I was quite comfortable with at first.

Although I’m younger than my husband, my personality is very different. I am used to mundane things and the philosophy of materialism. But Timur is not. He does yoga, listens to some very special music, periodically starves or eats raw food. I'm not close, but Timur is very dear to me and I love him. So, he still copes with his duties: we always have enough, I can afford to go shopping with my husband's card and so on. But there's a problem.



As I said, in my apartment I did the repairs. That doesn't mean I have pink girl wallpapers in my rooms and Robert Pattinson posters. No, the usual modern renovation, without carpets on the floor and unnecessary visual noise. However, it turned out that Timur does not like such an interior. And he asked me to remodel one room so that he could rest in it, body and soul. Nothing serious, just a cosmetic rearrangement.

A day later, I didn’t recognize my home. It was a nightmare. Here and there hung dream catchers, some rags with Tibetan writings, drawings of dragons, tigers and other scribbles. Underfoot lay exotic drums, vases, pipes and all sorts of other stuff. There was even a car, a projector. She displayed laser beams on the ceiling, playing looped animations with running animals or praying monks on it. And in the middle of all this ugliness, Timur sat in the lotus position on some special boards. And meditating. It only caused me negative emotions.



Naturally, this situation did not suit me. Which I told my husband right away. However, he referred to our original agreement, and I just didn’t know what to say. It was even sadder to listen to my friends, whom I specifically invited to visit us, so that they would support me and tell Timur that he was wrong in this situation. No, they took the side of the spouse and began to praise him for his own taste and such “exotic” views.

Most of all, I freaked out when my friend, a former classmate with whom I had a particularly warm relationship, directly accused me of not complying with the terms of the contract. Like, I do not hesitate to take money for purchases, but I cannot provide Timur with comfort. Just imagine. We've known her for over 10 years, and she saw my husband that day for the third or fourth time. And so set me up. The other guests were against me that night.



What am I supposed to do now? I didn't know my husband and I were gonna make a real estate deal. Like in a hotel, we bring you everything you need, and you pay us. I was hoping we'd be a family. We have children, we will live together, develop and make good money. Or why is all this necessary?! So no, it was also my fault, because I don't want to turn my apartment into a dump full of aromatic sticks!

Timur is not a conflict man, so he didn’t say a word to me all this time. But it's been two days since we had this conversation. Something needs to be decided, and quickly. After all, all this garbage continues to lie in the living room. Thank God I sleep and rest in another room.



What arguments can be used in this situation? How can you control your negative emotions? I think I've tried everything. There was logic and hysteria, nothing. I don’t want to be an ex-wife yet. Like living in a pigsty. There has to be an alternative to all of this. It can't end like this, meaningless and stupid!